Hi everyone,
I've just decided that I need a more solid way of overcoming porn and masturbation--what better way than to share with people in the same shoes. Recording my progress here is also likely to make it a more serious affair.
I have been watching pornography since I was 14 (I am 21 now), and during that time, I feel that I missed out on so much! I was never interested in making friends, uninterested in sports, had very interests besides computer games and pornography--I feel like my whole high-school and pre-university life went by me, wasted. All this time, I had been a very isolated person. I could Never talk to girls and was always so nervous with them, that I would admire girls and never speak to them. On one occasion, I really pretty girl liked me, but I never did a thing about it.
In University, things got somewhat better. At the start, I was getting busy with settling in and had not watched pornography for some time. For some strange reason, I became quite good with girls, and a friend told me she would never have suspected that I was from a boys' school. After a failed relationship shortly after, I fell into the whole thing all over again--I tried to drown out my feelings and forget about the girl by freely viewing pornography, and there was a point in time I viewed pornography on my phone every night, masturbating 2-3 times a day.
The effects--I could hardly speak to anyone! I became so reclusive. In the past, I was very friendly, but I just seemed to want to hide. When speaking to friends, I would just go blank, and could not even finish a sentence without pausing to think of a word I forgot. My memory became extremely poor, and I became so slow and sluggish. Many of my mornings are completely ruined, because I lie in bed for over an hour fantasizing and stimulating myself, such that I feel like shit after I get out of bed. This sexual restlessness ties me in bed, darkening my entire day.
I really don't want my life to pass me by like this. Getting a girlfriend? Well I can worry about that after I sort my life out, and getting rid of PMO would be step one. Well for you who are reading, thank you so much, and I hope I can get this sorted out.
JY
I've just decided that I need a more solid way of overcoming porn and masturbation--what better way than to share with people in the same shoes. Recording my progress here is also likely to make it a more serious affair.
I have been watching pornography since I was 14 (I am 21 now), and during that time, I feel that I missed out on so much! I was never interested in making friends, uninterested in sports, had very interests besides computer games and pornography--I feel like my whole high-school and pre-university life went by me, wasted. All this time, I had been a very isolated person. I could Never talk to girls and was always so nervous with them, that I would admire girls and never speak to them. On one occasion, I really pretty girl liked me, but I never did a thing about it.
In University, things got somewhat better. At the start, I was getting busy with settling in and had not watched pornography for some time. For some strange reason, I became quite good with girls, and a friend told me she would never have suspected that I was from a boys' school. After a failed relationship shortly after, I fell into the whole thing all over again--I tried to drown out my feelings and forget about the girl by freely viewing pornography, and there was a point in time I viewed pornography on my phone every night, masturbating 2-3 times a day.
The effects--I could hardly speak to anyone! I became so reclusive. In the past, I was very friendly, but I just seemed to want to hide. When speaking to friends, I would just go blank, and could not even finish a sentence without pausing to think of a word I forgot. My memory became extremely poor, and I became so slow and sluggish. Many of my mornings are completely ruined, because I lie in bed for over an hour fantasizing and stimulating myself, such that I feel like shit after I get out of bed. This sexual restlessness ties me in bed, darkening my entire day.
I really don't want my life to pass me by like this. Getting a girlfriend? Well I can worry about that after I sort my life out, and getting rid of PMO would be step one. Well for you who are reading, thank you so much, and I hope I can get this sorted out.
JY
