Looking for some advice

[Whynot]

Skeeter are you still having O with semi erections? 

I woke up this morning with my wife beside me and I gave her a body rub but nothing happened, she got out of bed and ended up going downstairs, so I decided to MO. Does anyone think that was wrong and considered a relapse?

 

[Skeeter53]

Yes I do. When I was using porn I often couldn?t get an erection or orgasm with someone else. Now I am extremely sensitive and orgasm before I am completely erect. It?s a new problem to work on but much better than what I was experiencing before.

 

[Whynot]

How are you working on that problem?  The other morning I MO and I was fully erected but the time my wife MO me it was a semi. How do we fix this semi-erection problem?

 

[Alex48]

Something similar is happening to me. I have high sensitivity so sometimes just touching me a little I can have O without reaching a full erection. I guess in my situation that's because I M once a week. I mean, it's normal for me, that O can get there before a good erection.

 

[Whynot]

When you M do you get full erection?  I would like to get a full erection with my wife and then O, am I doing something wrong?

 

[Alex48]

Hi papa. When I do M, the following happens to me, at least today: If I am touched and I am quite excited, I have to restrain myself from reaching O before having a good erection. I can manage it until I get a good erection and then O.
I read that a good way is to try MO or M without erotic thoughts, until you get a good erection. I found it strange, since I always used my imagination, but they say it's a good way to test recovery.
Keep in mind that in my case, I'm single, that's why I'm approaching in that way. If you were with someone, you are likely to opt for other ways.

 

[Whynot]

Interesting. So are you saying to M until you get good erection and then stop?  Isn?t that like edging ?

 

[Alex48]

Oh! Now I understand the term "edging". My English is not the best. I read before and i coudn't understand. Now it's clear.
I think is not edging because i don t do often, just when i decided to do MO. Take time to get a good erection and then O. I stay with what I told you in previous messages about advice about MO and do it without erotic thoughts.
I suppose that each case is very personal and different from another and I do not dare to say that it is better or worse. And i think that there is an information vacuum on how to continue after doing the hardmode. What is your opinion about these? What is moderator said about edging? I did not read about this practice and I think it's important. If you have information could be useful for me!!!!

 

[Skeeter53]

I can?t say that there is anything I?m doing to work on it. I just think it proves that I need more time. I?ve read about rebooting and rewiring. I think I?ve been successful getting off P and needing it to O. I think now I need to rewire with another person. Since I?m single my only encounters are with hookups and devoid of any feelings or intimacy. So I?m not getting fully erect because I?m not fully engaged with the other person, but I?m able to orgasm because I?m not reliant on porn. Kind of interesting.

 

[Alex48]

Hi Skeeter53! Do you think the only way to rewiring is with other person? I guess that's the way it is. It worries me meanwhile to take it. Papa talked about edging, and he left me thinking. I do not know if it is better or worse to do or not MO. I have full erection by M, but i don t know if end with O. If not, i suppose it s endging!

 

[Skeeter53]

Not necessarily. I just think that for a long time I did one of two things: PMO or a hookup. What was missing was that connection. I?m not sure there is a right answer, but I know that PMO is not it.

 

[Whynot]

I think edging is no good. If you are gonna M do it without the thoughts of P. I think if you M and then don?t O you are feeding the dopamine drug. But I?m not sure, I could be wrong.

 

[Alex48]

Yes papa, t think you re wright. Now it s getting difficult for me, because i m on 6 months without PMO, and i m single, you know. I'm starting to think that maybe it's better to try to find someone to have good sex, even if it does not reach something else like a relation. For me it is difficult, because I was always looking for stable relationships, even though I may be a very sexual person. In this situation I guess it's better to stay around and flirting with edging or M or MO hehe. And to rewiring is escencial to be with other person. I'm at a crossroads!!!

 

[Whynot]

Day 173.
It?s been a couple of weeks since I had an O with my wife and I am starting to get some urges to M.  It?s 830 in the morning and I have about 20 minutes to kill, thoughts running through my mind of what to do, not good thoughts, This is why am here now.  I thought I would check in and let you guys know how I?m feeling and hopefully I will just go to the shower and get on with my day

 

[Alex48]

Hello Papa. I hope you are well and that you have been able to avoid M with thoughts. Just for being and commenting something, in my case I am thinking that maybe I have to incorporate MO once a week because otherwise it is very difficult for me. It's been 6 months since I started the reboot, with the first 3 in hardmode. And being single is complicated.
I have many doubts about what is the best at this stage and I suppose that the same thing happens to you.
So it seems you have many days, and if that contributes to the progress of the relationship with your wife continues like this.
Hugs

 

[misc person 86]

not good thoughts

Papa, hang in there. You've come so far. It gets easier, better, sometimes frustrating but the end goal is closer to you now. If you get an urge, just do some pushups or something, get the heart racing. Think of what you have achieved and will achieve.

 

[JedClampett]

Papa:

At least you are not hiding from the problem.  I understand that is important to the process.

 

[JedClampett]

"What the mind can conceive and believe the mind can achieve."
Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich (One of the most important books ever written.  It was published in 1937.)

"Therefore I tell you whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."
Mark 11:24 New International Version (NIV) of the bible.  I am not sure if one can say who said it on Reboot Nation
but I'm betting most of you know.  If not find a bible and locate it.  You can also use Google and find that exact verse.

I have interviewed many former Olympic God medalists and other Olympians.  Many of them have told me
that what you achieve in life is dictated by your mind.  What you do is train the front brain with words.  The front brain
trains the back brain through repetition. So when you have to take action with the back brain you can perform.
One might have some key words such as, "lift your knees, or "run tall."  But mostly the work is done in practice.

Everyone has the will to win, what we must have is the will to prepare. 

 

[JedClampett]

"What the mind can conceive and believe the mind can achieve."
Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich (One of the most important books ever written.  It was published in 1937.)

"Therefore I tell you whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."
Mark 11:24 New International Version (NIV) of the bible.  I am not sure if one can say who said it on Reboot Nation
but I'm betting most of you know.  If not find a bible and locate it.  You can also use Google and find that exact verse.

I have interviewed many former Olympic Gold medalists and other Olympians.  Many of them have told me
that what you achieve in life is dictated by your mind.  What you do is train the front brain with words.  The front brain
trains the back brain through repetition. So when you have to take action with the back brain you can perform.
One might have some key words such as, "lift your knees, or "run tall."  But mostly the work is done in practice.

Everyone has the will to win, what we must have is the will to prepare. 

 

[ClaudeBolling]

WOW 138 days. You must pat yourself on the back. Seriously. That is a major achievement in my eyes. I'm 53 or something, and my longest streak is 7 days. I started on similar sites from 2016 and it's a slow process.