reboot_8716
Member
What a ride its been so far!
I wanted to quickly journal out some reflections and observations that I’ve had in the last month that I’ve stopped watching porn, which I hope may be helpful to at least one person. A few things I’ve come to realize:
1. You do not need porn - so much of the struggle of addictions is telling ourselves how much we need it before we even try to give it up.. It can be daunting, and seem damn near impossible to simply acknowledge the obvious - you don’t need to have this thing to live your life or to be happy.
2. If you tell yourself that can’t do this, you probably won’t, but it’s a lie - building on the previous point, the way you talk to yourself matters. If you sit there with a negative talk track in your head that says “I’m no good, I’ll never be able to find happiness, I don’t have the strength it takes to quit porn”, you’re basically admitting defeat before you start.
3. It’s going to be hard at times, but that doesn’t mean you’re not up for the challenge - again to build on the previous point, the way you talk to yourself matters. But you also need to recognize that positive thinking and happy self-talk alone isn’t going to magically make it easy to do. You’re going to have cravings. You’re going to have sexual thoughts. You’re going to think at least a few times about saying ‘screw it, I’ll just go back to watching porn’. If you approach this with dread, fear and anxiety for those moments, you’re going to be much more likely to succumb to the temptation in the moment. If you recognize, and more importantly, accept that these moments will happen and that’s perfectly okay, they will not define you.
In short - don‘t wait to be the person you want to be because you can already be that person, be kind to yourself, and have the humility to appreciate the challenge ahead
I wanted to quickly journal out some reflections and observations that I’ve had in the last month that I’ve stopped watching porn, which I hope may be helpful to at least one person. A few things I’ve come to realize:
1. You do not need porn - so much of the struggle of addictions is telling ourselves how much we need it before we even try to give it up.. It can be daunting, and seem damn near impossible to simply acknowledge the obvious - you don’t need to have this thing to live your life or to be happy.
2. If you tell yourself that can’t do this, you probably won’t, but it’s a lie - building on the previous point, the way you talk to yourself matters. If you sit there with a negative talk track in your head that says “I’m no good, I’ll never be able to find happiness, I don’t have the strength it takes to quit porn”, you’re basically admitting defeat before you start.
3. It’s going to be hard at times, but that doesn’t mean you’re not up for the challenge - again to build on the previous point, the way you talk to yourself matters. But you also need to recognize that positive thinking and happy self-talk alone isn’t going to magically make it easy to do. You’re going to have cravings. You’re going to have sexual thoughts. You’re going to think at least a few times about saying ‘screw it, I’ll just go back to watching porn’. If you approach this with dread, fear and anxiety for those moments, you’re going to be much more likely to succumb to the temptation in the moment. If you recognize, and more importantly, accept that these moments will happen and that’s perfectly okay, they will not define you.
In short - don‘t wait to be the person you want to be because you can already be that person, be kind to yourself, and have the humility to appreciate the challenge ahead
