Hello Gentlemen. Now we begin.

[Jason]

Hello William,

Once again thank you for your kind words and I wanted to share an awesome victory!

I just wanted to say hello and I thought I would give you a quick update on things.  While my wife and son were in Florida for a few days I did not PMOE!  It was challenging let me tell you but this time in the grace of God I refused to look at porn of any kind. Notgivup gave me a pre pep talk on this forum with his words that were basically "Remember Jason your commitment" and that fired me up. 

The hardest part of the crucible was dealing with being alone all of the time.  However, I did four basic things (1). Refused to feel sorry for myself.  (2).  Gratitude-I just kept reminding myself of all the things I am thankful for all of the time. (3).  I kept myself busy for example things I did were homework and lots of it,cleaned the house, I got outside where the sun was and did yard work. (4). I read my Bible almost everyday at least ten chapters. (5). I watched good clean movies (6).  I also and am learning to have a sense of humor about things. 

Those were the things I did while my family was away.  I will say on the last day of this crucible (being apart from my family) I woke up with a morning wood that I could have went and played golf with!  I am deeply grateful for everybody on this forum and if I can do it anybody can. 

Let me also add what else motivated me and it ties in with recovery is "Those who carried burdens were loaded in a such a way that each labored on the work with one hand and held his weapon with the other" Nehemiah 4:17

In other words men of God always work hard and never ever underestimate the enemy! 

 

[mtaha2015]

Jason , those things will help you a lot.
this is the way we can reboot.
one day at a time.

 

[jkkk]

Once again my friend thank you for being like general Patton motivating us the troops to charge the gates of hell!!!!

Hah, that's a great way of putting it

As I said already earlier above, this thread was a game-changer for me as well. All that happened since September 2014 I owe in no small part to the way William put things in this thread. I think this played well to my "I had enough" thought and has helped me since immensely.

 

[mtaha2015]

jkkk , what inspired you here in this journal ?

 

[TheManWithaPlan]

What you were saying about wanting the withdrawal and wanting the pain. I have always wanted to do military and I always got this feeling of excitement when reading about training and how hard some of it is. I was excited because I knew if I could take the pain I would be able to do something that I wanted. I got that same excitement just now reading your post. I feel more motivated now to see this reboot to the end. Thank you for that.

 

[mtaha2015]

yup
motivational.

 

[Jack Strap]

Watching the videos, installing K-9 and logging on at least once a day, thank god for this site. Looking forward to getting through the process, I've been watching porn so long I feel like I will have to be on guard the rest of my life, I have already gone a year then relapsed, this time I'm done.

Thank you for your words of wisdom.

 

[savemee]

If i stop MO and O for 1 year , my prostate will hurt? I will get prostatitis?Inflamation in prostate?
I saw an article that say only some people will get problems with prostate if they abstain . not all people.Thanks

(the best answer) https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090315175339AA2yf5p

 

[William]

Hi savemee, to answer your question, there are absolutely no harmful side effects of not MOing or Oing. You can go for life and it has no adverse consequences for you at all, including prostrate problems.  There are only benefits of not fapping, no negatives, psychologically or physically. 

 

[DragonSlayer]

If i stop MO and O for 1 year , my prostate will hurt? I will get prostatitis?Inflamation in prostate?
I saw an article that say only some people will get problems with prostate if they abstain . not all people.Thanks

(the best answer) https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090315175339AA2yf5p

Lol. This isn't an article, it is a random comment on the internet.

Don't worry about it. My guess (you should ask a urologist for an expert opinion) is that this would only affect a small percentage of the population that already has something .... let's say unusual about their prostate.

I know of one person at least (triple D) that has such a large prostate that he needs to drain it at least twice a day. The prostate is responsible for creating about 30-40% of the semen, so people with larger prostates will create more and may swell unless it gets used up somehow.

I know the body naturally absorbs sperm that stays in the body for a while, but I don't know about semen. Even if it does not, there are other ways to let it out of the body without M or O.

 

[savemee]

Its so confusing now.I mean i just need 1 year for my brain recorvery.This PMO destroyed 10 years from my life.I am a pro bodybuilder and when i was on college all the girls wanted to be with me..But becouse PMO i had severe social anxiety,ocd,adhd,no motivation for anything,depression,suicidal, eye floaters,mechanical tears in eye becouse of anxiety . I HATE THIS!!
Becouse of low dopamine i had chronic fatigue, and weight gain i guess,
Now i dont care about my prostate too much .I care about my brain mainly.But i think i have a normal prostate.I had a 90 day reboot period 1 year ago and no sperm or blood in urine, no pain in testicles or prostate.Everything was fine .I relapsed becouse of stress and exams etc...now i have a good job ,a bodybuilding career and i want to escape from this hell.I mean now i have the same symptoms but less intense.
Before i had a lot of eye floaters now i have 1 and some little ones very little...and low-mid social anxiety etc.I will never masturbate NEVER.Only real sex.  Masturbation is a scam for brain.The penis was made for vagina not for the hand.

 

[DanteKO]

Great post. I always thought that I had to embrace the pain from withdrawal in order to truly overcome this addiction to pornography, and this post helped to shed light on how we all tend to rationalize while we are quitting. It is just the brain creating fiction and fake necessities to get another fix of dopamine.

 

[afb7]

It's good to remember that the withdrawal will be bad and needs to be embraced. My last reset was after about 2.5 weeks, and the withdrawal was like that voice in my ear saying, "This isn't working. You're tired and not getting much done. This is worse than PMO'ing would be, so just do it."  I had so much optimism and strength at first, and it's amazing how easy it is for that kind of resolve to get washed from your brain.

Day two of my current reboot and I'm going to try to go much deeper into the withdrawal period than ever before. Actually embrace it this time as that necessary reboot my brain needs.

Thanks for the post and the message.

 

[kable]

So many useful tips, experiences, info. Just what I need to educate myself and overcome my addiction.
Thank you all guys, it's good to know I'm not alone. Now day 9, I want to avoid that sh** for the rest of my life.

 

[Poker]

That's a great attitude to have.... the rest of your life.

I personally have seen 2 types of individuals on here.  Ones that want to rid themselves of this for good....  and ones who want to fix the problem, and then go back and "control" there use of it.  All really good guys, don't get me wrong....  its just if you think you can control it, you setting yourself up for failure. 

Good luck my friend.

Cheers,

p.

 

[DeBo]

Will, did u suffer from Ed when u first started..and if u did is it corrected and back to u performing whenever u get aroused and want sex?

Wut are eye floaters @saveme?

 

[William]

Hi DeBo.  I never had ED, not serious ED, but though I did not know it at the time, porn addiction had lessened the strength of my erections.  Now, hard as a rock, harder than when I was actively addicted, and always works for sex.  My main symptom was DE, which translates to "I could only reach O with porn," not during sex, and that is corrected.

Eye floaters.  Nothing scientific on that, but some guys will tell you they are the result of excessive masturbation.  I do believe they happen but I think they are the result of a dopamine high or dopamine flood.  That is when we choose to indulge porn or hypersexual thoughts, flooding our brain with dopamine.  I think for some of us, it does cause us to feel our eyesight is a bit affected by seeing lights that are not really there, aka eye floaters. 

 

[Branch]

Thanks, William.  I'm taking everything you say seriously. You're right about the hard 90--it's the only way out, there's no way around it.

I read, copied and saved Action? or not!!! by aron.

I've been a porn addict for 3 years and during that time in times of lucidity, I've done my homework. I've done a ton of reading and viewing.  I have the knowledge and I know what I need to do. I learned from periods of abstinence what works.  I'm prepared, but what's been lacking in all my previous attempts has been grit.  Grit, grit and more grit.

I'm 60, but there's a lot more I want to be and want to accomplish.  Thanks again for setting an example and for steering me in the right direction. 

 

[William]

Welcome Branch.  Aron was a teacher.  He helped people.  Grit, grit, and more grit.  There is no easy way out.  But there is a way out.  See you on the other side.  See you on this side of free. 

Billy the Kid.

Thanks, William.  I'm taking everything you say seriously. You're right about the hard 90--it's the only way out, there's no way around it.

I read, copied and saved Action? or not!!! by aron.

I've been a porn addict for 3 years and during that time in times of lucidity, I've done my homework. I've done a ton of reading and viewing.  I have the knowledge and I know what I need to do. I learned from periods of abstinence what works.  I'm prepared, but what's been lacking in all my previous attempts has been grit.  Grit, grit and more grit.

I'm 60, but there's a lot more I want to be and want to accomplish.  Thanks again for setting an example and for steering me in the right direction.

 

[Branch]

Hey, Billy.  So I take it Anon has passed away because you speak of him in the past tense.  I was a teacher, too.  I loved being a teacher.  It's weird--I never even knew of him till I read his preparation post the other day, but I'm affected by knowing he's gone.  Maybe because I can see a teacher hard at work in his post.  Lately I've been studying the Stages of Change, which he describes in detail. His post is so useful. I feel like I owe him something.

Just wanted to share how I feel.  Thanks for the encouragement.  See you on the other side.