HumaNature
Member
Day 2
Decided to get a post a day going on a recovery website to help stay above board during this quarantine.
The What
Initial goal: 1 week no PMO
Secondary goal: 1 month no PMO
Tertiary goal: 3 months no PMO
Final goal: 6 months no PMO
Follow up goals tbd
The How
Daily meditation
Regular exercise (3x per week)
Writing daily as a hobby
Posting here daily as a requirement
Reading other's stories and progress here
Phone and laptop use left only to safe areas IE not the bedroom or bathroom
The Why and Background
I'd like to feel real again. Like a person. With emotions and passions. They're there but watered down by overstimulated reward circuitry. I'm aware it's going to be shitty, and won't be easy. I feel like it's time to complete this challenge and move forward with better footing in my life. So far I've mostly been trying to climb my way up a slippery slope and I've been eeking out victories only to slide back down some of what I climbed. It's gotten old, I've gotten tired of it, and really there isn't much reward to watching porn for me any longer. Not that there really was reward before, but it felt different. Despite it leaving me hollow I was still under it's spell before. I've snapped out of it largely but now I need to trudge up the neuropathway I set in motion for years and not succomb to pitfalls. I know a good amount of my trigger points but that only goes so far without discipline and activities to keep me busy. In a week I'll be straining some, in a month I'll have daily difficulty for a week or two, then after that I'm not sure what'll happen and I'm worried it'll be too hard. Won't stop me from trying, but still the worry is there.
I'm in my upper twenties and have been trying to quit porn and sexually addictive behavior for a number of years. I've had good runs before but none were like how things are now. It's just different. I feel I have a real shot at this but I'm not fooled that it will be easy.
Thanks for taking the time to read.
-HumaNature
Decided to get a post a day going on a recovery website to help stay above board during this quarantine.
The What
Initial goal: 1 week no PMO
Secondary goal: 1 month no PMO
Tertiary goal: 3 months no PMO
Final goal: 6 months no PMO
Follow up goals tbd
The How
Daily meditation
Regular exercise (3x per week)
Writing daily as a hobby
Posting here daily as a requirement
Reading other's stories and progress here
Phone and laptop use left only to safe areas IE not the bedroom or bathroom
The Why and Background
I'd like to feel real again. Like a person. With emotions and passions. They're there but watered down by overstimulated reward circuitry. I'm aware it's going to be shitty, and won't be easy. I feel like it's time to complete this challenge and move forward with better footing in my life. So far I've mostly been trying to climb my way up a slippery slope and I've been eeking out victories only to slide back down some of what I climbed. It's gotten old, I've gotten tired of it, and really there isn't much reward to watching porn for me any longer. Not that there really was reward before, but it felt different. Despite it leaving me hollow I was still under it's spell before. I've snapped out of it largely but now I need to trudge up the neuropathway I set in motion for years and not succomb to pitfalls. I know a good amount of my trigger points but that only goes so far without discipline and activities to keep me busy. In a week I'll be straining some, in a month I'll have daily difficulty for a week or two, then after that I'm not sure what'll happen and I'm worried it'll be too hard. Won't stop me from trying, but still the worry is there.
I'm in my upper twenties and have been trying to quit porn and sexually addictive behavior for a number of years. I've had good runs before but none were like how things are now. It's just different. I feel I have a real shot at this but I'm not fooled that it will be easy.
Thanks for taking the time to read.
-HumaNature