New Member
Hi team,

I'm 37, gay and struggling to embrace a longlasting rest from porn and other unwanted sexual behavior. Porn came into my life when I was 13; I came of age with the internet, so it essentially became my sexual outlet during adolescence and into young adulthood. I only started coming to terms its impace (ED, compulsive watching, a self-soothing tool for work and school-related stress) about 7 years ago. However, it has been a struggle to kick this habit. The pandemic exacerabated my use, and the shift to remote work has been very challenging for me.

I was laid off last April, moved back in with my parents, and while I have a contract job, I'm actively searching for work. Combined with the pandemic and its aftersocks, it's been a temultuous number of years to kick off the porn habit. However, this is also an exciting chapter of new beginnings. I'm embracing the hardship as an opportunity for personal freedom, and the well-being of my finances, mental and sexual health. Over the years, I've done therepy, group work, multiple apps and website blockers, and all throughout trying to practice better mindfulness. This morning, I had a relapse and then I realized my app timer/blocker malfunctioned. Instead of freaking out, I realized its an opportunity to practice mindfulness, meditate and practice relaxed focus. I also thought I'd start my journal today as a way to practice minduflness.

Looking forward to connecting you in this forum.