chiefmitch88
Active Member
Mech,
Firstly, I would like to prove you wrong about your conversational skills.
You might not be the wordsmith of the group but that does not take away from the value of your opinion as a person with a completely unique set of life experiences. As far as your dullness and lack of intellect I think that is the lack of self esteem talking. We know from our forays into the realm of digital erotica that its use eventually results in a general dissatisfaction and diminished confidence.
In my case I falsely believed that if I wasn't doing it like a pornstar then my sex life was mundane or that my masculinity was in question. When I wasn't getting what I felt that I deserved in the bedroom at home I turned to porn/chatrooms to scratch that itch, like I had done when I was single. This resulted in an increase of social anxiety and isolation from everyone, including my wife. I used marijuana (and still do) to help overcome the awkwardness. At least I could laugh at life when I smoked. MJ is what I partake in when I want to party so I cannot cast any stones in your direction. I get it. I feel like I will be a less creative person if I give it up.
My counselor talks alot about filling all of my new found time with endeavors that will renew me spiritually. And that could mean anything for anyone. For me, I have always enjoyed art, my parents have done it on the side my whole life and it really puts me in a calm state of mind when I am doing something creative with my hands. Hence, the registration in a few art classes. Rather than occupy all of my time working for the almighty dollar I am finding happiness in thinking outside of the box and seeking experiences rather than material wealth. I hope to use these skills to transfer into a more fulfilling career eventually. I'm not setting any records trying to be a zen master but I am taking small steps in the right direction. Also, the people that I interact with at these classes are usually more interested in art than in partying so it helps to keep me on track. The people we surround ourselves with is integral to our healing process in my opinion.
Your life is your own, only you have control and know what is best. I just don't want to see you trade one addiction for another my friend.
Firstly, I would like to prove you wrong about your conversational skills.
You might not be the wordsmith of the group but that does not take away from the value of your opinion as a person with a completely unique set of life experiences. As far as your dullness and lack of intellect I think that is the lack of self esteem talking. We know from our forays into the realm of digital erotica that its use eventually results in a general dissatisfaction and diminished confidence.
In my case I falsely believed that if I wasn't doing it like a pornstar then my sex life was mundane or that my masculinity was in question. When I wasn't getting what I felt that I deserved in the bedroom at home I turned to porn/chatrooms to scratch that itch, like I had done when I was single. This resulted in an increase of social anxiety and isolation from everyone, including my wife. I used marijuana (and still do) to help overcome the awkwardness. At least I could laugh at life when I smoked. MJ is what I partake in when I want to party so I cannot cast any stones in your direction. I get it. I feel like I will be a less creative person if I give it up.
My counselor talks alot about filling all of my new found time with endeavors that will renew me spiritually. And that could mean anything for anyone. For me, I have always enjoyed art, my parents have done it on the side my whole life and it really puts me in a calm state of mind when I am doing something creative with my hands. Hence, the registration in a few art classes. Rather than occupy all of my time working for the almighty dollar I am finding happiness in thinking outside of the box and seeking experiences rather than material wealth. I hope to use these skills to transfer into a more fulfilling career eventually. I'm not setting any records trying to be a zen master but I am taking small steps in the right direction. Also, the people that I interact with at these classes are usually more interested in art than in partying so it helps to keep me on track. The people we surround ourselves with is integral to our healing process in my opinion.
Your life is your own, only you have control and know what is best. I just don't want to see you trade one addiction for another my friend.
