Do or Die

S

Stiffy

Active Member
This time, there?s not a choice with my mindset.

Things have again spiraled out of control. Previously until this past year I was able to continue on without much of a conscience if I wanted, this is not possible now. Even in the middle of the act I question what I?m doing and have thoughts leading to stopping. This makes it even harder on my psyche.

I just finished and I?m disgusted. This habit warps my mind. I will post here every day that I have the capability. Unless I?m out camping or something, consider that a commitment.
 
A

achilles heel

Well-Known Member
Consistency is the key: Now matter how many times you fall, you need to get up once more. Learn from your relapses and avoid the situations that lead to them. You have all the support on here and can overcome this!  :)
 
S

Stiffy

Active Member
After deep reflection, I?ve cut out a substance dependancy from my life that I believe was causing a huge problem of depression. Not sure if you guys have heard of Kratom, but I?ve been using it fairly consistently for about a year. I?m 3 days off of it today. I feel mentally so much better and more positive about my future. No sense of helplessness and artificial feel good feeling while watching my life spiral out of control. I believe this combined with no PMO will push me to be better.
24 hours w/o PMO now. 3 days without Kratom.
 
M

mjery

Member
Dear Stiffy,

I think that you need to make some modifications, else your courage will subside. Make some small changes, if you do not work out, start by only 5 minutes a day. If you do not spend time with friends, organize an awkward meeting!!!!! If you eat sweets, just reduce it by 5 percent.

These small actions will keep your courage alive.
Believe me, sudden feelings just result in short-term results.

Wish you luck.
 
S

Stiffy

Active Member
I think I?m miscalculating my time for it to be shorter than it actually is. But I?ll just stick with what I?ve got. Regardless, I?ve edged today but realized what I was doing and discontinued. I think with these sleepless nights initially being off the sedative of a drug kratom is, I?ll have to fight harder.

3 days no PMO. Coming up on 6 days off Kratom.

Honestly right now detoxing and staying off of kratom is my top priority. Though they are both very important, the pressing issue is the drugs.

I honestly had the best day today that I?ve had in months and months.

I?m excited and am seeing light instead of pure darkness.
 
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