Alittle about myself - i started PMO when i was young and i remember the days of magazines , porn channel while being scrambled. Finally we'd get internet and i was in a PMO heaven. I was very social kind of guy , had alot alot of friends, very outgoing. I find myself now at 32 and i have been PMO almost everyday for the last 10-15 years and did not think too much of it. I started become anti-social i noticed as i got more addicted to PMO and found i was not in a place where i'd like to be. I had to make a change and i seeing huge changes so far.
I ran across YBOP website and read some of the symptons which happens to me. I had ED and would have to self masturbate with a girl, i had brain fog almost like i couldnt think past what i wanted. I couldn't speak coherently nor could i string witty or well thought out sentences which made communication pretty hard. On top of that, i had the biggest anxiety ever with people which i have never had before. I would sweat or back would sweat uncontrollably when conversing with someone. This was strange considering i've always been very sociable kind of guy.
1st week
I now have a kid on the way with my wife (7.5month) and i figured change was necessary and i would cut out all PMO until i have reboot. Let me tell you 1st week was absolutely not a problem. No thoughts of sex , and mr happy was not interfering at all.
2nd week
I am noticing alot more awareness around me, almost like my senses has increased. The demon inside pushes me very hard at times and i would get insomnia just thinking about it , would get up read this site until i have calmed down before i can go back to bed. I have not waken with any woody (except to piss in the morning - unless this counts as woody) yet nor have i got any wet dreams but i noticed i am starting to fantasize more about girls whom i meet.
3rd week
The mind is the strongest and when the urges kick in , the mind will tell you anything to justify it. The justification of getting prostitutes because the need of rebooting to real people. This was the toughest because i felt the gratification of looking for one and i would not be able to sleep knowing i would be able to get some (dopamine overload) and i find i get too excited to sleep as much as i try to fight it. At the end i have fought it off as i watched those two videos and i believe we should kick start these bad habits, but not to take up another bad habit.
I want to become the most alpha male and this is my story to recovery. When demons come and you are fighting it, some of the videos that i have found helped me the most.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBftWGQuwGM
and
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGhnoVQdTIo
I ran across YBOP website and read some of the symptons which happens to me. I had ED and would have to self masturbate with a girl, i had brain fog almost like i couldnt think past what i wanted. I couldn't speak coherently nor could i string witty or well thought out sentences which made communication pretty hard. On top of that, i had the biggest anxiety ever with people which i have never had before. I would sweat or back would sweat uncontrollably when conversing with someone. This was strange considering i've always been very sociable kind of guy.
1st week
I now have a kid on the way with my wife (7.5month) and i figured change was necessary and i would cut out all PMO until i have reboot. Let me tell you 1st week was absolutely not a problem. No thoughts of sex , and mr happy was not interfering at all.
2nd week
I am noticing alot more awareness around me, almost like my senses has increased. The demon inside pushes me very hard at times and i would get insomnia just thinking about it , would get up read this site until i have calmed down before i can go back to bed. I have not waken with any woody (except to piss in the morning - unless this counts as woody) yet nor have i got any wet dreams but i noticed i am starting to fantasize more about girls whom i meet.
3rd week
The mind is the strongest and when the urges kick in , the mind will tell you anything to justify it. The justification of getting prostitutes because the need of rebooting to real people. This was the toughest because i felt the gratification of looking for one and i would not be able to sleep knowing i would be able to get some (dopamine overload) and i find i get too excited to sleep as much as i try to fight it. At the end i have fought it off as i watched those two videos and i believe we should kick start these bad habits, but not to take up another bad habit.
I want to become the most alpha male and this is my story to recovery. When demons come and you are fighting it, some of the videos that i have found helped me the most.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBftWGQuwGM
and
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGhnoVQdTIo