Retro Gamer
Member
sleepking69 said:
Thanks dude.
sleepking69 said:
Yeah man, there's difinitely a lot of setbacks. It's a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, haha. And yes, I agree, about the same here.
Quitting porn and masturbation for life, and never going back.
- Thread starter Retro Gamer
- Start date
Thanks dude.
Yeah man, there's difinitely a lot of setbacks. It's a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, haha. And yes, I agree, about the same here.
Retro Gamer
Member
klm5000 said:
Thank you, Klm5000. Likewise, I find your journal is a good read too.
Retro Gamer
Member
112 Days without porn or masturbation
Since my last update there's been a lot of heavy withdrawal symptoms and struggling. I've been feeling really low, really lazy, really depressed, fatigued and tired. It was almost as bad as the withdrawal symptoms I went through near the beginning of this reboot. This leads me to believe that there is a huge spike of urges and withdrawals after the 100 day mark, so be ready for it and don't give in. Another reason which could have been the cause of my deteriorating mood recently was maybe the fact that I spent a lot of time thinking about a girl I like, thinking back about previous relations, I wasted time watching movies again, and I also spent a lot of time on Facebook and dating sites (with no results, unfortunately. I must be real ugly or something, haha). I've said it before and I know full well how much of a stumbling block fantasising and/or wasting time on social media can be. It's not good for a recovering person, not good at all. There's even research out there which demonstrates a correlation between mental health problems and amount of social media use. So I'm staying away again.
I've learned to keep my thoughts and emotions in check now, but it has been really hard these last few days. The girl I liked I work, I don't even really like anymore, so that was just a bit of lustful crush which has gone away now. I keep my mind and my eyes away from here now (and away from other girls too). I still don't feel anywhere near recovered/healed, and I know that an addiction recovery process takes a long time so I'm just going to keep going and try and stay strong. I was so close to relapsing recently, very, very close. The urges can be extremely strong. And so I'm going back to my original plan and I'm sticking to it for good from now on: No wasting time browsing on the internet, No social media, No wasting time watching TV/movies.
I'm still eating healthy and exercising regularly, but there is only so much exercise you can do until you feel exhausted and depressed due to overtraining so I suggest for people not to go too crazy on excessive excercise. There needs to be a balance in everything you. When aspects of your life are unbalanced, that's when your mood deteriorates. There can certainly be too much of a good thing; even too much sex with your girlfriend can leave you irritaed, stressed, anxious, fatigued, brain fogged. It is a common misconception that if you find a spouse, then everything will be ok because you would not need to use porn anymore because you would have an outlet for your sexual energy. But this is very wrong. There are countless stories, journals and articles out there which show that getting into a relationship while you are a lustful sexual freak - or porn addict - will eventually bring the relationship to problems. Your addiction would still be there and it would still need feeding, and men resort to hiding behind their spouses back, lying and acting out in their perverse ways. There's too many people out there hiding their porn addictions from their girlfriends, the evidence is in many of the journals. I myself was in a relationship with a girl who I eventually lost interest in and didn't find her attractive anymore, I didn't respect her like I should have done and this was due to all the videos and images I was putting into my addicted brain. In bed with her, I even had to close my eyes sometimes and bring up some of those perverse scenes in order to do the deed. Thinking about it now, she was a great person, we could have been really happy together, but my mind was elsewhere and it's too late now...
Cold showers have helped me cool down the urges, raise my moods and divert my thoughts. They've been a really big help and I highly recommend them. Not warm showers, not slightly cold, but really cold. Go and do it now, have a quick cold shower and see how much your mood improves due to the shock of the cold water. It's great for your health too. There are many benefits from cold showers, but the ones I found most effective for my reboot is the benefit of relieving depression, raising energy levels, improving focus and concetration. Mind you, the effect is not very long lasting, but you can have as many cold showers in a day as you want! And over time, as your addiction becomes weaker, the cold water treatment should help you to feel better and more energetic for the long term. So next time you're feeling like crap and you can't get those lusty thoughts out of your head, go have a quick cold splash and then sit down to read a book or do something else that's productive.
So, in conclusion, that is how it has been these last few days, I've been feeling shit and my motivation has dropped back down to nil, to wanting to just lay in bed or on the sofa all day: not good. I believe the things that have brought me back down to such a depressing level are dating sites, sexual thoughts, fantasising, Facebook and TV. I was extremely close to acting out by watching porn again and I was seriously starting to doubt that there is any real benefits to sexual abstinence. This was wrong thinking, this was the addiction trying to convince me again with it's lies. I have tried to concentrate on just getting through the day and telling myself that maybe tomorrow I will feel better. People, focus on just getting another clean day in and don't think too far into the future because that is a sure way to lose hope and fail. And don't beat yourselves up too much about what has been in the past, and don't get lowspirited about the things you don't have in life because that is also a sure way to fail. Leave the past and the future with The Creator, be grateful for your lot in life and focus on today and what you can do to improve your life today. I've pushed through these last few struggles and I'm so glad I didn't give in, that would have been a long streak down the drain and a lot of progress lost. And today I'm feeling rather positive and optimistic, a little more energetic, and my motivation levels have come back up again.
Peace
Since my last update there's been a lot of heavy withdrawal symptoms and struggling. I've been feeling really low, really lazy, really depressed, fatigued and tired. It was almost as bad as the withdrawal symptoms I went through near the beginning of this reboot. This leads me to believe that there is a huge spike of urges and withdrawals after the 100 day mark, so be ready for it and don't give in. Another reason which could have been the cause of my deteriorating mood recently was maybe the fact that I spent a lot of time thinking about a girl I like, thinking back about previous relations, I wasted time watching movies again, and I also spent a lot of time on Facebook and dating sites (with no results, unfortunately. I must be real ugly or something, haha). I've said it before and I know full well how much of a stumbling block fantasising and/or wasting time on social media can be. It's not good for a recovering person, not good at all. There's even research out there which demonstrates a correlation between mental health problems and amount of social media use. So I'm staying away again.
I've learned to keep my thoughts and emotions in check now, but it has been really hard these last few days. The girl I liked I work, I don't even really like anymore, so that was just a bit of lustful crush which has gone away now. I keep my mind and my eyes away from here now (and away from other girls too). I still don't feel anywhere near recovered/healed, and I know that an addiction recovery process takes a long time so I'm just going to keep going and try and stay strong. I was so close to relapsing recently, very, very close. The urges can be extremely strong. And so I'm going back to my original plan and I'm sticking to it for good from now on: No wasting time browsing on the internet, No social media, No wasting time watching TV/movies.
I'm still eating healthy and exercising regularly, but there is only so much exercise you can do until you feel exhausted and depressed due to overtraining so I suggest for people not to go too crazy on excessive excercise. There needs to be a balance in everything you. When aspects of your life are unbalanced, that's when your mood deteriorates. There can certainly be too much of a good thing; even too much sex with your girlfriend can leave you irritaed, stressed, anxious, fatigued, brain fogged. It is a common misconception that if you find a spouse, then everything will be ok because you would not need to use porn anymore because you would have an outlet for your sexual energy. But this is very wrong. There are countless stories, journals and articles out there which show that getting into a relationship while you are a lustful sexual freak - or porn addict - will eventually bring the relationship to problems. Your addiction would still be there and it would still need feeding, and men resort to hiding behind their spouses back, lying and acting out in their perverse ways. There's too many people out there hiding their porn addictions from their girlfriends, the evidence is in many of the journals. I myself was in a relationship with a girl who I eventually lost interest in and didn't find her attractive anymore, I didn't respect her like I should have done and this was due to all the videos and images I was putting into my addicted brain. In bed with her, I even had to close my eyes sometimes and bring up some of those perverse scenes in order to do the deed. Thinking about it now, she was a great person, we could have been really happy together, but my mind was elsewhere and it's too late now...
Cold showers have helped me cool down the urges, raise my moods and divert my thoughts. They've been a really big help and I highly recommend them. Not warm showers, not slightly cold, but really cold. Go and do it now, have a quick cold shower and see how much your mood improves due to the shock of the cold water. It's great for your health too. There are many benefits from cold showers, but the ones I found most effective for my reboot is the benefit of relieving depression, raising energy levels, improving focus and concetration. Mind you, the effect is not very long lasting, but you can have as many cold showers in a day as you want! And over time, as your addiction becomes weaker, the cold water treatment should help you to feel better and more energetic for the long term. So next time you're feeling like crap and you can't get those lusty thoughts out of your head, go have a quick cold splash and then sit down to read a book or do something else that's productive.
So, in conclusion, that is how it has been these last few days, I've been feeling shit and my motivation has dropped back down to nil, to wanting to just lay in bed or on the sofa all day: not good. I believe the things that have brought me back down to such a depressing level are dating sites, sexual thoughts, fantasising, Facebook and TV. I was extremely close to acting out by watching porn again and I was seriously starting to doubt that there is any real benefits to sexual abstinence. This was wrong thinking, this was the addiction trying to convince me again with it's lies. I have tried to concentrate on just getting through the day and telling myself that maybe tomorrow I will feel better. People, focus on just getting another clean day in and don't think too far into the future because that is a sure way to lose hope and fail. And don't beat yourselves up too much about what has been in the past, and don't get lowspirited about the things you don't have in life because that is also a sure way to fail. Leave the past and the future with The Creator, be grateful for your lot in life and focus on today and what you can do to improve your life today. I've pushed through these last few struggles and I'm so glad I didn't give in, that would have been a long streak down the drain and a lot of progress lost. And today I'm feeling rather positive and optimistic, a little more energetic, and my motivation levels have come back up again.
Peace