worth_it
Active Member
Hi all, maybe a few of you remember me from a few years back from my last journal thread. Finding out about RN was one of the most helpful things in my early recovery from porn addiction. For one of the first times, I believed my brain could actually be rewired after years of frequent habitual porn use. I made it to 52 days free from porn, until my streak ended and I haven't made it there since.
I have made it to 30+ a few times since then, but mostly have struggled badly getting any hint of momentum in sobriety. I have experienced a good amount of healing through therapy and my personal faith though, and feel more equipped to understand the "why" behind my addiction. However, at the same time, I think I've developed a low-level depression (probably a flatline symptom) as a result of my continued relapses. This makes it especially hard to live a motivated life, and pursue the sobriety I so badly want. But it's time: I want to have a good life, and sometimes we need to force the issue.
My intention is simple here: I want to journal my progress as I live healthier, and get momentum. I'm having a hard time believing I can actually be free from this, and I think being around other like-minded guys will help me. I want this so damn bad. It's time to start over. Let's get free. Day 0.
I have made it to 30+ a few times since then, but mostly have struggled badly getting any hint of momentum in sobriety. I have experienced a good amount of healing through therapy and my personal faith though, and feel more equipped to understand the "why" behind my addiction. However, at the same time, I think I've developed a low-level depression (probably a flatline symptom) as a result of my continued relapses. This makes it especially hard to live a motivated life, and pursue the sobriety I so badly want. But it's time: I want to have a good life, and sometimes we need to force the issue.
My intention is simple here: I want to journal my progress as I live healthier, and get momentum. I'm having a hard time believing I can actually be free from this, and I think being around other like-minded guys will help me. I want this so damn bad. It's time to start over. Let's get free. Day 0.