[color=navy]Hi everyone,
I'm new on here and never knew there were online communities with regards to wanting to stop watching pornography.
I've tried stopping so many times and I can go for several weeks without viewing porn and masturbating. But I always end up doing it again and then I feel depressed, dirty and hating myself. I want to stop for good.
I have clinical depression and social anxiety and although I would like to have a relationship (I'm a gay male), having depression and social anxiety prevents me from finding someone. I use pornography to fill that void and it's an artificial means for gratification.
I've tried meeting guys online but they're mostly into one-time sexual encounters and usually very dirty and I'm not ready or willing to do that. And knowing me, I would end up very depressed and guilty. I've only met 2 men online in the past (the last one was around 20 years ago) and it was very vanilla and we only kissed and touched each other.
Whenever I see a good-looking guy/man, I get aroused and often, this leads to fantasizing and eventually leads to porn and masturbation. I always end up feeling bad and guilty for the next few days and up to a week afterwards.
I would like to stop for good. I'm tired of doing the same thing and always feeling so bad. It's like that saying "Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result."
I've read about how to stop porn and masturbation and I know how to stop but my hormones take over me once I start looking at porn and then I can't stop and I masturbate as a result. I feel so bad that afterwards, I shower relentlessly yet still feel so dirty. For days afterward, I still feel so bad :-[
I think I need accountability and that's why I'm here :
Once I stop for good and stay that way, I'm still not ready to meet a guy in person because if it leads to sex, the result will be basically the same, I would feel bad, dirty and guilty. So my first step is to stop porn and masturbating. Please help, thank-you!
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I'm new on here and never knew there were online communities with regards to wanting to stop watching pornography.
I've tried stopping so many times and I can go for several weeks without viewing porn and masturbating. But I always end up doing it again and then I feel depressed, dirty and hating myself. I want to stop for good.
I have clinical depression and social anxiety and although I would like to have a relationship (I'm a gay male), having depression and social anxiety prevents me from finding someone. I use pornography to fill that void and it's an artificial means for gratification.
I've tried meeting guys online but they're mostly into one-time sexual encounters and usually very dirty and I'm not ready or willing to do that. And knowing me, I would end up very depressed and guilty. I've only met 2 men online in the past (the last one was around 20 years ago) and it was very vanilla and we only kissed and touched each other.
Whenever I see a good-looking guy/man, I get aroused and often, this leads to fantasizing and eventually leads to porn and masturbation. I always end up feeling bad and guilty for the next few days and up to a week afterwards.
I would like to stop for good. I'm tired of doing the same thing and always feeling so bad. It's like that saying "Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result."
I've read about how to stop porn and masturbation and I know how to stop but my hormones take over me once I start looking at porn and then I can't stop and I masturbate as a result. I feel so bad that afterwards, I shower relentlessly yet still feel so dirty. For days afterward, I still feel so bad :-[
I think I need accountability and that's why I'm here :
Once I stop for good and stay that way, I'm still not ready to meet a guy in person because if it leads to sex, the result will be basically the same, I would feel bad, dirty and guilty. So my first step is to stop porn and masturbating. Please help, thank-you!
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