A bit scared...

Hi guys,

I am going to Japan for six months for work (leaving next week). I am very excited about this opportunity, but at the same time really scared. To be honest, I pushed for this position because I was in Japan some years back and really loved the girls there and ended up sleeping around a bit even though I stayed about 10 days. Ever since I found out about this opportunity (I knew about it since late last year, but the final confirmation came in March), I have been obsessed thinking of the crazy things I will do over there...the number of girls I am gonna score, the abundance of shemale escorts over there (checking shemale escort sites almost every night, and checking their prices, trying to figure out how much per month I can afford since I am getting a good extra travel allowance, etc...), and stuff like that. After almost two weeks of dancing around that kind of porn substitutes, I finally slipped yesterday and today, and MBed after more than three weeks.

Now what I am worried about is how to stop this negative momentum building up towards my trip to Japan. How can I turn it into an amazing experience rather than end up stuck with crazy hookers/escorts chasing? Career wise, it is a very good opportunity as I am going to do some important strategy shit that I have never done before. I want to turn this into an adventure where I work hard enough, take my running/yoga to the next level, try to date as many "real" girls as possible, etc... and basically use it as a platform to escape the on and off porn addiction lifestyle that I am leading.

Also, I am really stressed because I have to finish tons of things at work, find tenants for my apartment, pack for six months etc. and usually when I am stressed, Ping and MBing become very tempting.

So any tips on the following two aspects are really appreciated:
- how to handle the next one week of stressful time without binging
- how to make the best out of my Japan experience (because in some videos about porn addiction I have heard that getting away from your normal work/life environment can work magic to the rebooting process).

Thank you guys!
O
 
Honestly man and no offense, but it doesn't seem like you're ready for the commitment needed to get clean.  This is a lifestyle change and if you do not embrace it 100% you will fail.  "Toning it down" while not bad, does not change your BRAIN chemistry to get over this very real hormone imbalance.  Fantasy and looking up craigslist,eros, even facebook at ANY images or stories that stimulate sexual arousal is PORN.  It does not have to be nudity or sex acts.  The ongoing stimulation of your brain with pornographic images is not allowing it to change.  If you 100% stop all porn, imagery, thoughts, fantasies, acts, etc then you will get clean.  This process might take every bit of 6 months and IMO will make your life way better and experience in Japan about relationships and real life rather than fantasy. 

My life has been exponentially better since stopping PMO.  Much of my ADD symptoms have disappeared, my relationship with my family, friends, kids and wife are the strongest they've ever been.  I'm working out, reading and doing other things that add to my overall health and well being.  I'm actually experiencing life rather than just "going through the motions".

Give yourself even 30 days of true "hard mode" and you will be shocked at how much better your emotional state will be (post-withdrawal phase that is). 

Enjoy your trip but realize there aren't any short cuts or band-aids to this so you have a choice to make. 
 
Top