Divorce

[Gracie]

The other day when I went out to eat with two women friends, they each mentioned friends that had marriages destroyed by porn.  The husbands would not give it up.  They told the husbands what it was doing to their marriage.  They worried about their children walking in and seeing them PMOing.  One asked what happens when our daughter is the same age as the young girls you are seeking out. 

These men gave away their children and marriages all for porn.  How sad.  And as hard as it may be to believe, I did not start the conversation.  This saddens me.

These men, according to the conversation, told their wives that they were not attractive enough, did not give them enough sex, and were different after the children were born.  So sad.  The women were totally crushed.  I see men here who do this same thing.  I know that I did not like sex with a porner.  It was just that sex.  I wanted caring loving passionate sex.  Not I only care about my penis sex. 

Men here please do not be like these men.  Put on your love glasses and love your women for all they are.  Look at what is right about your relationship.  There is not a better investment of time and feelings anywhere.

 

[sodonewithit]

Recently my wife said the short sentence I am using in my signature while I was trapped in bed screwing our/my sex life up.  Thankfully I never felt that my wife wasn't sexy but I sure did feel that we should be a porn movie which was both unrealistic and, frankly in hindsight,  unwanted.  When you spend all ones sexual energy in porn land real life isn't going to measure up but the worst sex is better then the best masturbation. 

It's comical that I could have been convinced that my sweet lady should act like those women on  the screen, while she can lull it off I didn't want that.  More comical was the notion that I could be the porn dude, HAHAHAHA!  I try my best to keep in shape but I'm no rippling muscle 20 year old so who on earth am I to have had these expectations, even more so if I'm gonnna be the 39 year old mid life doofus.

Would I like more sex?  Clearly.  More blow jobs? Hell ya! A little kinky stuff?  Please  Mrs. Sodonewithit 8)

Lets face reality here.  At some point these divorced guys might get the chance the bed a woman and it's not going to end well.  Man up, have sex with the wife and turn life around.  No comparing, no pmo and no being a twit.

I could go on, there is a lot of anger I have towards myself and this mentality but we all have to learn lessons ourselves.  Good luck guy, you don't have any idea how screwed your studdly ass is. 

 

[Iwasthatgirl]

My ex left. He expected to be adored. He thought the grass was greener ... The grass is, of course, green where you water it.

Addiction is such a threat because the impulses are so overwhelming. Still, adults need to face consequences. My ex bailed after 15 years without a blink. I felt devastated and humiliated. Never an amend, yet, I know one is felt

"They" say, history is the best predictor of the future. If one is prone to thought distortions and blowing up relationships needlessly, perhaps slowing down would be helpful.

But really, my message is this:  if you have caused such pain as mine- take the time and care to attempt to amend it.  You may not realize the impact you have, but, pretending it doesn't exist, is pretending. Fwiw.