Mediadude20
Member
Something fairly profound happened me last night. As I was lying awake I got a sudden vivid reminder about an old pocket-sized notebook that I put together approx 10 years ago. I used this notebook as a handy review journal to remind myself about why I was turning away from porn and choosing a life of purity and fullness rather than secrets & shame. I would read the points in this journal everyday and it would help.
When I got tired of fighting the battle I hid the notebook somewhere and I had no idea where I even left it. Then my brain did this weird and wonderful thing and just spoke to me like a voice saying "Try looking behind the bookshelf". Then I woke up today and checked....sure enough, I had hid it there years ago.
I was encouraged by this memory because it was like something from the deepest core of my being saying "I want you to read what you wrote in that notebook and start following it again. I want you to strive again, I want you to be well again." And my brain was agreeing with this thought by saying "Yep. Let's fix me"
I want to share with you all what I had written in that pocket journal years ago as it might be helpful to others. In no particular order, here are the reasons I listed for staying away from PMO.
[list type=decimal]
[*]I want to become the sort of man I can honestly respect.
[*]I'm tired of lying, hiding and covering up.
[*]I want to be in control of my body and mind.
[*]I don't want to support an industry that is abusive to women and men.
[*]I don't want to feed an addiction that is arguably stronger than heroin & cocaine.
[*]If I keep looking at porn I will never be free.
[*]I want freedom!
[*]I don't want to wake up at the age of 50/60/70 and still be doing this.
[*]I don't want to have wasted this life that God gave me, not fulfilling the real purposes meant for me.
[*]I want to feel better about myself, have a better character, be more confident, have more self-esteem.
[*]I want to become the man that I was destined to be for my future wife and kids.
[*]I want to be pure and help others achieve purity.
[*]I want to treat women with the respect that they deserve.
[*]Life was suppose to be lived away from all of this shit!
[*]I want to live a life of gratitude & appreciation, and intimacy with my creator.
[/list]
So there it is guys.... A solid reminder from a 10 year old journal. Like a "ping" from a black box recorder of a lost old plane wreck. Time to pick up the pieces.
When I got tired of fighting the battle I hid the notebook somewhere and I had no idea where I even left it. Then my brain did this weird and wonderful thing and just spoke to me like a voice saying "Try looking behind the bookshelf". Then I woke up today and checked....sure enough, I had hid it there years ago.
I was encouraged by this memory because it was like something from the deepest core of my being saying "I want you to read what you wrote in that notebook and start following it again. I want you to strive again, I want you to be well again." And my brain was agreeing with this thought by saying "Yep. Let's fix me"
I want to share with you all what I had written in that pocket journal years ago as it might be helpful to others. In no particular order, here are the reasons I listed for staying away from PMO.
[list type=decimal]
[*]I want to become the sort of man I can honestly respect.
[*]I'm tired of lying, hiding and covering up.
[*]I want to be in control of my body and mind.
[*]I don't want to support an industry that is abusive to women and men.
[*]I don't want to feed an addiction that is arguably stronger than heroin & cocaine.
[*]If I keep looking at porn I will never be free.
[*]I want freedom!
[*]I don't want to wake up at the age of 50/60/70 and still be doing this.
[*]I don't want to have wasted this life that God gave me, not fulfilling the real purposes meant for me.
[*]I want to feel better about myself, have a better character, be more confident, have more self-esteem.
[*]I want to become the man that I was destined to be for my future wife and kids.
[*]I want to be pure and help others achieve purity.
[*]I want to treat women with the respect that they deserve.
[*]Life was suppose to be lived away from all of this shit!
[*]I want to live a life of gratitude & appreciation, and intimacy with my creator.
[/list]
So there it is guys.... A solid reminder from a 10 year old journal. Like a "ping" from a black box recorder of a lost old plane wreck. Time to pick up the pieces.