Discovered this site tonight, and I think I need it.

[Nacho-Mysticism]

Hello all

I discovered yourbrainonporn.com tonight (can't remember how, now) and I saw the list of example symptoms here: http://yourbrainonporn.com/reboot_your_brain
I realised a lot of them quite possibly applied to me and I took a closer look. The more I read the more I think I may in fact have a problem.

The funny thing is, I never thought I did, but not because of denial. A psychiatrist even asked once if I thought I had a porn addiction, I said I doubted it. He said I'd know it if I did - well, perhaps not!

The thing is, I don't even watch the mainstream stuff, I tried it but never really liked it. I prefer other things and even though I had heard of porn addiction, I always thought since what I looked at wasn't actually *porn*, then it didn't count. It seems I was wrong. It's all still pixels. It's all still not real, right?

The final part to the puzzle was that after recently getting a sexual partner for the first time in my life, I found myself nowhere near as aroused as I thought I would be. It all seems to fit together.

I decided to start my reboot tonight. I started deleting files on my computer and I have not looked at anything this evening. But it's amazing how often you realise you do something when you decide to be aware of it!
Sitting there at my computer, I'd be waiting for emails to download, or Windows to check updates, and I kept catching myself automatically and quite often trying to go back.

That in itself was another eye-opener!

I will try for a 90-day challenge starting tonight and see what happens. I actually hope porn addiction is my problem, even though I can see it's going to be difficult, I will be glad if stopping this madness helps!

I think it's quite possible I have unintentionally done a lot of damage to my life, sexually and otherwise.  :-\

 

[yesyes1234]

Good post, and good to see you're trying to change things.

I don't think porn-addictions are that self-evident either. Many consume P everyday or every second day so the link between the symptoms and the course are harder to spot. Plus it usually takes a while after a p-session before some of the negative  kick in and other symptoms are only obvious in the actual situation they effect.

I think it took a while to discover for a lot of us. I know I struggled for years before I realised it. And also to realise the fact that it is a real addiction and should be treated as such. And I think there are a huge percentage out there who are addicts or have addicttraits, but haven't discovered it yet. A lot of addicts get conditioned to the raised dopamine-levels to a point where it is part of what makes them function normally.

The addiction comes from artificially elevating your dopamine levels, as far as I understand, so whatever gets you there is not that relevant. The more f-up the material the worse the reboot will be though, as a general rule.

Have you experienced any cravings or withdrawal symptoms so far? It doesn't sound like your possible addiction is that bad, but just so you are prepared, you should know that the reboot period might be worse than you anticipated.

 

[Nacho-Mysticism]

I will not be surprised if things do get worse in the coming days. I have prior experience with another addiction, that I am clean from for over 6 months now and proud of it. It was difficult to stop though and I know I might be in for much the same again.

Thanks for your encouragement.