I am new and strive for 91 days

[Nietz]

Hi folks!

Until this day I regularly masturbated and watched porn every third night or so. By this I weakened my willpower, so I often end up using the internet at work (which is allowed - no I do not watch porn there - but which steals my working time anyway). So please keep your fingers crossed for me. I need a restart and would like to find out what changes I encounter when I don't masturbate for the next three months.

Nietz

 

[Viper]

Welcome-
Probably need a little more info. Don't need a novel but are you experiencing something
bad as a direct result of porn and/or masturbation?

 

[Nietz]

Hi Viper,

thanks for your response.

Well, as I wrote, when I masturbate, usually at night, I tend to crush my willpower for the following day. I won't be able to focus at work, I would tend to waste my time browsing somewhere in the internet. All that results in a bad conscience in the following evening.

Alas, my prior experiments to abstain from PMO only lasted for 3 to 5 days. This time I seek assistance from this forum, from the day counter supplied here and from the lessons I learned in the past. Even in my short periods of abstention I noticed a strengthening of my willpower and an increase of energy.

I hope to benefit from the following guidelines:

1. Stay away from PMO and edging;
2. Run at least twice a week, do pushups every morning;
3. Take only cold showers;
4. Don't waste your time in front of any screen;
5. Find your purpose in life; for me that will be my work which has the potential to fulfil me.
6. ... to be found out and added.

So, this time, I've already managed day 1 ... Keep your fingers crossed ... 

Yours

Nietz 

 

[Blue Bird]

HI Nietz:

Welcome. it is nice you are setting your targets and formula to focus on thenm. It is the best way. We all know it is very difficult to stop the addiction. We experien it all the time.  My advice to you: talk to us, post your feelings and difficulties (it helps  a lot) and stay connected in this forum reading journals and interacting. People here are ready to help and share.
All the best for you.

Blue Bird

 

[Viper]

I don't know if willpower is crushed.
Do you mean it crushes your motivation?
Like the following day, you're not as motivated and you lack focus and feel lethargic?

 

[Nietz]

When I give in and surf the internet at work I lose my discipline for the rest of the day, I become lazy and lose my interest in work.

With PMO it's different. I have a fantasy harem that I used to daydream of. When any feeling of sadness, lonliness or just hornyness turned up, I would give in, fantasize on my imaginary girls, watch porn at night and masturbate. Once or twice in a week that could take two hours in the night.

So I feel that my main purpose will be to give me life meaning, grant myself self-respect by self-respectful behavior, stay focused ... and get enough sleep. There are other weaknesses of my behavior to tackle, but there are other posts to come.

Good night to everyone!

Nietz

 

[Viper]

Ok,
do you have any goals whatsoever?
Like, is there a promotion looming at work?
Not sure how old you are but do you have wife and/or children?

What other hobbies do you have?
I know during the day, I think about what I can do at the gym.
And yes, I too used to fantasize about certain porn performers
or just women I see anywhere and beat my meat later.

I ask about the other hobbies because lets say you hit the gym,
I know I would focus on how productive of a workout I can get
later. Some people think about projects around the house.
Are you a home owner?

So there has to be something that needs production from you
that you can occupy your mind with. Rebooting will definitely
help.

 

[Nietz]

I work in the law field, and there is a lot for me to achieve, not an imminent promotion but skill, knowledge and a good reputation among my colleagues. Furthermore I like to read philosophy, another task that could replace PMO.

This night is the first I felt horny again. I didn't give in, though, I just mused on the sensation without fantasyzing.

I'll keep you posted ...

 

[Nietz]

Now on day 5 I've been having some strong urges to masturbate. This is now a crucial time for me. Because in the past, after five days the one question regularly came into my mind: Is it worth to abstain from MB, an orgasm would feeel great now ... ??

This time, I try to recall, what I am up to (personal growth), I pray and try to connect with god, and I say to myself that this time I do not want to throw away what I have already achieved (at least 5 days ...).

Please, my Lord, let me stay strong!

 

[Viper]

Just so you know,
I'm over 100 days PMO free and I would be lying if I told you I had no urge to jerk off.
It's not as bad as the first couple of months. YOu can do it though.
You wouldn't bother with this forum if you weren't serious about changing.

This site is going on 3 months so if you see some of the journals of guys that have
been here since, you can read a similar journey that you're going through now.

 

[Nietz]

This day I've been having the worst attacks of horniness so far. I managed to do my work though. I notice that I feel the urge to have an orgasm when I am tired or distressed. So far I managed to survive but I have no clue yet how to tackle horniness effectively.

Does anybody have some hints ... ?

So long.

Tomorrow I will have been abstinent for a week. This is a record for me.

Nietz

 

[CrazyGopher]

Ah, yes, tackling horniness. Exercise is a sure bet for me. It doesn't make the horniness go away, but I do feel better afterwards.

If you need an easy one, pushups can be done pretty much anywhere.

Getting practice living with the higher level of sexual energy will also help. It takes time to learn how to be comfortable with it.

I'm sure you'll get some more good tips from others.

 

[Mojo]

Hi Nietz, I am having the same struggles that you are.  Seems like I can feel something building up for a few days before I relapse.  Finally, I talk myself into PMOing being a release of the pressure that has been building up, then I can start fresh.  It always sounds foolish when I think about it right after the fact.  Hopefully realizing the cycle will be step one, breaking it will be step 2.

 

[Viper]

Hey Nietz,
any progress?