mattmatt1998
Member
(SHORT WEEKLY UPDATES SHOWN BELOW)
My name is Matt (23) and I am on day 6 of quitting PMO. I plan to quit PM forever and only O with women. I write this to document my journey and give you all a little insight into my struggle. Let me give you some background...
I was a very shy and sensitive child with a fairly limited set of friends and a crippling fear of strangers (particularly girls). At the age of 10 I started masturbating. I never used P and I remember being able to O within a minute using only touch and no fantasies. By 12 I was using fashion magazines to aid my masturbation. I used to be completely satisfied looking at the models faces/legs and never fantasied about being dirty with them.
Everything changed when I moved school at the age of 13. I found a really close group of friends and my confidence went through the roof. My performance at school improved and I slowly but surely gained the ability to talk to women. Everything was looking up. Unfortunately, I had found out how to watch internet P on my iPod and laptop. At this stage I was only watching fairly softcore P, but over time my tastes changed and the intensity of the P increased. I wasn't watching anything weird, but the genres expanded and actresses became louder and more sexy.
I lost my virginity at the age of 16 to a fairly pretty girl. She found the experience uncomfortable as she was a virgin too, so the sex didn't last long. However, a week or so later we slept together again and I quickly realised I was completely unable to O with a woman without awkwardly finishing myself off next to her. I assumed this was down to nerves and thought nothing of it. I was not sexually active for the next couple of years but I was using P a lot, which I knew wasn't good for me. In fact, I "quit" P several times only to relapse a couple of days to a couple of weeks later.
I got a job and left home at the age of 19. I soon slept with another woman who also happened to be a virgin. Once again the sex didn't last and the experience left us both disappointed. I started wondering why my penis was so unsensitive but again told myself it was down to nerves & alcohol, and also the fact that she wasn't very pretty and the sex didn't last a very long time. It was at this stage my P preferences became more unusual, dominant and misogynistic.
Towards the end of my 19th year I met a beautiful woman and started going out with her. It was a very sexual relationship based on mutual attraction and lots of alcohol. We slept together often and she seemed okay about my DE. However, she was not... after sex one evening she started to cry, telling me about how inadequate she felt and how she was worried about not being tight or pretty enough for me. This made me very upset and I explained my issue in more detail saying how I was unable to O during all sex and it wasn't just her. After this she started making a greater effort to make me O. She stepped up the foreplay/dirty talk, stopped me using condoms, and encouraged me to be more dominant. Depressingly, none of this helped. I remember we used to spend nearly an hour every time trying to make me O, but it was no use despite our huge effort and her devoted support. After a couple of months she decided to go travelling for 3 weeks. During this time I decided to quit PMO to see if it helped. When she returned the chemistry had changed. We were actually quite awkward around each other. Despite this, we slept together and I was unfortunately unable to O. She dumped me soon after and I returned to PMO.
Oddly, I didn't worry about my DE as much as I should have. I was happy with P and was proud about how long I could last in bed. I assumed women would prefer me with DE. Over the next few years I had occasional one night stands, but nothing long-term. A couple of weeks ago I first experienced ED. I think this was due to watching increasingly shocking porn. This lead me to Reboot Nation, Noah B.E. Church, and YourBrainOnPorn.com. I quickly decided to try and cure my DE/ED by quitting PMO for 90 days and I am now 6 days in. I will report back tomorrow and every week to update you all on how it's going.
Thank you,
Matt
My name is Matt (23) and I am on day 6 of quitting PMO. I plan to quit PM forever and only O with women. I write this to document my journey and give you all a little insight into my struggle. Let me give you some background...
I was a very shy and sensitive child with a fairly limited set of friends and a crippling fear of strangers (particularly girls). At the age of 10 I started masturbating. I never used P and I remember being able to O within a minute using only touch and no fantasies. By 12 I was using fashion magazines to aid my masturbation. I used to be completely satisfied looking at the models faces/legs and never fantasied about being dirty with them.
Everything changed when I moved school at the age of 13. I found a really close group of friends and my confidence went through the roof. My performance at school improved and I slowly but surely gained the ability to talk to women. Everything was looking up. Unfortunately, I had found out how to watch internet P on my iPod and laptop. At this stage I was only watching fairly softcore P, but over time my tastes changed and the intensity of the P increased. I wasn't watching anything weird, but the genres expanded and actresses became louder and more sexy.
I lost my virginity at the age of 16 to a fairly pretty girl. She found the experience uncomfortable as she was a virgin too, so the sex didn't last long. However, a week or so later we slept together again and I quickly realised I was completely unable to O with a woman without awkwardly finishing myself off next to her. I assumed this was down to nerves and thought nothing of it. I was not sexually active for the next couple of years but I was using P a lot, which I knew wasn't good for me. In fact, I "quit" P several times only to relapse a couple of days to a couple of weeks later.
I got a job and left home at the age of 19. I soon slept with another woman who also happened to be a virgin. Once again the sex didn't last and the experience left us both disappointed. I started wondering why my penis was so unsensitive but again told myself it was down to nerves & alcohol, and also the fact that she wasn't very pretty and the sex didn't last a very long time. It was at this stage my P preferences became more unusual, dominant and misogynistic.
Towards the end of my 19th year I met a beautiful woman and started going out with her. It was a very sexual relationship based on mutual attraction and lots of alcohol. We slept together often and she seemed okay about my DE. However, she was not... after sex one evening she started to cry, telling me about how inadequate she felt and how she was worried about not being tight or pretty enough for me. This made me very upset and I explained my issue in more detail saying how I was unable to O during all sex and it wasn't just her. After this she started making a greater effort to make me O. She stepped up the foreplay/dirty talk, stopped me using condoms, and encouraged me to be more dominant. Depressingly, none of this helped. I remember we used to spend nearly an hour every time trying to make me O, but it was no use despite our huge effort and her devoted support. After a couple of months she decided to go travelling for 3 weeks. During this time I decided to quit PMO to see if it helped. When she returned the chemistry had changed. We were actually quite awkward around each other. Despite this, we slept together and I was unfortunately unable to O. She dumped me soon after and I returned to PMO.
Oddly, I didn't worry about my DE as much as I should have. I was happy with P and was proud about how long I could last in bed. I assumed women would prefer me with DE. Over the next few years I had occasional one night stands, but nothing long-term. A couple of weeks ago I first experienced ED. I think this was due to watching increasingly shocking porn. This lead me to Reboot Nation, Noah B.E. Church, and YourBrainOnPorn.com. I quickly decided to try and cure my DE/ED by quitting PMO for 90 days and I am now 6 days in. I will report back tomorrow and every week to update you all on how it's going.
Thank you,
Matt
