If I could stop MO-ing in my bed at night and in the morning, I WIN!

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Pisces21

Active Member
Gentleman, this year so far has been rough. Many victories but many disappointments as well -

The reason I keep relapsing I am realizing... more than anything is the fact that I MO to Fantasy (porn-inspired) when I am in bed. It keeps happening.

Now I know here are some of my triggers:
1) Feelings of general horniness, imagination runs wild when I lie down in bed, it's crazy
2) Longing for intimacy and sex... if I can't get it right then and there I imagine a hot girl Ive desired and FMO..
3) Feelings of a failed attempt at getting with a girl romantically and the hopeless that comes with it

I am tired of being frustrated ... I have found that this is more of an issue for me than looking at porn or p-subs...

But the thing is FMO... leads to PMO. Eventually fantasy runs dry and I wanna look up more stuff.

What are some practical steps I can take to stop this...to dissociate horniness and fantasy with lying in bed? To just stop and prevent myself from masturbating to fantasy while in bed?

Thanks and please help because if I overcome this, I can get this shit out of my life for good. I can be rid of this bad habit I've perfected since I was 11.
 
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sender

Active Member
Have you ever had poison ivy?  The more you scratch it, the worse it itches.  This is just like that.  If you stop scratching, eventually the itch will subside and go away entirely, but it takes some time.  In the meantime, you just need to accept the discomfort that comes with having an itch and not scratching it.  It can be VERY uncomfortable, but you need to be willing to stay in the discomfort.  Any relief you get from scratching would be temporary and only makes the itch come back stronger!
 
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sender

Active Member
One more thing - don't try to suppress the thoughts and feelings, simply observe them and let them pass without acting on them.  Suppressing thoughts and feelings only sets up an internal conflict, making the struggle harder.  There need not be a conflict; just try to regard the unwanted thoughts as if they were coming from a radio outside of you, and that you're just going to turn the volume down on the radio so you can concentrate on other, more important things.  So acknowledge that you are having these thoughts whenever you have them, observe them and allow them to pass without taking any action.  When I'm having trouble sleeping due to [any sort of] invasive thoughts, what I do is to focus my attention on my breath and on my body, breathing muscle relaxation into one part at a time starting from my head moving slowly down to my toes.  I find this helps distract me from those thoughts and I'm asleep before I know it.  Give it a try!
 
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