I'm confused and I need help! Reboot vs Rewire

[reboot]

Hi All,

I have been off porn for quite a while (about 3 months), although i did have 2 nights in a row where i was drunk and PMO'd to some cam girl porn.

Background in bullet form:
-24 years old now
-PMO since 12
-got into weird porn (TS, cuckold) about 5 years ago
-couldnt get hard to regular porn or without porn

I have a question about rewiring vs rebooting.

When should i start rewiring? I still dont get any erections as I am flatlined. Whenever I do see my gf and we are making out etc i get hard, but maybe 60-70%. Do i need to reboot longer so that my erections are stronger? Or should I start rewiring now?

Also I am unsure what the rewiring processes really entails? Is there a no O policy? I wanna get this over with and I don't want to lose the sexual spark/attraction with my gf (even though she knows).

 

[faptastic]

dude im like you nearly six weeks in and no sexual interest in anything so just hang in their ok theirs a light at the end of the tunnel

 

[Mart71]

You already started rewiring.....

Rewiring doesn't just mean having sex. It starts with and needs being with a girl/a real partner and just spend time together. You notice yourself, how you get aroused by your gf already.

So your question is rather, when you start having sex. The answer is - when you feel you are ready to try.

Some people want to wait, until they are "healed". That is probably too long or may never happen as they expect it to be like.

It is often a good idea, to start sex slowly. That means, just start doing it and see where you are. Some guys sort of snap right back in and everything works sufficiently fine. Others get ED episodes before entering or during sex. That is not uncommon, so don't freak out, if it happens. The magic of sex during rewiring is rinse and repeat. Meaning: keep trying.

Stay away from porn. If possible, stay away from MO as well. And, as hard as it is, limiting your orgasms with your girl might be a good idea. Many guys experience orgasms from sex as a setback for their libido. It happens to me as well and I am in my seventh month of rewiring with sex. You need to find out, what works for you and what doesn't.

Super gentle sex styles like Karezza are often recommended, probably also to teach to better connect to your partner. Personally, the sex without orgasm part is what works for me and what I need, so even rough sex works, as long as I don't cum every time. In my case, that can mean having sex several times a day every day of the week, but only allowing orgasm two or three times a week. Just recently two orgasms within 12 hours was too much (I hoped it would be okay, but it wasn't) and my libido flatlined for many days.

I have learned to do that during my reboot and it makes my gf happier - she suffered quite a bit from my problems in bed, so I do what I can to please her and make it up to her.

 

[reboot]

You already started rewiring.....

Rewiring doesn't just mean having sex. It starts with and needs being with a girl/a real partner and just spend time together. You notice yourself, how you get aroused by your gf already.

So your question is rather, when you start having sex. The answer is - when you feel you are ready to try.

Some people want to wait, until they are "healed". That is probably too long or may never happen as they expect it to be like.

It is often a good idea, to start sex slowly. That means, just start doing it and see where you are. Some guys sort of snap right back in and everything works sufficiently fine. Others get ED episodes before entering or during sex. That is not uncommon, so don't freak out, if it happens. The magic of sex during rewiring is rinse and repeat. Meaning: keep trying.

Stay away from porn. If possible, stay away from MO as well. And, as hard as it is, limiting your orgasms with your girl might be a good idea. Many guys experience orgasms from sex as a setback for their libido. It happens to me as well and I am in my seventh month of rewiring with sex. You need to find out, what works for you and what doesn't.

Super gentle sex styles like Karezza are often recommended, probably also to teach to better connect to your partner. Personally, the sex without orgasm part is what works for me and what I need, so even rough sex works, as long as I don't cum every time. In my case, that can mean having sex several times a day every day of the week, but only allowing orgasm two or three times a week. Just recently two orgasms within 12 hours was too much (I hoped it would be okay, but it wasn't) and my libido flatlined for many days.

I have learned to do that during my reboot and it makes my gf happier - she suffered quite a bit from my problems in bed, so I do what I can to please her and make it up to her.

Thanks for the insight man. Much appreciated, but I just came out of a really worrisome situation...

So I'm totally freaking out right now. I have crazy anxiety because of something that happened. It has been a month since I've been intamate with my gf and we tried having sex. I wasn't getting hard at all!!! I feel like I am back at square one! Or even worse! Ive been able to get a little hard in the past (about 50%). But this time there was nothing. Absolutely nothing (about 10%). I also was leaking some precum too even though I was relatively flaccid. I have been in a flatline for about 3-4 weeks. I'm freaking out right now and I don't know what to do.... I fucking hate this