Hi guys. Im in my mid 40's and have been struggling with porn addiction and the resulting porn induced ED for years. I've been trying to break the cycle for a long time but i keep on slipping back to old ways. Im strong fit and healthy and despite me being older that the average guy on here i really shouldn't be having ED issues so im looking for support to finally kick this horrible stupid addiction in to touch once and for all. So im putting my hand in the air and admitting.....I HAVE A PROBLEM. I think the best way for me to get started is to start talking to people. Any help and advice would be gratefully received. Thanks.
Old man coming through!
- Thread starter MrZerox99
- Start date
Beautiful1973
Active Member
Well done on reaching out @MrZerox99 
As an ex partner of a porn addict who had PIED, I fully understand how crippling to 'self' ED can be and the negative affects the addiction can have on your life and relationships.
Porn really is nonsense, it's a fantasy that really adds no value to our lives what so ever.....no one is going to be on their death bed thinking 'gosh I wish I'd watched more Porn'.....said no man ever!!!!
You will get some great advice on here, the guys are really awesome......my only advice as someone on the sidelines, would be to focus on your connections, build healthy connections around you.
Good luck, I look forward to following your journey!
As an ex partner of a porn addict who had PIED, I fully understand how crippling to 'self' ED can be and the negative affects the addiction can have on your life and relationships.
Porn really is nonsense, it's a fantasy that really adds no value to our lives what so ever.....no one is going to be on their death bed thinking 'gosh I wish I'd watched more Porn'.....said no man ever!!!!
You will get some great advice on here, the guys are really awesome......my only advice as someone on the sidelines, would be to focus on your connections, build healthy connections around you.
Good luck, I look forward to following your journey!
Thanks for your words of encouragement @Beautiful1973 I really appreciate it.
Yes you are right! in fact they'll say the opposite " I wish i made better stronger heathier relationships"
I believe i can turn this around. The neural pathways are however very strong so ill need all the help i can get if im to achieve anything anywhere near to a reboot.
Yes you are right! in fact they'll say the opposite " I wish i made better stronger heathier relationships"
I believe i can turn this around. The neural pathways are however very strong so ill need all the help i can get if im to achieve anything anywhere near to a reboot.
Beautiful1973
Active Member
Actually
GBS
Respected Member
Hi @MrZerox99 - ten out of ten for coming here. I hope you read many other journals. I posted mine in the over 40s section (and I am 20 years older than 40, so if it helps you I empathise) and you will read a lot of similar stories in there. We are not all the same but we do have the same goal. Rebooting was one of the greatest things I have ever done. So welcome.
There’s so much to read and understand but the most important thing is to realise you are not alone and we understand your pain. Here’s a starter - look up The Great Porn Experiment (speaker is the genius Gary Wilson) on YouTube. 15 minutes, easy listening, some easy to understand science…..may give you the initial impetus.
I can’t tell you how to stop, because it’s cold turkey. You may need to decide whether you’re going hard mode (so no masturbation at all), but that is the quickest way to change your brain. Keep writing on here, keep telling yourself that the changes you will make are life changing because they are. There will be nasty tricks your brain will play on you to tempt you back. You need to fight them off.
Good luck. We ALL here have your back.
There’s so much to read and understand but the most important thing is to realise you are not alone and we understand your pain. Here’s a starter - look up The Great Porn Experiment (speaker is the genius Gary Wilson) on YouTube. 15 minutes, easy listening, some easy to understand science…..may give you the initial impetus.
I can’t tell you how to stop, because it’s cold turkey. You may need to decide whether you’re going hard mode (so no masturbation at all), but that is the quickest way to change your brain. Keep writing on here, keep telling yourself that the changes you will make are life changing because they are. There will be nasty tricks your brain will play on you to tempt you back. You need to fight them off.
Good luck. We ALL here have your back.
Hi @GBS,
Thanks for your response and thanks for your recommendations. I bought YBOP and other books like Breaking the cycle on Audible about 3 or 4 years ago now if not longer. A lot of the knowledge is already there but i have a good feeling ill acquire a lot more on here. Ive done a few 30 days streaks but largely its every day and its just got to stop. Im here to talk and share my experience and existing knowledge in the hope that it will make a difference for me and hopefully others too. Im hoping that this platform is somewhere that this can happen.
Staying strong is something that i very clearly find difficult to maintain. Even though I haven't seen it as the problem always was, its been a good 15 years or so when i absolutely knew that it was.... and im STILL drawn to it. Its a total shit show really, at my age anyway!!
Its now painfully obvious to me i cant do this alone.
Thanks for your response and thanks for your recommendations. I bought YBOP and other books like Breaking the cycle on Audible about 3 or 4 years ago now if not longer. A lot of the knowledge is already there but i have a good feeling ill acquire a lot more on here. Ive done a few 30 days streaks but largely its every day and its just got to stop. Im here to talk and share my experience and existing knowledge in the hope that it will make a difference for me and hopefully others too. Im hoping that this platform is somewhere that this can happen.
Staying strong is something that i very clearly find difficult to maintain. Even though I haven't seen it as the problem always was, its been a good 15 years or so when i absolutely knew that it was.... and im STILL drawn to it. Its a total shit show really, at my age anyway!!
Its now painfully obvious to me i cant do this alone.