Agere contra

[Philgood63]

Thanks Joe for your comment in my journal, that makes perfect sense to me. It's right : The voice of our limbic brain is always trying to convince us looking at P using this very progressive approach, with small steps that end up - if we lose our focus - to PMO. It's rarely a direct incentive to PMO, it's more vicious. Now that I'm aware of that I think I will be stronger against this addiction.

I appreciate also the "I'm someone who does not PMO" strategy, sound like something that works. Sometimes I try to use it. I'll probably use it more in the next weeks.

Good look for the next days, Joe

 

[mayane]

Congrats Joe on making it past the one week mark.  You probably got past more, but I know you are brutally honest with yourself and that makes the milestone that much more worthwhile. 
I followed the advice that you gave to nail down what it is that drives me to P and I believe that I am getting closer to the answer. 
For me, it is action.  If my day is not action packed, the brain looks for other alternates and P crops up.  Now there are other ways to keep an action packed day that are more productive and fulfilling and I am figuring out that.  Thanks for the advice.
Affirmations haven't worked for me - what I try to do is set it as a challenge: it is a personal challenge to win back control of my brain and the inherent competitiveness then kicks in. 
I also read on another member's journal that meditation and religion help.  I haven't tried either, but I am making my day more disciplined and this seems to be helping. 
Keep posting and Best.

 

[joe_ireland]

Guys thanks for your posts. I have had to make an important career decision last few weeks and ended up using p as a stress- relief. that's my excuse anyway. Well, back up on the mule and trying again.

 

[joe_ireland]

Back to zero again. If anything the last few weeks have shown me that I don't have the same amount of control that I thought. I thought I would beat it first time around; I didn't think the addiction was that deeply ingrained. If I really want to beat this I will have to take a much more radical approach and a much greater effort.

This time Im going all in. No excuses.

Im writing up some ideas about myself, where my desires stem from and how to master them; Ill post them up later today.

Good luck to everyone else making the journey!

 

[Philgood63]

Hi Joe, good to hear of you again, even if you are back to "zero"... well, you know it's not really "zero" of course. As you say, you have learned things during these last weeks. It's more than one year since I started fighting this addiction, and I can't even count the fails, but I don't care because I definitly feel the progression, and today I'm a better person than one year ago, I'm in better mood and I have more future. Today you have more determination than ever, so let's keep on doing it, good luck !

 

[afb7]

I look forward to reading your list.

And thanks for writing on my journal. It's good to have connections when I'm back at such a tough time in my recovery.

 

[joe_ireland]

Thanks for the support phil and Afb7. Although I guess its really not back to zero, it feels fairly depressing. What is surprising is that in the past I have gone a month - 2 months without looking at p. without any great strain or effort.  Yet when I make a real determined effort to quit I find Im under constant attack every day of the week and in constant desolation. It is almost as if the harder the try, the more difficult it becomes. As if something inside is determined that I should not give up p. and is fighting like hell to keep me addicted.
The hot summer weather doesn't help either!
Ive been writing down a lot of ideas and will put them up in next day or two.