Recent content by zubeneschamali

Well, my urge was weakening, too, but it was still strong enough for a relapse. I know what triggered it, I know how to deal with it next time. The path to success is never linear. I said before, I don't count days, I focus on the here and the now. Understanding why I relapse is part of the process.

It's great not feeling guilty all the time. Very positive about how this is going and the future.

My mantra is, "No. I made a decision not to be that person any more. I'm not going back on that."

Thanks, will read about Tantric practices.

Still doing well. Big factor for me is suppressing mental imagery. Porn imprints persistent images in your brain that enable you to relive and experience porn completely in your mind. Such imagery can pop up into your consciousness at nearly any time. It's important for me to suppress it the...

I'm recognizing that one of my strongest triggers is procrastination. I have used PMO to avoid doing things I needed to do for ages. I can also see where I've used other avoidance techniques (e.g. online games) in place of PMO when I've been resisting the urge, to also enable procrastination...

Just checking back in. All going well, controlling my triggers, getting stuff done. Not much progress on dealing with my long-term sexuality issues, but I'm getting back to that. Not really counting the days, because I'm not going back to who I was, and looking forward is my focus. Thanks for...

Impressive effort you're making, congratulations. My history is similar to yours. I'm trying something different this time, I'm going away from the "counting the days" thing I've done in the past, which hasn't worked for me. I'm viewing my change as a moment-by-moment decision process where I'm...

Read your struggle, feel your pain. I've got a suggestion (one I'm trying to follow) that may help. In the past when I've tried to end my addiction, I focused on the days. "OK, there's day one, if I can make it to day 7, that's a new record", or "If I go a month, then I'll buy X as a reward", et...

Agree, it isn't the porn/mb, it's more deep-rooted sexuality problems in my case. As for replacing porn/mb, I agree, and it's not like I'm lacking for things I need and want to do. Fear of failure at those things leads me to procrastination, and procrastination leads me to porn/mb. The wasted...

Yeah, it's been a lot of stuff over the years. I never was much of one to pay for anything. Magazines, then tape rentals. Pretty much straight from there into internet porn, which is the most insidious. I've known I'm an addict for years, have tried forums before to no success. Much higher...

Reading your postings and acknowledging your efforts. I'm starting the same (again) today, and I'm positive both you and I will be successful. Stay strong and stay dedicated, and learn from others here, that's my plan.

Some other things to know about me and pornography and my sexual history. I have never confided in anyone about my problems, and that includes my wife. I have never been caught masturbating or watching porn, despite doing it daily for about 50 years. I had many girlfriends and sexual partners...

Some particulars. I'm in my mid-60's, I had a 30+ year successful professional career and retired my early 50's. I'm athletic, married over 30 years and have two children. I've had some significant health issues but am in pretty good condition right now. I have a wide variety of interests and...

I have a 50+ year history of issues with sexual insecurities, sexual obsessions, pornography, and other related issues. I know I'm not alone in having these problems and have spent decades trying to deal with them on my own. I'm going to keep a personal journal here to help me put my issues to...