Need help and advice....

[Alice0820]

Ok, so I've been watching porn since I was 10 (I'm 38 now) and have decided to give it up because it's always been really hard to orgasm with another person and I spend way too much time watching it. I'm also worried about the effects it has on dopamine levels and brain chemicals because I suffer from depression and don't want this to affect the healing of my depression. Anyway, the biggest problem I have is that I noticed it said in another post that to fully heal you should give up masturbation. I'm just wondering, does this mean you should give up masturbation forever or just until you heal, and if so how long does it take to heal? My last date was June of 2015 and before that was 4 years ago. I'm a lesbian and lesbian women are really picky about how much money you make, what sort of job you have, and what degree you have from college (or at least the ones I've met are). I'm still getting my life in order and I'm not sure when my next date will be. I've attempted to give up porn a few times before but always came back due to lack of a love life and have never attempted to give up masturbation. It is realistic that I will be able to give up porn AND masturbation when I'm not getting sex from anyone else either? Just wondering what others who are more experienced with the issue of porn addiction and withdrawal have to say about this.

 

[William]

You are posting in a porn addiction forum, so, I will presume you acknowledge the addiction.

During the reboot/rewire, which lasts at least 90 days, aka the hard 90, aka hard move 90 days, avoid it.  On the other side, explore who and what you want your sex life is. 

 

[malando]

I don't think you have to give up masturbation forever, just for a while so you can let your brain rebalance. After that, the key is to not be doing it to porn. I think having a realistic fantasy will be ok, but try to stay away from watching actual images and videos, and fantasising about unrealistic stuff that are not part of a normal sexual relationship. Just curious, but are your symptoms similar to what men experience? ie. difficulty getting aroused or reaching O without porn?