Diet, Dopamine and Relapse

[Whiskey Dick]

The understanding about dopamine is a game changer. Just because I'm on day 4, doesn't mean I haven't tried to quit many multiple times over the years. Now, because of understanding dopamine, I know what I did wrong. In the past I would quit porn but still fantasize about porn, or still look at bikini models or whatever I could to light up my dopamine fix. But one other interesting thing always occurred...weird food cravings.

I started craving dairy products (which is weird because I don't consume them) and lots of caffeine (which I'd only occasionally consume). And what was interesting was, if I had milk, many of my flatline symptoms would improve. Same with caffeine. And then, inevitably, I would start looking at porn again. Dairy or caffeine were triggers for me. Now I understand why.

Dairy is high in phenylalanine and tyrosine, which are amino acids that are essential for dopamine production. And caffeine induces dopamine release in the nucleus accumbens!http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12151508 For those who don't know what that is, it's a region in the forebrain which is often called our "pleasure center", which lights up when we feed our addiction. So, in other words, I was unconsciously creating a cocktail that acts as a porn substitute, registering in my brain as the same thing. Or close to it.

So, for me, and maybe others, caffeine is going to be a poison on the path. And I'm going to watch my phenalynine/tyrosine intake. Foods high in those are:

1) Spirulina. No problem here, as this stuff is disgusting anyway.
2) Dairy, particularly casein (cottage cheese)
3) Eggs
4) Soy, which is a problematic food anyway
5) Game meats
6) Nuts and seeds
7) Shellfish

Now, there's no way I can cut out all the foods above, or else I wouldn't be able to eat! I eat eggs for breakfast every morning, for instance. But I think it would be a good idea to simply be aware of this list and increase my intake of veggies and fruits and all the other healthy foods not on the list.

Anyway, food for thought (dirty thoughts, mind you)

 

[William]

Yep, for me too, understanding that porn, hypersexual thoughts, etc., results in a dopamine high, was the game changer for me too.  I believe I watched the Gary Wilson TEDx talk, found here on Gabe's home page, and quit porn forever, immediately.  I count my quit date as June 18, 2013; that is the date I first watched the Wilson video.  Prior to that I focused--ignorantly, incorrectly--on the mechanics of the problem.  Prior to that I focused on not PMOing, no MOing, but I still used porn daily, meaning though I did not know it, I was keeping my dopamine levels up. At that point I could still have sex, but could not O during sex, only with P.  Addiction to dopamine, aka porn addiction, has nothing to do with Oing, MOing, or PMOing; the addiction has to do with flaming hypersexualized thoughts in the brain's reward center, which is what porn consumption does.

It is interesting that you mention food cravings.  I never had those myself, but dopamine's other function, in addition to rewarding the search for sex, is rewarding the search for food.  Dopamine can be said to inspire both lust and hunger. 

But dopamine is the culprit in porn addiction and a lot of guys do not understand that.  Too many guys don't even know that "porn addiction" exists or can exist or that they exist in that state.  Every answer starts with a question, and the questions any guy reading this must ask are:

1)  Why do I like porn so much, why is it so fascinating, why I am so compelled to watch it, why is it so difficult for me to stop?

The answer to that is:  Dopamine.  If we got a dopamine fix from watching paint peel, a lot of would spend our times doing that.

2)  What is the definition of my problem, am I addicted?

If you go to Gabe's home page, on the left hand side, you will see a link that says "Road to Recovery."  Gabe identifies defining the problem as the most important first step to overcoming the addiction.  To start fixing the addiction, you must first identify it as the problem.  It is a problem than can be solved.  It won't be solved overnight--don't expect that, it took years to get here it, accept it will take months to overcome.  And it won't be without effort or pain; withdrawals are just part of it, but accept that and the recovery goes from a huge problem with no end in sight to a relatively small problem with a beginning, a middle, and an end.  In the end you get clean, you take off the chains of porn, and you become something you may not have been for years...free. 

For me when I first thought "I am addicted," when I first understood my dopamine response to porn, that was the moment I determined to get clean and to never relapse again, NEVER, and I never have and I never will.  The problem was that, though I did not know it or conceive of it this way, porn had become a crutch for me.  Having a bad day?  Get a porn/dopamine high.  Relationship not fantastic?  Get a porn/dopamine high.  Porn had become something like my only friend, the one friend I could always rely on for a release from the stress and anxiety of living.  What I did not know was that porn itself, though abuse of my own reward center, was the reason for a lot of my stress and anxiety.  Defriending porn was like telling a close friend they have to go away, you will never see them again, never play with then again, forever.  It was difficult, but for a guy quitting, absolutely necessary. 

Keep posting Weepy, reading posts and replying are part of my recovery, to thank you.

Much love. 

Will I AM. 

 

[Whiskey Dick]

Yeah William, thanks bro. Dopamine's role in addictive behavior has been well known to me for some time, but I never made the connection to me and porn. How could I have missed that years ago?

But instead of flagellating myself, I could learn from that lesson and re-examine why I've failed in the past. Part of that analysis yielded the insight that foods have been big triggers. But I bet there's many more, like escapist behaviors (TV, internet, video games, etc), and there's undoubtedly superior alternatives, from a dopamine perspective, like reading books or working out.

Or posting here on the forum. I still haven't broke my internet compulsions, but that's fine, so long as I stay on this site and ones like it as much as possible.

 

[William]

Yeah William, thanks bro. Dopamine's role in addictive behavior has been well known to me for some time, but I never made the connection to me and porn. How could I have missed that years ago?

But instead of flagellating myself, I could learn from that lesson and re-examine why I've failed in the past. Part of that analysis yielded the insight that foods have been big triggers. But I bet there's many more, like escapist behaviors (TV, internet, video games, etc), and there's undoubtedly superior alternatives, from a dopamine perspective, like reading books or working out.

Or posting here on the forum. I still haven't broke my internet compulsions, but that's fine, so long as I stay on this site and ones like it as much as possible.

Weepy, solving porn addiction will not solve all of life's problems.  Other side of the coin, porn addiction is not about all of life's problems.  I advise walking the narrow path when it comes to solving porn addiction, make it about one thing and one thing only, solving porn addiction.  Don't over analyze it, don't try and out think it.  Porn addiction is a Pavlovian response to sexual thoughts, that is all.  Once you get clean of it, you can tackle the other things we all have to deal with, but don't tie in those other things to getting clean.  It will just distract you.  And that is what the addiction wants, it wants you distracted, not focused, because a man who is distracted is more likely to relapse.  This is experience talking. 

Peace.