Seeking Help & Answers

[Thomas Crown]

Hi All,

I'm 32 years old. My infatuation with pornography started at the ripe age of 13. I have been addicted for 20 years. It began with pictures and quickly escalated to softcore pornography on late night television then high-speed internet/smartphone pornography. Like many of you, I could consumed many hours of pornography and masturbated multiple times per day continuously for the majority of the 20 years I've been battling this addiction. I have never had an intimate relationship and am afraid to get involved with a female after what this affliction has done to my body. My PIED has gotten to a point wherein I am unable to get an erection even whilst watching P, and at this point can only get a semi-erection with touch.

My plan is to quit PMO altogether and refrain from seeking an intimate relationship until I am somewhat cured. However, I fear I have done too much damage and am incurable! Please help!

 

[Thomas Crown]

You are not incurable, trust me. You are capable of abstaining from P and finding love, it will take time but it will be worth it. I have also never had an intimate relationship and have some fears regarding them, and I have also developed PIED towards P. The PIED will go away for you, as it has done for me.

Hi Rchie,

Have you had a similar experience to mine? How long have you abstained? What are your results this far? I'm terrified that I am doomed.

 

[Thomas Crown]

I had a gradual escalation of P content that started when I was 12, so there are some parallels (but I should note that I am 10 years younger than you). I'm on Day 40 of No PMO, my record is 54 days. I have experienced quite a lot of positive results, including: PIED gone and spontaneous erections + morning wood being more common and stronger, higher sense of empathy/awareness/energy/self-worth, more interest in non-P things, and I feel more attraction and respect towards women. You are not doomed, check out the Success Stories section on this site for confirmation of my claim and inspiration for yourself.

Hey Rchie,

Thanks for the encouraging words! I haven't M'd for 48 hours, did view some P to see if I'd get an erection earlier in the day and was totally freaked out when nothing happened. I will stay on course and hope my situation clears up. I will read the success stories! Congrats on 40 days cannot wait to make it there myself. Quick question, how do you get the counter in your signature?

 

[Bouncingback2]

Hey Thomas Crown

Congratulations on the start of your no-Pmo journey , I wanted to reply back as our stories are very similar, and thought maybe it might help encourage you or something. Plus I think you really hit the nail on the head by saying infatuation! As I feel the same, I’m not just addicted to porn, I’m infatuated with it.

I’m 33 , been addicted to porn and masturbating, since about 12, and I’m currently on day 5 of no-pmo. I started as well with late night soft core Tv and one or two soft core porn magazines (I somehow managed to get hold of). However that all changed when my family replaced our old ancient 90’s style computer with an modern fast speed Microsoft one , I was about 15 . I would sneakily watch porn when everyone was in bed, so was masturbating to porn about 2/4 times a week I would say. But I suppose the addiction hit its heights in my twenties when I got my first I-phone and could view porn as much as I wanted and in privacy. Not sure if this is kinda similar to your experience or not Thomas crown ? Anyways one big difference is I am a gay guy , so I hope you don’t mind me messaging and comparing our stories.

I’ve had a couple of partners but never managed to make it over a year , and it’s all because of this stupid addiction and problems it caused with my erections, so I do feel in a way I’ve never had a relationship as was never really in love and would rather watch porn 5 times a day than be with them , and it wasn’t intimate at all, it was more for companionship as I was lonely. I feel in the same boat too, to be honest that I am doomed and will never have an actual functional, serious and healthy relationship, but only if I carry on using porn , I’m faithful this will work if I really stick to it, and not just stick to it really Chuck myself into it (change of diet, exercise, reading more, getting a hobby etc) , have you tried watching and reading as much information as you can about this addiction ? That could really help encourage you and give insight to this addiction.

One thing that is helping me is , I really didn’t realise until about day 2 of no-pmo that I’ve had this addiction for over 20 years ! I just kept repeating it to myself as it shocked and disgusted me at first, as I really didn’t think it had been twenty years!!! , and now it’s helped if just I keep reminding myself , “you’ve been addicted 20 years !!” Like do you really wanna make it 30 years ? And I’m kinda use this as like a mantra of sorts now on myself. So maybe keep reminding your self just how long this addiction has had a hold of you, and it might help, but that’s just me lol .

Anyways sorry for waffling on, but stick with it Thomas crown there is no better alternative and going back to our old habits and lifestyle is a bad option. You can do this man !!!

 

[Thomas Crown]

Hey Thomas Crown

Congratulations on the start of your no-Pmo journey , I wanted to reply back as our stories are very similar, and thought maybe it might help encourage you or something. Plus I think you really hit the nail on the head by saying infatuation! As I feel the same, I’m not just addicted to porn, I’m infatuated with it.

I’m 33 , been addicted to porn and masturbating, since about 12, and I’m currently on day 5 of no-pmo. I started as well with late night soft core Tv and one or two soft core porn magazines (I somehow managed to get hold of). However that all changed when my family replaced our old ancient 90’s style computer with an modern fast speed Microsoft one , I was about 15 . I would sneakily watch porn when everyone was in bed, so was masturbating to porn about 2/4 times a week I would say. But I suppose the addiction hit its heights in my twenties when I got my first I-phone and could view porn as much as I wanted and in privacy. Not sure if this is kinda similar to your experience or not Thomas crown ? Anyways one big difference is I am a gay guy , so I hope you don’t mind me messaging and comparing our stories.

I’ve had a couple of partners but never managed to make it over a year , and it’s all because of this stupid addiction and problems it caused with my erections, so I do feel in a way I’ve never had a relationship as was never really in love and would rather watch porn 5 times a day than be with them , and it wasn’t intimate at all, it was more for companionship as I was lonely. I feel in the same boat too, to be honest that I am doomed and will never have an actual functional, serious and healthy relationship, but only if I carry on using porn , I’m faithful this will work if I really stick to it, and not just stick to it really Chuck myself into it (change of diet, exercise, reading more, getting a hobby etc) , have you tried watching and reading as much information as you can about this addiction ? That could really help encourage you and give insight to this addiction.

One thing that is helping me is , I really didn’t realise until about day 2 of no-pmo that I’ve had this addiction for over 20 years ! I just kept repeating it to myself as it shocked and disgusted me at first, as I really didn’t think it had been twenty years!!! , and now it’s helped if just I keep reminding myself , “you’ve been addicted 20 years !!” Like do you really wanna make it 30 years ? And I’m kinda use this as like a mantra of sorts now on myself. So maybe keep reminding your self just how long this addiction has had a hold of you, and it might help, but that’s just me lol .

Anyways sorry for waffling on, but stick with it Thomas crown there is no better alternative and going back to our old habits and lifestyle is a bad option. You can do this man !!!

Hi Bouncingback,

Thanks for the reply, it's comforting knowing I'm not alone. This is a crippling disease, one I am determined to overcome. Given I have not had an intimate relationship I find myself turned on by almost all females it's like my body wants to have an erection/sex but just can't almost as if my D is exhausted. I suppose 20 years of multiple M sessions per day/hour will do that to guy. I'm hoping I can cure myself (time will tell). In the short time I've refrained from PMO I find myself constantly fantasizing about sex be it with women I see in a grocery store or on television but nothing crazy. My porn habits didn't really escalate beyond anal/dp. Also I'm not really sure what that means in terms of my sex drive or libido, maybe refraining from real sexual activity will be my saving grace. Any thoughts on my constant fantasies are welcome. I would love to others experiences with this.

 

[Chrisaaa7]

Hi All,

I'm 32 years old. My infatuation with pornography started at the ripe age of 13. I have been addicted for 20 years. It began with pictures and quickly escalated to softcore pornography on late night television then high-speed internet/smartphone pornography. Like many of you, I could consumed many hours of pornography and masturbated multiple times per day continuously for the majority of the 20 years I've been battling this addiction. I have never had an intimate relationship and am afraid to get involved with a female after what this affliction has done to my body. My PIED has gotten to a point wherein I am unable to get an erection even whilst watching P, and at this point can only get a semi-erection with touch.

My plan is to quit PMO altogether and refrain from seeking an intimate relationship until I am somewhat cured. However, I fear I have done too much damage and am incurable! Please help!

Good luck man, youre definelty curable and you can recover . However due to how long you have watched porn it may take a little longer then the average person but that is perfectly ok. Over time you will see improvement and things will slowly get better. Whatever you do, don’t test by watching porn to see if you can get an erection Bc that will just set you back. Good luck my friend, keep us updated in a few weeks

 

[Thomas Crown]

Good luck man, youre definelty curable and you can recover . However due to how long you have watched porn it may take a little longer then the average person but that is perfectly ok. Over time you will see improvement and things will slowly get better. Whatever you do, don’t test by watching porn to see if you can get an erection Bc that will just set you back. Good luck my friend, keep us updated in a few weeks

Hi Chrisaaa7,

Thank you for the encouragement! I'm extremely excited to see results. Any thoughts towards these almost constant fantasies? This is something I seem to struggle with on an hourly basis, literally any female I see I will fantasize about. Will this possibly delay recovery? Thanks in advance!

 

[Chrisaaa7]

Hi Chrisaaa7,

Thank you for the encouragement! I'm extremely excited to see results. Any thoughts towards these almost constant fantasies? This is something I seem to struggle with on an hourly basis, literally any female I see I will fantasize about. Will this possibly delay recovery? Thanks in advance!

That’s normal, it’s still early in your recovery but it will slowly improve. It’ll only slow down your recovery if you’re still doing it heavily in a few weeks. just try your best to keep it to a minimum and you’ll be fine. Don’t overthink it and based if your progress you’ll know what is best for you

 

[Thomas Crown]

That’s normal, it’s still early in your recovery but it will slowly improve. It’ll only slow down your recovery if you’re still doing it heavily in a few weeks. just try your best to keep it to a minimum and you’ll be fine. Don’t overthink it and based if your progress you’ll know what is best for you

Sounds good, I'll do my best to limit the fantasies and work towards eliminating them completely.

 

[Chrisaaa7]

Sounds good, I'll do my best to limit the fantasies and work towards eliminating them completely.

Good luck man, it’s ok to have fantasies sometimes were human it’s normal, don’t overthink it and enjoy the process ! It’s a new life

 

[Thomas Crown]

Day 3 - November 15, 2021

Woke up today with somewhat of an erection after some extremely sexual fantasies while lying in bed. Surprisingly, I did not feel the urge to watch P, I have an overwhelming sense to get better as I yearn for actual female interaction as opposed to pixels on screen. Still going strong despite the fact that I still fantasize constantly throughout the day. Hoping this aspect of my reboot/rewire subsides in the following days. As always all thoughts and comments are welcome, and I appreciate all words of encouragement.

 

[Fappy]

you are definitely NOT incurable! put that dumb arse thought out of your head this instant! if i can be cured, anybody can. i know you dont feel that way now, but trust good ole Fappy on this one.

 

[Thomas Crown]

you are definitely NOT incurable! put that dumb arse thought out of your head this instant! if i can be cured, anybody can. i know you dont feel that way now, but trust good ole Fappy on this one.

Hey Fappy,

That's the plan! I know I've just begun this journey but I'm feeling great thus far. As previously stated, I'm hoping these fantasies subside, but definitely loving my no PMO life now. Was your situation similar to mine? Please share if you do not mind, also thank you for the encouragement it is greatly appreciated.

 

[Fappy]

Yeah you need to enjoy and savor your no pmo life, you can clearly see that life with pmo isn't life at all.
Yeah I'd say mine is similar to yours, maybe even worse. I'm not playing down your struggle, but I was so far gone down the pmo addiction hole you wouldn't believe it. I didn't even know what was wrong with me, I felt like shit all the time and was an arsehole to my partner and pretty much everyone else. The only thing I could enjoy and look forward to was pmo, every single day. Even At work is sneak off to the toilets and rub a quick one out while looking at my phone. At department stores as well, I'd get triggered then scAn for the nearest toilet that's available to go and jerk it. Evn at family functions I would take my phone into the toilet an jerk to porn. And the way this fucked up my perception of women was night nightmarish... But the worst thing of Al was thati thought this was normal.
How in the fuck is that normal!?
I had pied, anxiety,depression and no interest in anything except pmo. My life was in the toilet.
Then I found this site and this forum. The information here dchanged my life. I cringe when I think about where is be without the reboot knowledge.
So don't despair! You too can be cured of this sickness an live a normal life!

 

[Richard44]

Day 3 - November 15, 2021

Woke up today with somewhat of an erection after some extremely sexual fantasies while lying in bed. Surprisingly, I did not feel the urge to watch P, I have an overwhelming sense to get better as I yearn for actual female interaction as opposed to pixels on screen. Still going strong despite the fact that I still fantasize constantly throughout the day. Hoping this aspect of my reboot/rewire subsides in the following days. As always all thoughts and comments are welcome, and I appreciate all words of encouragement.

Hi Man, Good luck on your Journey! I am currently also rebooting and will never go back to the pixels. I know its hard but try to limit your fantasising. Your brain does not understand the difference between fantasies and porn. So if you keep fantasising about Porn you are essentially watching it and using these neuro pathways that we want to weaken and in the end wanne destroy.

Hopefully this reply was helpfull for you.

 

[Bouncingback2]

Hi Bouncingback,

Thanks for the reply, it's comforting knowing I'm not alone. This is a crippling disease, one I am determined to overcome. Given I have not had an intimate relationship I find myself turned on by almost all females it's like my body wants to have an erection/sex but just can't almost as if my D is exhausted. I suppose 20 years of multiple M sessions per day/hour will do that to guy. I'm hoping I can cure myself (time will tell). In the short time I've refrained from PMO I find myself constantly fantasizing about sex be it with women I see in a grocery store or on television but nothing crazy. My porn habits didn't really escalate beyond anal/dp. Also I'm not really sure what that means in terms of my sex drive or libido, maybe refraining from real sexual activity will be my saving grace. Any thoughts on my constant fantasies are welcome. I would love to others experiences with this.

Hey Thomas crown

I can definitely relate to the being turned on by everyone thing , kinda going through the same , I’ve got a lot of studying and essays to do atm so it’s taking a lot of my time and focus up , (and not by choice ) however when I go to the shops or watch tv I can’t stop thinking sexual thoughts of anyone I see . But like you say it’s because I think we have 20 years of addiction behind us ! But the thoughts go when I really try to preoccupy myself . So not to sound cheesey but maybe Chuck all you’re spair time into something like exercising . Could help reduce the thoughts a bit . I’ve also stopped watching normal films and tv for bit , And watching documentaries instead ,as they tend to be very non- sexual and boring lol basically I think just taking yourself away from anything that might induce sexual thoughts helps . But from everything I’ve read this can be normal to have these constant thoughts, as it’s your brain trying to trick you back into the habit and get its quick fix. and will pass the longer you don’t MPO or Fapp , keep up the good work man you got this !!

 

[Thomas Crown]

Yeah you need to enjoy and savor your no pmo life, you can clearly see that life with pmo isn't life at all.
Yeah I'd say mine is similar to yours, maybe even worse. I'm not playing down your struggle, but I was so far gone down the pmo addiction hole you wouldn't believe it. I didn't even know what was wrong with me, I felt like shit all the time and was an arsehole to my partner and pretty much everyone else. The only thing I could enjoy and look forward to was pmo, every single day. Even At work is sneak off to the toilets and rub a quick one out while looking at my phone. At department stores as well, I'd get triggered then scAn for the nearest toilet that's available to go and jerk it. Evn at family functions I would take my phone into the toilet an jerk to porn. And the way this fucked up my perception of women was night nightmarish... But the worst thing of Al was thati thought this was normal.
How in the fuck is that normal!?
I had pied, anxiety,depression and no interest in anything except pmo. My life was in the toilet.
Then I found this site and this forum. The information here dchanged my life. I cringe when I think about where is be without the reboot knowledge.
So don't despair! You too can be cured of this sickness an live a normal life!

Hi Fappy,

Yes, this sounds alot like me actually! Except, I would keep from going out and usually retreat to the privacy of my room to PMO almost every night. I do believe I have a messed up perception of women as well, hence the constant incredibly hper-sexual fantasies. How long did you struggle with PMO? My struggle has been 20 years, over half of my life, so long I don't even remember what my life prior to PMO was like but I'm excited to find out. Day 4 and going strong....I'm determined to beat this thing.

 

[Thomas Crown]

Hi Man, Good luck on your Journey! I am currently also rebooting and will never go back to the pixels. I know its hard but try to limit your fantasising. Your brain does not understand the difference between fantasies and porn. So if you keep fantasising about Porn you are essentially watching it and using these neuro pathways that we want to weaken and in the end wanne destroy.

Hopefully this reply was helpfull for you.

Hey Richard,

The reply was extremely helpful, currently working on reducing my fantasies just finding it difficult when every woman I see turns me on. That said, I am getting better at putting an abrupt end to these thoughts when they occur in most instances. Nonetheless, like you, I will never go back to pixels on a screen. Stay strong, let's beat this thing!

 

[Thomas Crown]

Hey Thomas crown

I can definitely relate to the being turned on by everyone thing , kinda going through the same , I’ve got a lot of studying and essays to do atm so it’s taking a lot of my time and focus up , (and not by choice ) however when I go to the shops or watch tv I can’t stop thinking sexual thoughts of anyone I see . But like you say it’s because I think we have 20 years of addiction behind us ! But the thoughts go when I really try to preoccupy myself . So not to sound cheesey but maybe Chuck all you’re spair time into something like exercising . Could help reduce the thoughts a bit . I’ve also stopped watching normal films and tv for bit , And watching documentaries instead ,as they tend to be very non- sexual and boring lol basically I think just taking yourself away from anything that might induce sexual thoughts helps . But from everything I’ve read this can be normal to have these constant thoughts, as it’s your brain trying to trick you back into the habit and get its quick fix. and will pass the longer you don’t MPO or Fapp , keep up the good work man you got this !!

Hey Bouncingback2,

Yes, it's a daily struggle controlling these fantasies as my imagination constantly runs wild. I am introducing new daily habits into my routine to help subside these thoughts. Thanks for the advice! How is your reboot/rewire going thus far?

 

[Bouncingback2]

Hey Thomas crown

yeah it’s going good thanks, currently on day six , it’s got it’s ups and downs , like keep thinking of sexual thoughts a lot and also having random moments of feeling really anxious out of no where but then goes in 5 minutes, which is a bit odd. Also woke up this morning and I was touching myself , I wasn’t masturbating or anything just really touching myself but completely unaware of it as was asleep , felt bit disgusted with myself, it’s like my and hand have minds of their own. Overall the good is out weighing the bad though. How about you ? How you finding the reboot/ rewire ?