Reboot on 24 Jan 19

[Null1011]

Day 8:
I saw progress. Lately I have had a good amount of energy, enthusiasm, and will to look at the better side of things, and looking at ways for general development. And my dick has been semi hard to hard these days.

Today at some point I couldn't endure more and the thought of rewarding myself a little bit felt like okay. So I did that quickly and moved onto other works without keeping on indulging in it. I know I slipped, but I feel that I empowered and chose to reward myself a little instead of the other way that has been driving me all these years into an endless cycle of PMO. I will go longer this time.

@jixu
Thanks man for the positive words. I am trying to improve day by day and people here are very supportive. It is going to be hard but that's the gist of life isn't it.

 

[Null1011]

Phase N, Day 2

It was a good day. Met a childhood friend. It felt really good revisiting childhood memories. So many things I've forgotten over the years.
Another note, now random girls start to look at me. I dont know how, all these years girls were just passing by pretending I am not there. But now quite a times I've had eye contact. (Though I minded my buissness and moved on)

 

[Null1011]

Phase N+1: Day 1
I relapsed. Couldn't help. Looked into some erotica not the hardcore stuff. Feeling ashamed.

 

[Null1011]

13th July

I have been on endless PMO cycle. I am going harder this time. Trashing up all files that I have saved over the years from various sources. Going to improve my diet plan and stop over indulging. Hope I can remain pure this time.

 

[rob24]

13th July

I have been on endless PMO cycle. I am going harder this time. Trashing up all files that I have saved over the years from various sources. Going to improve my diet plan and stop over indulging. Hope I can remain pure this time.

Glad to hear you're still at it despite setbacks! There's nothing more inspiring than one who, despite setbacks, continues toward a goal. The most inspiring story I've heard was of a person who, after years of trying to not relapse, finally made it to a 15 day streak. Good luck!

 

[Null1011]

A year has gone by since I have started this thread, and got nowhere close to the purpose. Despite the endless PMO I?ve had over the days, professionally I am doing great, but personally I am broken. I don?t feel happy inside anymore, eventhough I have accomplished much in my work past year. I think it is going to be too late to change myself if I don?t act now, and for starters break free from this endless PMO cycle. Let?s hope for the best. Thank you for your support.

 

[Null1011]

Visiting the forum after years. Relapsed all the way! The problem is that when I end up refraining for like a day or till a week, I feel very low, uninterested in things around, etc., and this makes me go to back to porn (even though I don't like seeing it anymore). I know I have to get back on track, or else might fuck up my life bad. So I'm restarting the journal to keep track.

 

[Fruit cocktail Samurai]

As long as you keep getting back up. Never give up.

 

[iwander]

Visiting the forum after years. Relapsed all the way! The problem is that when I end up refraining for like a day or till a week, I feel very low, uninterested in things around, etc., and this makes me go to back to porn (even though I don't like seeing it anymore). I know I have to get back on track, or else might fuck up my life bad. So I'm restarting the journal to keep track.

You gotta accept those feelings when they hit you. Not fight them, but accept. It helps to me when I say something like "yeah that's okey I feel [blank], cause [blank] and [blank]. It [emotion blank] you and you have a right to feel that". And after you accept these feelings you can act again. And welcome again, people here more that anyone know what you fighting with and would support you.

 

[creativenothing]

Visiting the forum after years. Relapsed all the way! The problem is that when I end up refraining for like a day or till a week, I feel very low, uninterested in things around, etc., and this makes me go to back to porn (even though I don't like seeing it anymore). I know I have to get back on track, or else might fuck up my life bad. So I'm restarting the journal to keep track.

I too have been an on and off relapser. I have been creating new journals and accounts here over the years. Let's get out of this cycle together. Overcoming this won't just benefit oureselves, but we will be so much more available to others to make this world a better place.