My life is falling apart, please help!!

[anonymous217]

I am a 17 year old junior in high school who started watching almost every day when i was in 8th grade. And i know 3 and a half years seems kind of short but my life is going down the drain. I dont know how to stop. Im like mega addicted. Im losing my hair, and i am unable to heal any of my injuries because of this problem. Not to mention i am lathargic all the time and have no will to do anything!!! I know people say to go do stuff like exersise and non-screen time but I play Varsity Soccer and Basketball and i dont know how to quit. I always find that urge to go back and watch. I have no idea what i am going to do for college, and my love life sucks!!! I mean i havent dated anyone since i was a freshman, and that was a horrible, desperate relationship! The girl i like now it seems like we are really close, but i am akward around her a lot because i watch so much and i think this is a big turn off for her. And not to mention im suicidal. If their's no hope for me in this world (will never get a decent job, or woman) then what's the point of living?? Watching has destroyed my life completely, and if someone has a solution out there, i will love you forever. Please dont refer me to something, just explain it to me!! Because ive searched for far to long, and i dont want my life to go up in flames anymore...

 

[Poker]

Watch this.....  its taken from another thread and well worth it. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXtEcQGLWW8

There is life beyond Porn.  Its difficult for me to tell a young person not to what I have done for decades.  I didn't come to the decision to stop one day as a grand gesture to make my life better.....  its because my junk stopped working.  And that sucks.  I'll be honest here.....  working junk has motivated me tremendously, and all the other benefits from quitting porn, are just a bonus. 

I had a bunch of stuff written....  some of my life examples...  but you don't need to hear that right now.  What you need to know is you're here.  That is great that you understand you need help.  This is fixable.  You will get through this.  Even if you slip up, you can still pick yourself up and carry on. 

Use the support....  ask all the questions you need.  Watch and read the info on YourBrainOnPorn.com .  I cannot tell you how much understanding how your reward system works will help you beat this.


Cheers,

p.

 

[Chaos Mind]

The girl i like now it seems like we are really close, but i am akward around her a lot because i watch so much and i think this is a big turn off for her

Continuing the porn consumption although knowing you have a problem...yes that's a big turn off for her.
Quitting the shit because you've realized you have a problem...fighting the addiction and becoming the strong young man you've used to be...is a big turn on for her!

if someone has a solution out there, i will love you forever.

The solution is in yourself. Find it and love yourself! Seriously, we can only give some advice and help you through the tough time. But it always comes back to you. We can't change your life. YOU can.

 

[Attos]

Putting yourself down is of little benefit.

If you can't stop, do less of it ... As a general rule, if your goal is too hard break it down into smaller pieces and tackle one of them at a time.

A tiny bit of effort every day will add up over time if you give it a chance ...

Try to put more distance between you and your addiction. When you feel the "urge", get out of the room, walk few steps, while thinking about why you are doing it and how it makes you feel. If you return at your PC afterwards, at least you have the benefit of the thinking time.

It will be easier to walk away if you catch the "bad thoughts" in the first milisecond as they appear, which can be done with enough practice.

If you can't stay 2 hours away from your computer, try 30 minutes or 10. Just shot it down, unplug it, and go for a walk outside, look at the sky.

If you don't have the will to go out to a gym, start with just few minutes of exercise couple of times of day.

There are hundreds of pieces of useful advice that you can research on this site and other support sites. Put 1-2 hours worth of effort into this kind of research. If you don't find something that you can use, at least it means couple ours away from your habit.

If sometimes, you end up watching porn anyway, while you are doing it, ask yourself questions, what you are feeling, what benefits and disadvantages you get from porn.

Also, while you are watching porn, open a video window (youtube or something) with a useful inspirational video, such as the benefits of physical exercise or a short exercise routine or some scientific explanation of the addiction mechanism, or some of the videos you see posted on this site.

Try to multitask little more: while you're playing a game, and are also opening a porn window, open couple more windows where you actively research what you can do to fight your addiction. And if it causes you to lose the game or skip a hot sex scene, don't worry, there's more to life than that

At least you will get some  parts of your brain working for you and not against you.

And keep in mind that knowledge is power, the more you understand about yourself, your thoughts and feelings, the easier will be for you to change.