rebootingyogi
Member
Hi everyone
33 y old guy trying to reboot once again after having slipped up badly.
Lost my previous account on this forum so had to create a new one.
Porn addict since 2003 (the year I first got internet connection in my home)
Struggling now for 19 years and counting
Longest steak porn-free: 61 days (last year when I had my final exams)
Prior to this in year 2013 I had achieved a streak of 30 days
After my exams I was free, and relapsed without even thinking what I was doing, sort of autopilot mode. I suspect the stress of exams having disappeared, my brain must have said " Let's party!" and the first thing my brain thought of : Porn!
Today 10th Jan 2022 is my first day of a new reboot cycle, which hopefully I will maintain forever.
Got married last month to a lovely girl, I can get it up to her touch and have orgasms with oral sex but not able to hold an erection long enough (or strong enough) to penetrate her
Not yet told her about my addiction. And I hope I don't have to. I am a typical Indian guy in an arranged marriage with a virgin, sexually inexperienced girl. I myself am sexually inexperienced, having never had a girlfriend before.
My first and only sexual experience, besides usual masturbation and sexual fantasies, is internet porn.
It was in 2013 that I realized for the first time that something is wrong with me. Constantly feeling tired, lifeless, listless, not able to concentrate on studies or work, not able to enjoy the simple pleasures of life.
Then I discovered the YBOP (Your Brain On Porn) website. It was a Matrix moment for me, opening to my eyes to the reality of internet porn, addiction pathways, of the science behind addiction. In that year, I concluded that I have all the symptoms of porn addiction.
But it's not easy at all to let go. Here I am, struggling with multiple reboot-relapse cycles. Struggling with PIED now.
But I have to keep up the struggle. I have to free myself from the Matrix. And I know I will win.
Best of luck and full support to all those, who like me, wish to enjoy a life free from porn.
33 y old guy trying to reboot once again after having slipped up badly.
Lost my previous account on this forum so had to create a new one.
Porn addict since 2003 (the year I first got internet connection in my home)
Struggling now for 19 years and counting
Longest steak porn-free: 61 days (last year when I had my final exams)
Prior to this in year 2013 I had achieved a streak of 30 days
After my exams I was free, and relapsed without even thinking what I was doing, sort of autopilot mode. I suspect the stress of exams having disappeared, my brain must have said " Let's party!" and the first thing my brain thought of : Porn!
Today 10th Jan 2022 is my first day of a new reboot cycle, which hopefully I will maintain forever.
Got married last month to a lovely girl, I can get it up to her touch and have orgasms with oral sex but not able to hold an erection long enough (or strong enough) to penetrate her
Not yet told her about my addiction. And I hope I don't have to. I am a typical Indian guy in an arranged marriage with a virgin, sexually inexperienced girl. I myself am sexually inexperienced, having never had a girlfriend before.
My first and only sexual experience, besides usual masturbation and sexual fantasies, is internet porn.
It was in 2013 that I realized for the first time that something is wrong with me. Constantly feeling tired, lifeless, listless, not able to concentrate on studies or work, not able to enjoy the simple pleasures of life.
Then I discovered the YBOP (Your Brain On Porn) website. It was a Matrix moment for me, opening to my eyes to the reality of internet porn, addiction pathways, of the science behind addiction. In that year, I concluded that I have all the symptoms of porn addiction.
But it's not easy at all to let go. Here I am, struggling with multiple reboot-relapse cycles. Struggling with PIED now.
But I have to keep up the struggle. I have to free myself from the Matrix. And I know I will win.
Best of luck and full support to all those, who like me, wish to enjoy a life free from porn.