Hey you guys I came to let you guys know that I thought about what all you guys told me. I was thinking about it the whole day. I realized that I'm not gay or bi because I never thought about if I'm gay or bi after that homosexual experience. I was only afraid of people finding out about my experience and thinking that I was gay. Also finding out my hook up profiles to find girls that wants to do threesomes and more. I realized I started to worry and trip out when I looked up sex addiction and how it can cause same sex experiences and people getting confused and all that crazy shit. I've noticed that right that second when I looked it up my ocd used that as a weakness. Today my girlfriend was talking to her sister about a good looking guy. I got jealous and insecure but I let it go because I noticed its human nature to see others. I know where my woman stays. Thats another reason why I realized I was straight because if I was gay I would be all quiet and all up in they business. I also do MMA for a living because its my passion and it helps me control my ADHD and OCD. I be around muscular guys and rolled on matts with guys because Jiu-Jitsu. I never ever thought about any gay or sexual thoughts at that time. I said to myself I still fantasize about girls with their booty and all so how can I be gay. Thanks to you guys I finally understand that My OCD caused all of this ever since I was curious to look up if sex addiction can cause a gay encounter. It started talking about people coming out as gay and bi and I lost my mind. Now that I know how to defeat this OCD I can finally move on with my life. I really want to thank you guys so much. You guys are really awesome and chill dudes. I hope you guys make it far in life and rear naked choke this addiction lol. To all you guys suffering with OCD. You can beat it! It will turn everything you love and care about and use it against you. Even your reputation and what people see you as. I was so afraid and embarrassed that people would call me gay or bi and find all my hook up sites that I never used because my dream is to be in the UFC. I felt like I would be seen as the gay famous mma fighter lol. So my dumb ass looked up sex addiction and homosexual experiences and got the wrong outcome. What ever you do don't look for reassurance. All I did was think about my past up until now. I figured it out myself. Trust me you will get through this.
How I overcame HOCD
- Thread starter BoBo129
- Start date
The anxiety will decrease when you stop trying to fight the ocd. It used my traumatizing homosexual experience against me. Then I got pissed of and looked it up. I realized that having a homosexual experience doesnt make you gay or bi because no one knows what the reason is for only you. I did had this guy blow me because there was no women in my area. That night I didnt want that blowjob anymore. I tried to leave but shit went the wrong way. Fear got in the way because I didnt want to be exposed to my family as a sex addict or looked at wrong so I had to go with it. I had so much anger for not fightinf off that guy instead I was afraid. I mean I understand why I was afraid I was 18 and skinny asf at the time.HOCD was using that horrible homosexual experience I had against me. I couldn't sleep and I was always irritated.
Death Trap
Active Member
You're on the wrong track, man. I recommend you go back through my posts in the other thread, and also that you go see a professional. You can't treat a personality disorder (which I don't think you have anyway) from reading a book or talking with anonymous people on a forum.
N
Numez
Guest
oh man im crazy about ufc, thats my favorite shit when it comes to "sport". you can blame it on nofap if you succeed, millions of people will see it because ufc is the most popular mma organization ;D GSP said that his OCD helps him to win fights because he gets more prepared ;D with 9 title defenses he is the best ww of all time 
look at this dude, im glad he did not logged in any time recently because most of the time i read something from him he just talks people down. who said anything against seeing a professional? someone who overcame HOCD just wants to share his experience with others and you find a way to talk him down?Death Trap said:
yeah dont read books but go read through his posts in other thread ;D lol