PIED all my 23 years, never been able to keep erection for sex. Anyone else?

[EDallmylife]

So this is my story. I just found out about PIED and I might have found the cause to the problem that is ruining my life. If anyone has had a similar story please let me know that Im not the only one and how it "worked out" for you!

I just turned 23. All my teen years I was a gamer and didn't really have any experience with girls at all. I masturbated probably every day and often several times. Usually to porn, since the day I started, around age 12 perhaps. In recent years I have experienced the need to switch to more hardcore stuff that is commonly described when talking about PIED. Stuff I did not initially find arousing at all.

At the embaressing age of 20 I had quit gaming and I was actually able to find a girl. I figured I would finally lose my virginity but even though we tried like 10 times over a 3 week period I was never able to get erect enough to have sex. I blamed alcohol and tried it sober with the same result. I tried blaming it on anxiety cos of the first failed attempt which was due to alcohol but in reality I knew that was not true, I was never that anxious.

I then had another opportunity a few months later with the same result. Since I had not yet found out about PIED I kept on masturbating thinking that I did not have any ED physical problems since I could masturbate to porn.

Now, around 2 years after that I still have the same problem if I manage to get a girl home. Even when I think she's really hot I cant get hard enough. The only time my penis gets even remotely erect is when I fantasize about porn things during the foreplay but that is nowhere near enough to get me erect enough to have sex.

The thing is. I was or am not addicted to porn. Since my last failed attempt with a girl almost 2 weeks ago I have completely stopped watching porn and masturbation. The only reason why I did it was to: 1 Get some temporary satisfaction. 2 Make sure my dick actually worked and pretend like everything was normal.

I remember being able to masturbate without porn or fantasy when I was younger, that got more and more difficult and has for the last few years not been possible without fantasising about pornscenarios.

Im guessing my brain never even "learned" to feel reward from going after real life girls/women and that Im now going to have to reprogram it completely towards this kind of behaviour.

This is what Im doing now:
I have quit masturbating and watching porn. I dont feel like this is a problem at this point (about 10 days in) and dont suspect it will be.
Im feeling what I suppose is the "flatline" where my dick is smaller than ever. My libido is insanely low. Right now I feel like I couldn't even get an erection with porn but Im not going to try that one.
This is what my plan is:
Keep up the reboot, No artificial stimuli but try to flirt, make contact with and sleep with (go home and try to sleep with) real women in order to program my brain to get satisfaction and reward from those things.

If anyone has been through something like this, please let me know that it is possible and any tips / info you might have on what Im in for!
Kind regards EDallmylife!
Would really like to get some feedback on the amount of time/effort I could have in front of me from people with similar stories!

 

[fugu]

Hey friend! I was in a very similar boat as you when I first started. When I was 17, I had a few "successful" but definitely not normal sexual experiences. It would take me FAR too long to get hard, and I was clearly desensitized. I was eventually able to get erect and have pretty normal sex, but I still wouldn't categorize my experiences as normal. In that way, I never had a really good sexual experience growing up.

Don't fret too much about it! I know it's definitely scary to feel that broken, but it sounds like you are more than on the right path. The best thing you can do right now is to start rebooting. I would recommend that you go "hard mode" for the beginning of your reboot period; this means no porn (obviously), no masturbation, and no orgasms. These types of long, complete rests from sexual activity are very, very beneficial to restoring the brain to normal function. It gives the time for the brain to rest and heal. Usually after a longer initial period of abstinence, people start choosing on whether they want to include organs with a potential partner or not. Just depends on how those orgasms make the person feel mentally, emotionally, and physically; if they seem to be slowing recovery, people often opt out of them or limit them severely.

For me personally, I highly recommend going for long stretches of complete physical abstinence. This is when I saw some of the most meaningful recovery. During this time, I was still pursuing a girlfriend, etc, but I was determined to make sure my relationships with girls never involved orgasms until my penis could respond properly. This seems to be a pretty good rule. Other than that, start doing some new stuff...I really liking running and lifting weights. This helped me deal with some of the emotional ups and downs of rebooting while also creating positive self-esteem.

 

[EDallmylife]

Aight! Thanks for your response fugu Yeah Im planning to do more weights and start doing cardio to fill the free time I guess Im going to have during this whole experience and to improve my self-image.

Could you elaborate a bit on your results and how long they took? Like are you more or less completely cured today?
How long did it take for you to be able to perform normally with a partner?
Did you go through the whole flatline thing and how long did it last?

 

[fugu]

Aight! Thanks for your response fugu Yeah Im planning to do more weights and start doing cardio to fill the free time I guess Im going to have during this whole experience and to improve my self-image.

Could you elaborate a bit on your results and how long they took? Like are you more or less completely cured today?
How long did it take for you to be able to perform normally with a partner?
Did you go through the whole flatline thing and how long did it last?

My reboot took a really really long time. I had a really extensive porn history that started when I was young and I used a lot...alot. So...your situation is most likely much better than mine.

I probably flatlined for a solid year. Then, after that year, I was flatlining off and on for a little while. Remember that my condition and situation were BAD, so don't get too discouraged by my experiences.

Best advice I can give: just keep going, and avoid orgasms as much as possible until you respond naturally to women. If your penis is really responding, don't force it! Keep you head down, and keep trucking.

 

[EDallmylife]

Thought I'd make a status update/progress report just in case anyone is actually following my "case".

It's been a bit over a month without any PMO or MO. I dont have ANY problems avoiding porn since I was never addicted to it. I do however feel incredible urges to masturbate sometimes, specially in when I have morning wood. The fact that I haven't ejaculated in over a month is crazy to me and I feel like if I would take a girl home and my penis would actually work I would come in one second.

Lately I have been using dating sites more frequently than before and also started to have more porn fantasies which I inintially (first 2 weeks) really tried to avoid. I feel like this might be an issue and might be working against my rewireing but I also cant seem to stop because by the time I realise what Im thinking of it's too late and it will just pop back in my mind in a little while anyways.

Flatline: The first 3 weeks were miserable. My dick was completely dead, tiny, unresponsive. But last week or so I have realised an increase in flacid size that I haven't seen in years if ever. So that's nice...