Hello, everybody.
This is my story. Sorry about my clumsy English, it's not my native language.
I am 40 years old, was married 2 times, lived an active sexual life and never had sexual problems until this year (except for one case of PA several years ago). When I was young, MO was often thing to do, sometimes even during marriage - when I was away from home. I saw P first time only when I was 20, and it was vanilla stuff on video. Encountered high-speed internet-porn when I was around 30, but didn't watch it regularly. For the last 2 years it become more often, and eventually it caused DE, and then ED. I never had an addiction to it - it was just a way to relax, I watched some short videos in Inernet, jerked off, and then returned to casual every day things. It's interesting that I always understood deep in my soul, that PMO is harmful - because I felt that it's getting harder to get O when I did MO without P. When I would stop PMO (switching back to sex with girls) the system recovered quickly and I would forget about it. The last couple of years were not very happy, so I would PMO very often, every day, sometimes 3-4 times a day. I felt first symptoms of DE in this February (hard to get an O.), it frustrated me. In June I started to constrain myself: prohibited to watch videos (only pictures of naked girls), and in the end of July I even disallow myself to watch any naked bodies, just MO every three days. I started to feel a little better, O would come more easy.
The catasrophe occured in the end of August. On a dating site I met a beautiful girl (or I should say a golden-haired blue-eyed angel), brought her to my home and tried sex. Starting relationship before cured was a mistake. When I put a condom, erection disappeared. She made me 4 bj that night, but it was VERY hard to get O. We met the next night again, and I was unable to perform entirely. We broke up though before the sexual part of the drama we had been happy together. I was in despair and made a new mistake: I returned to P trying to restore my libido. It worked badly, only when I watched some hard BDSM stuff. Then I finally went to urologist, and he found a light form of prostatitis and cured it. During the treatment I practiced PMO, because thought it could help, I calmed down and erections were back, though rather weak and it was really hard to get an O. The prostatitis was cured but the problem was still there. I felt terrible.
Only then I understood at last that the root of the problem was in P. The last time I had PMO at 13:00 22 September. It was no pleasure at all. I decided to quit watching P or any erotic pictures at all. I deleted all P from my computer and felt very good. Here is my diary, I have been writing it in an Excel file.
This is my story. Sorry about my clumsy English, it's not my native language.
I am 40 years old, was married 2 times, lived an active sexual life and never had sexual problems until this year (except for one case of PA several years ago). When I was young, MO was often thing to do, sometimes even during marriage - when I was away from home. I saw P first time only when I was 20, and it was vanilla stuff on video. Encountered high-speed internet-porn when I was around 30, but didn't watch it regularly. For the last 2 years it become more often, and eventually it caused DE, and then ED. I never had an addiction to it - it was just a way to relax, I watched some short videos in Inernet, jerked off, and then returned to casual every day things. It's interesting that I always understood deep in my soul, that PMO is harmful - because I felt that it's getting harder to get O when I did MO without P. When I would stop PMO (switching back to sex with girls) the system recovered quickly and I would forget about it. The last couple of years were not very happy, so I would PMO very often, every day, sometimes 3-4 times a day. I felt first symptoms of DE in this February (hard to get an O.), it frustrated me. In June I started to constrain myself: prohibited to watch videos (only pictures of naked girls), and in the end of July I even disallow myself to watch any naked bodies, just MO every three days. I started to feel a little better, O would come more easy.
The catasrophe occured in the end of August. On a dating site I met a beautiful girl (or I should say a golden-haired blue-eyed angel), brought her to my home and tried sex. Starting relationship before cured was a mistake. When I put a condom, erection disappeared. She made me 4 bj that night, but it was VERY hard to get O. We met the next night again, and I was unable to perform entirely. We broke up though before the sexual part of the drama we had been happy together. I was in despair and made a new mistake: I returned to P trying to restore my libido. It worked badly, only when I watched some hard BDSM stuff. Then I finally went to urologist, and he found a light form of prostatitis and cured it. During the treatment I practiced PMO, because thought it could help, I calmed down and erections were back, though rather weak and it was really hard to get an O. The prostatitis was cured but the problem was still there. I felt terrible.
Only then I understood at last that the root of the problem was in P. The last time I had PMO at 13:00 22 September. It was no pleasure at all. I decided to quit watching P or any erotic pictures at all. I deleted all P from my computer and felt very good. Here is my diary, I have been writing it in an Excel file.