PositiveMentalState
Member
Whats up Reboot Nation? I'm Mike & I'm a 24 year old dude living in beautiful Colorado. I've been watching porn since I was 14, and began to realize it was a real problem about a year ago. I started noticing that I could only achieve a full erection when I was viewing pornography, & only a semi erection when I was with real girls. Which is extremely embarrassing. There were times in my life where I questioned my sexuality because of this, even though I knew I was straight. I've had ED for a few years now, and I honestly never thought that PMO had anything to do with it until recently. (I've lost count of the number of times I have failed to perform with girls. I always blamed it on "whiskey-dick", anxiety, or the girl not doing enough to turn me on. This repeated failure lead me into depression and a fear of becoming intimate with new girls. I always dread the thought of having to provide excuses to why I can't get it up.) So, After extensive amounts of "googleing" what could possibly be wrong with me, it became clear that I had a real problem with porn. I began to expect and demand unreasonable things from girls in real life, because it's what I was used to watching in porn everyday. I had desensitized myself so much over the years, that I couldn't be satisfied by anything other than extreme genres or porn. I finally am able to admit that it's a real problem, that I must overcome if I ever want to maintain a healthy relationship and lead a happy normal life. So late last night after watching Gabe Deem's videos, discovering this forum, and some other great support websites, I decided to begin my reboot journey. Today is Day 1 and so far so good. I've committed to my decision to change and I'm ready to fight for it. I'm ready to begin my new life without porn. I'm ready to respect women, and stop viewing them as sex objects. I'm ready stop being ashamed of my ED. I'm ready to experience genuine happiness. I'm working on a list of short term and long term goals for myself. I went through my instagram account today and "unfollowed" every girl that I don't know in real life, who I only followed so I could fantasize about (mostly SuicideGirl models and porn actresses). Doesn't seem like much but it felt good, and I'm ready to make more positive changes like this. My first goal is to join a gym and start working out again, I seem to have lost interest in so many things in life. I'm ready to move forward.
