REBOOT: 7 MONTHS Without Porn - 21 Year Old Addicted Since Age 11
- Thread starter DIMA-NBA
- Start date
DIMA-NBA
Member
2019-03
I met up with Ray - my brother in this fight a few times more. Every time we talked it was beneficial, we talked about the root causes of addiction. It was pain.
I was eating more junk food than usual. At least I helped my mate make some gains in the gym. We started going going to the gym 4 times a week and we were having great training sessions. I usually train by myself so it was good to have gym partner.
In my mind porn addiction thrives in secrecy. It's easy to say to yourself ''It doesn't matter if I watch porn, nobody is going to know''. I put an end to that secret by telling Ray. I decided to take it a step further and tell someone else I trusted. I told a very close friend of mine about my addiction. We knew each other back from university. I'm glad I did, it's not an easy talk to have, admitting your shortcomings. He was very understanding and listened to me - that's all I needed from him.
I met up with Ray - my brother in this fight a few times more. Every time we talked it was beneficial, we talked about the root causes of addiction. It was pain.
I was eating more junk food than usual. At least I helped my mate make some gains in the gym. We started going going to the gym 4 times a week and we were having great training sessions. I usually train by myself so it was good to have gym partner.
In my mind porn addiction thrives in secrecy. It's easy to say to yourself ''It doesn't matter if I watch porn, nobody is going to know''. I put an end to that secret by telling Ray. I decided to take it a step further and tell someone else I trusted. I told a very close friend of mine about my addiction. We knew each other back from university. I'm glad I did, it's not an easy talk to have, admitting your shortcomings. He was very understanding and listened to me - that's all I needed from him.
DIMA-NBA
Member
2019-04
Three months without porn.
Since I was qualified as gym instructor I was hoping to get a job in a gym. Unfortunately there weren't many positions available and I had allowed that to discourage me. In April, I decided it was time for a change. I accepted that I couldn't do what I wanted to do for a living so I swallowed my pride and signed up at an agency so they can find me any job.
I started working in a automotive warehouse. I was glad I had that job. I got listening to Jordan Peterson on my way to work. I fully resonate with what he is saying and I think he is sending a great message to young people. Jordan Peterson is a clinical psychologist and a professor at university who has a lot of vids of his lectures on YouTube. He helped me when I was at my darkest moments.
Three months without porn.
Since I was qualified as gym instructor I was hoping to get a job in a gym. Unfortunately there weren't many positions available and I had allowed that to discourage me. In April, I decided it was time for a change. I accepted that I couldn't do what I wanted to do for a living so I swallowed my pride and signed up at an agency so they can find me any job.
I started working in a automotive warehouse. I was glad I had that job. I got listening to Jordan Peterson on my way to work. I fully resonate with what he is saying and I think he is sending a great message to young people. Jordan Peterson is a clinical psychologist and a professor at university who has a lot of vids of his lectures on YouTube. He helped me when I was at my darkest moments.
DIMA-NBA
Member
2019-05
Four months without porn.
Mostly working and training. My workouts with my gym buddy got better and better. The intensity was there, we were pushing each other. He got stronger. We got close. He told me about a mental illness he dealed with and I decided to continue to trend of telling my close friends about my addiction. I told him, he listened to me and he even said he had tried to limit his porn use at times.
My gym buddy graduated from University and left the country. He was very pleased with how I trained him. We still keep in touch.
Four months without porn.
Mostly working and training. My workouts with my gym buddy got better and better. The intensity was there, we were pushing each other. He got stronger. We got close. He told me about a mental illness he dealed with and I decided to continue to trend of telling my close friends about my addiction. I told him, he listened to me and he even said he had tried to limit his porn use at times.
My gym buddy graduated from University and left the country. He was very pleased with how I trained him. We still keep in touch.
DIMA-NBA
Member
2019-06
5 Months without porn. I set some fitness goals and I started gradually losing weight. I went to play basketball a lot. Basketball was great for me because I could meet people on the court and be active at the same time. But above all it was the human contact.
I realised that my hobbies have been a big help in keeping me on the right path. I bought some boxing gloves a few months back and after each workout I would go on the punching bag and let out any anger I had in me. I recorded videos and kept them for myself so I can see what I can improve on boxing-wise.
5 Months without porn. I set some fitness goals and I started gradually losing weight. I went to play basketball a lot. Basketball was great for me because I could meet people on the court and be active at the same time. But above all it was the human contact.
I realised that my hobbies have been a big help in keeping me on the right path. I bought some boxing gloves a few months back and after each workout I would go on the punching bag and let out any anger I had in me. I recorded videos and kept them for myself so I can see what I can improve on boxing-wise.
DIMA-NBA
Member
2019-07
6 Months without porn.
I made some friends at work and I felt good working there regardless of the low pay. I had a laugh with a few guys every day.
Mid July I learned that the company had to downsize and they had to let go all the agency workers including me.
That same week I had bought a basketball and went to play more often now that I didn't depend on anyone to have a ball or to go at a specific time.
I took a kick to the ego starting a temporary job as cleaner which ironically was better paid than the more prestige looking automotive industry job. Anyways I worked there for about 2 weeks until I went on my holiday which was planned months in advance.
I went back to my home country for 3 weeks. It felt great to see my family again, some of my hometown and high school friends. I exercised with my mom and helped her stay active, helped her with small things I could do for her.
I had a hard time sleeping as I had worked nightshift the weeks before. On my 2nd day back I told my dad about my addiction to pornography. Shortly after, I told my mom as well. I told them I've stayed away from porn for 6 months now.They responded well, my dad agreed with a few of the points I made against pornography. It was a tough talk to have but it needed to be done. Telling some of my friends about my addiction made it easier to share with my family.
A few days passed since I told my parents about my addiction. I was low on sleep and I felt strong unrest when going to bed. I could barely sleep 2-3 hours per night. It was horrible. I also catched myself being angrier than usual. I felt very sad and grim.
One day, underslept and possibly overtrained, I was feeling like shit. I went into an empty room, locked the door, I needed some time to myself. I played some music on my headphones. I felt sadness, I cried, I allowed myself - ''better to get that emotion out'' - I thought.
I cried for a significant amount of time, but I think I knew what it was for. It was because I felt alone in my fight. I told my parents but they don't know a whole lot about addiction. I felt alone in my struggle: ''I'm alone'' I repeated to myself as I cried.
It's good to het those emotions out , but rationally thinking about it, my parents aren't obliged to help me. They are not therapists or psychologists and they don't have to help me. I am 21 years old. I'm responsible for my own health, physical and mental.
It took a lot to tell them what I'm dealing with. Did I do the right thing by telling them? I suppose on a subconscious level my brain was doubting it. I'm sure I made the right decision to share it. I need to be strong.
6 Months without porn.
I made some friends at work and I felt good working there regardless of the low pay. I had a laugh with a few guys every day.
Mid July I learned that the company had to downsize and they had to let go all the agency workers including me.
That same week I had bought a basketball and went to play more often now that I didn't depend on anyone to have a ball or to go at a specific time.
I took a kick to the ego starting a temporary job as cleaner which ironically was better paid than the more prestige looking automotive industry job. Anyways I worked there for about 2 weeks until I went on my holiday which was planned months in advance.
I went back to my home country for 3 weeks. It felt great to see my family again, some of my hometown and high school friends. I exercised with my mom and helped her stay active, helped her with small things I could do for her.
I had a hard time sleeping as I had worked nightshift the weeks before. On my 2nd day back I told my dad about my addiction to pornography. Shortly after, I told my mom as well. I told them I've stayed away from porn for 6 months now.They responded well, my dad agreed with a few of the points I made against pornography. It was a tough talk to have but it needed to be done. Telling some of my friends about my addiction made it easier to share with my family.
A few days passed since I told my parents about my addiction. I was low on sleep and I felt strong unrest when going to bed. I could barely sleep 2-3 hours per night. It was horrible. I also catched myself being angrier than usual. I felt very sad and grim.
One day, underslept and possibly overtrained, I was feeling like shit. I went into an empty room, locked the door, I needed some time to myself. I played some music on my headphones. I felt sadness, I cried, I allowed myself - ''better to get that emotion out'' - I thought.
I cried for a significant amount of time, but I think I knew what it was for. It was because I felt alone in my fight. I told my parents but they don't know a whole lot about addiction. I felt alone in my struggle: ''I'm alone'' I repeated to myself as I cried.
It's good to het those emotions out , but rationally thinking about it, my parents aren't obliged to help me. They are not therapists or psychologists and they don't have to help me. I am 21 years old. I'm responsible for my own health, physical and mental.
It took a lot to tell them what I'm dealing with. Did I do the right thing by telling them? I suppose on a subconscious level my brain was doubting it. I'm sure I made the right decision to share it. I need to be strong.
DIMA-NBA
Member
2019-08
7 Months without porn.
During my holiday I meditated a lot and at one point I had a realisation. I'm a good person. I helped out my friends and family with getting their fitness on track, they see results and that makes me feel great. That put a smile on my face.
I got back to the UK and as I was in between jobs, I played basketball A LOT. I met a few people and one of those guys became close to me in a very short time. We competed hard against each other and I loved that.
I set a goal: to be able to dunk. I was able to achieve that. That felt great.
I got a job in a mail company doing 5 12-hour nightshifts. For like the past year I've been wanting to get a job with 60 or more hours per week just to see how I would take it.
7 Months without porn.
During my holiday I meditated a lot and at one point I had a realisation. I'm a good person. I helped out my friends and family with getting their fitness on track, they see results and that makes me feel great. That put a smile on my face.
I got back to the UK and as I was in between jobs, I played basketball A LOT. I met a few people and one of those guys became close to me in a very short time. We competed hard against each other and I loved that.
I set a goal: to be able to dunk. I was able to achieve that. That felt great.
I got a job in a mail company doing 5 12-hour nightshifts. For like the past year I've been wanting to get a job with 60 or more hours per week just to see how I would take it.