I am a 19 year old college student who has been struggling with what I assume to be porn induced ED...I didn't start masturbating until I was 14, which is later than almost all my friends. I always used porn. I would probably say I masturbated 2-3 times a week on average. The first few times in high school when I got the opportunity to have oral/vaginal sex I couldn't get hard but I would always come up with some excuse, "I was drunk", "She was a bad hook up", "She isn't attractive", etc. Then I got a girlfriend who I really really liked and was very attracted to. But it still didn't work. We were able to have sex under half the times we tried because I couldn't become/stay erect. Even when we were able to have sex I never felt like it was a very strong erection and I had trouble lasting. I finally decided to check the internet when I found out about porn-induced ED in March of 2013. I instantly stopped. Fast forward to today, about 14 months later. I still don't feel like any great progress has been made. But part of my problem is just the fact that I have been turning down the opportunity of sex because I am so sure that it won't work and I will have to come up with some excuse why I can't have sex. I have probably relapsed about 8-10 times in the year and 2 months of rebooting. But even when I relapse I have only looked at porn once, and that was out of a magazine, opposed to the internet porn. And I rarely ever masturbate more than once a month if I relapse.
There have been a couple of good signs, a few months ago I started getting morning wood again. And some mornings it is very hard, other mornings its a kinda weak erection. But before this started, I dont remember the last time I had morning wood. My sex drive is still pretty strong but mentally I am just still feel so far from being fully recovered.
I went through my freshman year at college without sex, which has been very tough. Especially when my friends tell me about girls that want to hook up with me and I just have to come up with reasons why I can't.
A couple things that I think could be affecting it:
1) I never used lube when I masturbating, ive read up on the "death grip" thing and am almost positive that that doesnt apply to me.
2) I am in a frat at college so I do drink relatively heavily but that has only been for a couple years.
3) Because of my high sex drive, I find myself fantasizing a lot about girls that I want to have sex with, which I hear is bad but I don't know how to stop my unconscious mind from fantasizing.
I know this post seems long and I honestly never really thought I would end up posting in one of these blogs because I am not a big proponent of posting things online, but it has gotten to the point where I just need to talk to people about it. I haven't told anyone about the problem and it is really started to get to me. I want to know if there is any advice anyone can give me on what works for them or maybe if they were in a similar situation. It seems like a year and 2 months is a long time and I should have started seeing significant progress by now, if not fully fixed.
There have been a couple of good signs, a few months ago I started getting morning wood again. And some mornings it is very hard, other mornings its a kinda weak erection. But before this started, I dont remember the last time I had morning wood. My sex drive is still pretty strong but mentally I am just still feel so far from being fully recovered.
I went through my freshman year at college without sex, which has been very tough. Especially when my friends tell me about girls that want to hook up with me and I just have to come up with reasons why I can't.
A couple things that I think could be affecting it:
1) I never used lube when I masturbating, ive read up on the "death grip" thing and am almost positive that that doesnt apply to me.
2) I am in a frat at college so I do drink relatively heavily but that has only been for a couple years.
3) Because of my high sex drive, I find myself fantasizing a lot about girls that I want to have sex with, which I hear is bad but I don't know how to stop my unconscious mind from fantasizing.
I know this post seems long and I honestly never really thought I would end up posting in one of these blogs because I am not a big proponent of posting things online, but it has gotten to the point where I just need to talk to people about it. I haven't told anyone about the problem and it is really started to get to me. I want to know if there is any advice anyone can give me on what works for them or maybe if they were in a similar situation. It seems like a year and 2 months is a long time and I should have started seeing significant progress by now, if not fully fixed.