Overcoming hypofrontality

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suprastim

Member
29 year old male, giving some background on my P usage in the past.

At the age of 13 or 14 I became aware you could look at naked women on the internent. Thankfully I didn't have my own computer. Then at the age of 15 or 16 I got a smartphone and occasionally looked at P. Thankfully I didn't have the money for sustained usage as it cost a lot of phone credit.

Only at 19 when I went to uni did I start to watch P frequently, when I had my own computer. I never had a huge problem with P, nor did I ever have sustained PIED, but I felt it negatively affected my S life and the way I saw sexual partners and the way I saw women.

I would say my P usage might go from 3x on a very bad day eg with a hangover, to once a week, on average, over the years. I never really watched anything too bizarre but definitely a few questionable things for the novelty, nor did I do any very long edging sessions, but I believe it wasn't uncommon for me to watch for 30 mins, which isn't as bad as I have seen.

I never paid for P. I noticed I compulsively used dating apps just to look at women and I found myself following women on insta just to look at them. It didn't seem healthy and this spill over into my 'normal' life made me feel guilty. A couple of months ago I identified this as a problem and unfollowed some women on insta and twitter. Over the last few months I stopped using P informally, and then would just look at rauncy pages online or on insta,m in order to tone things down. But I didn't impose strict rules and so I would cave after a couple of weeks. I believe however that his will help me now that I'm officially and formally quitting P, that this lead-in period will soften the blow.

So I'm hoping to get rid of P and all the other silly habits. Hope you enjoy the journey.
 
S

suprastim

Member
Should have mentioned, I had a dream last night about watching porn. Really strange. Then in the dream afterwards I felt guilty about having watched it. The detail in the dream was graphic.

After waking up and realising I hadn't watched porn I felt a fair bit if relief
 
AStansfield

AStansfield

Active Member
Happened to me twice in the past few weeks. I would say it's common to have these kind of dreams in the initial stages of rebooting.
 
Gabe Deem

Gabe Deem

Administrator
Staff member
Admin
Moderator
My advice would be to not "overthink" dreams, as sometimes they are a completely random mixture of stuff you've had on your mind. Just keep trucking one day at a time.

If you haven't seen it yet, I made a video about porn dreams/wet dreams a while back you may find helpful: https://youtu.be/092UH6e0BWA
 
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suprastim

Member
Thanks AStansfield and Gabe, the video was great.

Feeling good. Yesterday was probably the strongest day of M cravings, but nothing too bad.

Today I unfollowed a twitter account which posts pics of erotic art. I genuinely like the art and I don't think it would lead me to cave in to my urges, but I suspect it wasn't good for my dopaminergic system, seeing those eroticised images on my feed. I will continue to unfollow anything else similar that comes up in my feed, following on from the 'if it aint real, no deal' school of thought.
 
S

suprastim

Member
Still going strong.

I unfollowed an instagram account that is ostensibly a female fashion website but I was only following it for the women.

I have read on here about men being afraid they have become creeps and how they noticed their eye looks for the dopamine hit when out and about by looking at women and I have seen that in myself, too. So I'm trying to deprive the brain of that dopamine.

I also uninstalled all my dating apps, tinder etc, but then briefly reinstalled last night when there was a power outage. I feel there is an element of voyeurism there too. I'll uninstall again this evening. It's under control.

Nil else to report. I kinda want a wet dream, I've never had one. Overall, I feel a bit better.

PS, can a mod change the title of the thread so that it says July 25 instead of August 25
 
AStansfield

AStansfield

Active Member
Go to your first post and click "modify" to change the subject of the thread.

Getting rid of influences like Facebook, Instagram,  and Dating Apps plus avoiding racey content on youtube will go a long way in helping you achieve your goal.

I've been completely social media free for the past month and it's been a blessing!
 
S

suprastim

Member
AStansfield said:
Go to your first post and click "modify" to change the subject of the thread.

Getting rid of influences like Facebook, Instagram,  and Dating Apps plus avoiding racey content on youtube will go a long way in helping you achieve your goal.

I've been completely social media free for the past month and it's been a blessing!
Click to expand...

Great! I might meet instagram entirely. One issue I have with removing it is I know it helps me to meet women.

So brothers my ex text me today. We've been going back and forth. But I have zero cravings!!
 
S

suprastim

Member
Lot of urges today, moderate urges to M.

It's a Saturday and we played a soccer match and this often is a trigger for me, to come home and shower and M in the shower.

The P urges aren't really strong, moreso just M.

I unfollowed another raunchy account on instagram. Well, not really raunchy, just some dumb ass broad with assets that shows them off. I've reinstalled tinder again temporarily, too.

All good. I think I'm at low risk of succumbing to urges but they're definitely the strongest thus far.

EDIT: I started this journey to get off P, so if I do M, it's not a big deal. No fap is a bonus for me. But I'm still going to take it as far as I can
 
S

suprastim

Member
Bit of MW for me this morning. I'm not sure how unusual that was as I haven't been majorly tracking but I think it's a bit new for me
 
S

suprastim

Member
Have a hangover so the cravings are very strong to M today. Hopefully I'll overcome. No desire to watch P but I am having flashbacks to certain scenes - does anyone know a way to 'forget' these?
 
S

suprastim

Member
D23 no M, D28 no P

Reasonably strong M urges, no P urges really. Getting reasonably frequent flashbacks from a particular scene.

I was reflecting today on why I'm doing no M as well as no P, at least initially, on why it's recommended.

I assume it's for 2 reasons.
1. The risk of relapsing into P during M or as a result of the chaser effect
2. The likelihood of fantasising unhealthily or inappropriately during M, as a result of P still being in one's mind, and this could impair rewiring
 
S

suprastim

Member
D24 no M, D29 no P

Felt really weird today and yesterday. I can't figure out if I'm flat lining or if I'm just taking ages to recover from a bad hangover, which isn't unusual for me.

My energy levels are extremely low and I just had a nap. I'm not having strong urges, which is good, but yesterday was a pretty tricky day with urges. There was a moment in the shower when I was erect and I considered M; thankfully I got over it.

EDIT 1: I updated the first post to provide more detail
EDIT 2: I have 2 weeks coming up off work, I'm not sure if this will be good or bad for quitting M and P
 
S

suprastim

Member
D25 no M, D30 no P

Feeling good. Decided yesterday wasn't a flatline, am tired but definitely horny. Looking forward to the weekend and two weeks of holidays
 
A

avi

Member
Hey suprastim,

Nice to have you on this journey with the rest of us. Any initiative taken to reduce hyper stimuli in your environment is definitely bound to help improve your life. Read through your posts and if I understood it correctly then your mind seems to have a coupling for shower and M. For some people it might be their couch and M or for others their phone, being tired and M. If you can uncouple any of the systems that together making you want to watch P or M then it might help you, especially when you are tired and your pre-frontal cortex is not engaging as much. Either way, good luck! Rooting for your success!
 
S

suprastim

Member
Hi avi,

Yes, you're absolutely right, my mind does strongly connect the shower with M, that's a very astute observation. Realising this, in and of itself, has been very helpful to me. I have other triggers too, eg after working on my laptop, getting tired on my laptop, and using my phone in bed morning and night.
 
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