Hello everyone. I hope you all are doing good,smiling having the best days. I'm here to join you all. My name stays hidden , 24 y/o almost becoming 25 in sep. 2nd year at college from somewhere in Asia. My P journey started with my once "friend" calling me to cybercafe in middle of game showing scandals at the age of around 10/11. It felt like vomiting but as everyone goes through that, i went through too. The M started when i got kind of molested by a somewhat relative that i'll never see again. That was around the age of 13 i guess. from then regular M thing was going on till 16 when i had religious feeling kicked in hard. Tried to stop, been struggling to stop since ever that age. Had pretty good streak here and there and it's just need to be forever now.
i had around 300day streak(my best) which ended couple of months ago.
In my iron will app it showing i'm on 45 day.
and I'M ON MY FLATLINE FOR WEEKS.
i've never experienced flatline before so just wanted to document these days somewhere and got a feel like starting it here.
My only problem, i have a girlfriend, with LDR, we meet once a year(almost) in a cafe to talk for around an hour, but we regularly keep talking on calls and texts.When we talk a bit longer than usual chit chat if any of us say anything a bit further i start to get precum and feel like ejaculating but i've been stopping it for long and i believe I wont let my guard down ever.
Wish i could postpone talking to her till the marriage but this just not being an option. You could guess, conservative place.
first day of journaling and 45th day of without PMO
i had around 7 hours of good sleep. Trying to build the habit of going to bed by 10 and waking up before 5. Kind of working but i took a nap around at 6. Having no junk foods and having fever, cold for around 5 days so can't exercise now. Walked for around 30 minutes and been in sun for quite a while. My semester final exam going on so my focus is currently just there. I got kind of overthinking problem on things so from the youtuber Matt D'Avella i decided to do "if this won't matter after 5 years i won't think about this for more than 5minutes". you know, my PMO thing will definitely matter my entire life, even in hereafter, so it's most important. And then the degrees might matter after more than 5 years and this body of mine will matter till i breathe. So these are all my current focus.
Flatline: for last week or so, my dick seemed complete dead, after waking up from bed today it felt like a little alive, but not rock hard like it always used to be
How can i get better;
i decided to wake up right after my sleep breaks and if its near my wake up time, but due to sickness i thought i can lay a bit more but this is drastically dangerous for the rest of my day as currently i'm having unwanted grogginess. So this ends
i should not stress over every little thing she does, sometime she does thing that bugs up my whole head but which gets alright after couple of weeks, so i'll be keeping my nose into my business.
unless I Need phone for something intentionally, i'll clean my space instead with that free time.
i had around 300day streak(my best) which ended couple of months ago.
In my iron will app it showing i'm on 45 day.
and I'M ON MY FLATLINE FOR WEEKS.
i've never experienced flatline before so just wanted to document these days somewhere and got a feel like starting it here.
My only problem, i have a girlfriend, with LDR, we meet once a year(almost) in a cafe to talk for around an hour, but we regularly keep talking on calls and texts.When we talk a bit longer than usual chit chat if any of us say anything a bit further i start to get precum and feel like ejaculating but i've been stopping it for long and i believe I wont let my guard down ever.
Wish i could postpone talking to her till the marriage but this just not being an option. You could guess, conservative place.
first day of journaling and 45th day of without PMO
i had around 7 hours of good sleep. Trying to build the habit of going to bed by 10 and waking up before 5. Kind of working but i took a nap around at 6. Having no junk foods and having fever, cold for around 5 days so can't exercise now. Walked for around 30 minutes and been in sun for quite a while. My semester final exam going on so my focus is currently just there. I got kind of overthinking problem on things so from the youtuber Matt D'Avella i decided to do "if this won't matter after 5 years i won't think about this for more than 5minutes". you know, my PMO thing will definitely matter my entire life, even in hereafter, so it's most important. And then the degrees might matter after more than 5 years and this body of mine will matter till i breathe. So these are all my current focus.
Flatline: for last week or so, my dick seemed complete dead, after waking up from bed today it felt like a little alive, but not rock hard like it always used to be
How can i get better;
i decided to wake up right after my sleep breaks and if its near my wake up time, but due to sickness i thought i can lay a bit more but this is drastically dangerous for the rest of my day as currently i'm having unwanted grogginess. So this ends
i should not stress over every little thing she does, sometime she does thing that bugs up my whole head but which gets alright after couple of weeks, so i'll be keeping my nose into my business.
unless I Need phone for something intentionally, i'll clean my space instead with that free time.
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