Do a Lot of others tend to suffer with OTHER addictions too?

[Snap309]

Greetings community!~
I am fairly new here at the forums and JUST getting the idea of what & how to post questions and comments.
I am a 60 y/o male (married) that had a Looooong history of having addictive behaviors throughout my life. I can give you a typical log of my sexuality and porn use, but I find that the MORE I read over others stories, there also seems to be a core "thread" of general addictive type patterns that you would find in Drug abuse/ alcoholism/ gambling/ eating disorders/ etc

I personally believe (and its JUST my opinion) that certain people have predetermined "addictive personalities" that come out as obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors that "fuel" the addictions (which MANY overlap through the yrs and at the SAME time frame)

I have been in AA and NA groups for mega yrs (on & off) and learned much "transferrable" ideas and patterns that Ican see in my  addictive behaviors (such as Porn use)

I had the WILD idea lately (quite a few times) of actually SELLING or THROWING OUT my laptop /c I got SO disgusted with myself for using it for Porn purposes. MY personal joke to people was...."PCs are only good for 2 major things- Emailing & PORN!  LOL" (OK- Maybe it NOT that F---- funny!  LOL)
However- it DID become an issue with my relationship with my wife AND my ED problems.
Of course- I NEVER made any connection between the two UNTIL I read the article in TIME Mag.

I have SO much more to my story from many other aspects- but I wanted to touch upon THIS area of ADDICTION in general and if others found it to be a link too.
Please contact me by PM or to this thread to discuss this topic or any others that you would like.
I want to reach out to as many people as possible to build support/ knowledge/ and friendships.
Hope to here from anyone soon...Whats YOUR ideas?
Snap309

 

[Gracie]

My husband had past issues with drug abuse about 30 years ago.  He smoked a lot too.  2 packs a day.  When he was one year past qutting smoking was when things started down the primrose path to porn.  Alcohol was not his thing though.  I am sure there are others here as well.  You might also put this question in the porn addiction thread too.

 

[Doc]

Yep,
Compulsive behaviors run the gambit.  I'm a 29 year (6 years clean) nicotine addict.  Smoked like the proverbial chimney but any source of nicotine can put me right back to it.  I still deal with compulsive eating as well which has left me about 50 pounds heavier than I should be at this age.  No doubt in my mind that those of us prone to compulsive behaviors are likely to have more than one.
R

 

[Branch]

Hey, Snap,

Welcome to RN!

Yes, I used to smoke cigarettes.  Took me many attempts to quit, but I did and haven't smoked in many years now.

From the reading I've done--quite a bit--it's pretty common for p addicts to have or have had other addictions, but it's not always true.  Internet porn is so EASY for people to get hooked on, and so many have gotten hooked, it seems to be true that people can become hooked just by having the opportunity, according to at least a few experts I've read who study addiction.

I've also thought about getting rid of my internet connection and going to the library, or using a friend's computer, to go on-line once or twice a week and catch up on email and personal business I do on the computer.  I haven't done this so far but still keep it as a possibility if necessary.

I suggest Gabe's "Welcome to Reboot Nation!"  It's the best place to start. Go to Forum Rules-Guidelines-Suggestions on the home page.  Click it and then click the second topic, also called Forum Rules-Guidelines-Suggestions.  Scroll down to  "Welcome to Reboot Nation!" 

Maybe the best thing on this website or any website like it is William's post, Gentlemen Now We Begin.  A must read.  And a must reread.

Here's link to William:

http://legacy.rebootnation.org/index.php?topic=1256.450

Also check out the website yourbrainonporn if you haven't already.

I hope this info helps.

Wishing you well!

Branch

 

[TK-421]

I've posted a bit about this issue in my own journal. In my own experience, there are a lot of similarities between porn addiction and other addictions. As a teenager I drank to excess and wound up in AA in my early twenties (more than 20 years since I quit drinking). I also used to smoke and gave that up about the same time I quit drinking. Only now can I really see some of the parallels between these addictions and that, to be honest, I think the porn addiction took the place of my drinking. I do think some personalities are more susceptible to addictive behaviours, for whatever reason.

 

[Snap309]

Hi guys.....
Thanks so much for your input and suggesting a few "readings" I can do to get some general info regarding the site and others thoughts.

Addictions had me my whole life (mostly various drugs) but as we learn from AA and other groups-a drug is a drug is a drug.....and I now see how Porn is in the mix too.
I also believe in "addictive personalities" and THAT is what gets me "hooked" on so many things!
My obsessive thoughts leads to my compulsive behaviors...and THAT all leads me down roads I never thought I would take.
Regarding the possibility of throwing away my PC....I seriously think about that almost everyday!
For me- its like keeping 20 bottles of Vodka and some cocaine in the house "just in case" company arrives...but its NOT for me!  LOL  (Now there's a joke!  lol)

Anyway- getting rid of my PC IS a real possibility (I'm at the library now!
Most people would say that is extreme- BUT I am not a "Techi type" person and I really dont CARE if I have a PC at home (I know- My wife thinks Im F----- Insane!)  LOL

 

[Robmetta]

Hello SnapChat309, Yes I, in common with others in this thread, had other addictions. I did have a real problem with alcohol, did go to AA and Al Anon meetings. Maybe I still have a problem with alcohol but it is not the big issue for me. For example these days I can actually have a single glass of wine or beer and leave it at that and I haven't had any alcohol for a while. However it was an issue and I did seek help for my binge drinking at weekends.

I am not sure that I agree that there are 'addictive personalities' but you may be right. I think it is kind of disheartening if you start to think of yourself or someone else as having an addictive personality, because then, the logical follow -on is 'so why bother trying? you will never be cured, may as well given in'. I think it is more down to nurture rather than nature - the things, events and people that shape us as children and young adults.

However when it comes to sex drive I do  think there are people who have a strong or very strong sex drive while others that I have met had a much weaker drive and seemed fairly indifferent to the whole thing. But even those who have  a strong sex drive cannot be described as addictive and do not necessarily resort to porn; one particular friend I remember confessed to me a great need for sex but he did not resort to porn or have extra marital affairs. In the end he said he adjusted to his wife's diminished need for sex; they still had sex but less often than he liked and he got round this by throwing himself in to other activities - joined a choir, played tennis, rugby, was active socially and fundraised for charity. He had tremendous energy. I wish I had opened up to him more. He was frank with me but I was somewhat ashamed and intimidated by him because he had resolved a key issue in his life - sex - which I had not even begun to address and I did not want to admit my porn addiction.

 

[klarson27]

Yes.. I've abused alcohol (haven't drank in years)... relapsed a few times over the years with marijuana and overall I have an addictive personality.

 

[laalee]

Great Topic i believe that i can transfer Addictions,  I am Addicted to Anonymous sex and Porn, i have been in fellowship for 6 years and have 6 months sobriety from Anonymous sex,  i Smoke like a chimney and Alcohol has been a problem now for probably 6 mnths drinking every night. Gambling was an issue also but not Atm.

I am also co-dependent
Most of my Friends i have met in Fellowship are also in AA,NA, CODA OA GA and Slaa so goes to show i beleive in cross Additions

 

[Snap309]

Its interesting how we all have different "perspectives" on addictions, but it seems we all generally agree that there is usually "cross addictions" for most people.

I realize that a lot of people do not feel comfortable with the term "addictive personality".
I just use THAT terminology simply b/c it seems to fit ME!
As mentioned before....I would say at some point have been addictive to ANYTHING that would give me a good "Buzz" or rush to my brain. This also includes "high risk" activities such as rock climbing/ sky diving/ racing/ or anything "pushing the limits" for a dopamine rush!
My wife and I also explored some "kinky sex" with others for the "thrill" of it.

I remember how I got GREAT flooding rushes of new excitement when I first started getting interested in girls in adolescence.....THAT was probably (to this day) THE best HIGH I ever got!!!!!
I LOVED being I "in love" (or at least lust) and I didn't even understand WHAT I was experiencing...but t felt fucking great!
Again- my brain was being flooded with new chemical rushes that I sought after in any way possible.
This led to various drugs and any other experiences that turned me on.

So NOW I believe that its not b/c I am a "sex fiend" for seeking out Porn...but its another form of my addictive behavior.
Of course (like I say ALL the time) this is only MY beliefs on this topic...I could be totally off on it.
However- I love what everyone is contributing to this thread...PLEASE continue!

 

[Branch]

Its interesting how we all have different "perspectives" on addictions, but it seems we all generally agree that there is usually "cross addictions" for most people.

I realize that a lot of people do not feel comfortable with the term "addictive personality".
I just use THAT terminology simply b/c it seems to fit ME!
As mentioned before....I would say at some point have been addictive to ANYTHING that would give me a good "Buzz" or rush to my brain. This also includes "high risk" activities such as rock climbing/ sky diving/ racing/ or anything "pushing the limits" for a dopamine rush!
My wife and I also explored some "kinky sex" with others for the "thrill" of it.

I remember how I got GREAT flooding rushes of new excitement when I first started getting interested in girls in adolescence.....THAT was probably (to this day) THE best HIGH I ever got!!!!!
I LOVED being I "in love" (or at least lust) and I didn't even understand WHAT I was experiencing...but t felt fucking great!
Again- my brain was being flooded with new chemical rushes that I sought after in any way possible.
This led to various drugs and any other experiences that turned me on.

So NOW I believe that its not b/c I am a "sex fiend" for seeking out Porn...but its another form of my addictive behavior.
Of course (like I say ALL the time) this is only MY beliefs on this topic...I could be totally off on it.
However- I love what everyone is contributing to this thread...PLEASE continue!

Hey, Snap,

I'm still learning to use it, but in the 5 or so years I've been a p-addict, I've read and watched a lot about porn addiction.  If you keep learning about this stuff, you'll keep finding ideas/questions that are controversial for experts, therapists, addicts--everybody involved.  Internet porn is relatively new, and addiction in general has been a tough problem for a long time. 

But I'm not sure the controversies matter that much.  Call it an addiction, compulsion, obsession or just a challenge, my porn use has been wrecking my life and I need to get past it.  WHATEVER YOU CALL IT, IT'S AN F'ING PROBLEM.

And apparently the only cure is abstinence.  Not to say you have to succeed in your first reboot or you're doomed to failure--if anybody's done that, they're not on RN, because failure to quit is the reason people join RN in the first place.  Not to say, either, that besides abstinence there are strict reboot rules.  No two paths are identical.

So I'd say we're all dealing with the same problem and seeking the same solution.  That's the main thing.  And there are many, many great ideas and stories about how to get the job done.  Here on RN, on YBOP, on other websites, in books, on YouTube.

Keep looking and you'll find your answers.  I think you're already to starting to find some.  If it's helpful for you to see yourself as an addictive personality who seeks the dopamine rush of addictive behavior, including porn use, others might see things differently, but who's to say you're wrong?

Just some food for thought that might be helpful.

Love your energy, man.  Good luck going forward!

Branch