Relapsed at 73 Days

[Reboot_Dude]

Feel kinda like shit now as I know I have a horrible slow climb back up the numbers to come.

For weeks I'd felt completely in control but then little urges began to flare up. I started to crave contact with girls, like I was healing and wanted to seek their company. So I allowed myself to join some dating sites again. I had a few interesting leads but a couple of them were mainly motivated through sex, one in particular got me quite riled up the past few days and eventually it became too much. I just masturbated to sensation in bed, but I felt I might climax without even touching I was that turned on after the last few days.

I feel bad for my lack of control and that I've set myself back when I was so close to 90, but it makes me wonder how you move onto a real relationship when you're so unnaturally horny from abstaining from ejaculation? How do you behave more rationally?

Hopefully my 70+ days have done some good anyway!

 

[Numez]

your 73 days are good, 1 relapse is not going to erase all progress thats for sure.

my advice is to never use dating sites because there are lots of pictures. for porn addicts and i believe ex porn addicts too, its the worst place to meet new girls.

direct that extra energy and libido towards real world, work on your courage to meet new girls in real life.

good luck have fun.

 

[Reboot_Dude]

Cheers dude, my main concern is erasing progress. I take some consolation from knowing some have said they have had releases here and there through their successful Reboots. I know the only solution is just to keep going!

For me I don't think I was ever truly addicted to porn, I've barely touched it in a year, my main problem was lack of experience with real girls and a reliance on masturbation created my ED - or so I suspect! I'm hoping I just need some more practice!

 

[Stevew]

I relapsed at 100 days to dating websites... unless you are extremely strict with how you view images/profiles... you are digging yourself into a hole. Once you've got a girl had sex and continued that for 2-3 years maybe you will be at a stage where you can carefully use dating sites...

It sucks ass though because every relationship seems to start online these days.. especially amongst young adults.

 

[Reboot_Dude]

I have come off the dating sites now, but I will go back when I'm stronger. I won't go into it but my own personal living and working circumstances mean it's very difficult for me to meet people, dating sites are the only realistic way I can get myself out there. I am not one for trawling bars and I never have been.

I will just have to learn from this experience, which is so far what my reboot has been about, learning all the different ways you can fuck up! Still, I've probably masturbated about 8 times in the last year, I'd do that in a week before. That's gotta be progress right? I'll do more than 73 days this time!

 

[Numez]

we make up meeting new people to be so much more complicated than it actually is because we are scared shitless what other might think about us or how uncomfortable we may feel. you can always meet new people unless you are existing somewhere where there are no people. if there are people, you can meet them. its simple as that. you can meet new people on the way to the work or coming back home or when you are walking your dog, going to gym etc. there are people everywhere, bus stations, sidewalks, parks, parking lots, supermarkets... parties, clubs, bars, dating sites etc. is very narrowed way of looking at it and is caused by social anxiety. if you want to meet new people but you are making excuses for not doing so, it means you have social anxiety. since when saying hi and trying to start a conversation with someone became bad behavior?

knowing this can get you unstuck and give you something to work on (fears and anxieties) instead of blaming circumstances for not having social life that you want.