PeterPoland
Member
Hello. My name is Peter and I am from Poland. 26 years old of age.. Nowadays, my life sucks due to social anxiety, depression and yes... pornography addiction. I dont know if my pornography habit made my social anxiety worse or creates depression. It might help, but i doubt it was a main cause, because i was bullied a lot, changed 1 school, neve had a girlfriend.. I mean I had once for nearl 2 months , but i broke up with her. I liked her not loved, she wanted somethimg more.. or maybe I was terrified due to my depression, panic attacks and erection problems with her so i couldnt open into relationship and felt very low self esteem.. Ok, enough of this drama. In general, my life is very tough. I drank a lot of alcohol, but I could quit with ease.. porn is 10000x more addictive than alcohol. Sorry for writing above about my mental state, but i needed to throw it out from myself somehow... lets finally talk about porn.
Its September 2019. I have seen a first porn video in 2006 at the age of 13. I remember even know what was the first video and who was there.. I got hooked. 2007 2008 I was downloading thousand of images, searching porn and finding about the best actresses. It was bad but not as bad as after 2009 when youtube has started. All in all, before tube sites I download tb of porn. For me the most addictive and of course most enjoyable were point of view videos... Watching it constantly, I remember I didnt go to school and watch porn for 5 hours or while actually skipping school and walking alone in the city i was watching it... I installed k9, wanted to quit, but each time I quit whenever something bad happened or when I feel bad i come back to porn reinstall or install k9 all the time. It looks like there are two sides of me. One is craving porn every second ans second one wants to be finally free! It is very hard to quit this. Especially if you have social anxiety, depression or paniv attacks. Beware of porn. This is my advice. If you are suffering from mental health problem it will leave you even more isolated and feeling bad.. I am not kidding with this and I want to quit it so bad, but I cant. Hard cravings and temptations, literally porn video scenes played in my dreams...My record is merely 20 days... 13 years is half of my age. A lot of porn. I can easily. Write 100 or 200 actresses names.. I watched again Gary Wilson, Noah and Gabe sfuff and would like to quit this finally for good! I hope this time I can make it. I will write posts here after each 7 days. Thank you for reading this long post, greetings from Poland. Oh, I havent told this yet about myself. Porn is not only my habit. I love sport. I cycled 8000 km by bicycle in 6 months, enjoy swimming and jn general being active. But i need to get rid of THIS bs activity. If i dont I think i will never build a real and strong confidence in me and destroy depression, loneliness and social anxiety which are very hard to live with itself (even without porn).
Its September 2019. I have seen a first porn video in 2006 at the age of 13. I remember even know what was the first video and who was there.. I got hooked. 2007 2008 I was downloading thousand of images, searching porn and finding about the best actresses. It was bad but not as bad as after 2009 when youtube has started. All in all, before tube sites I download tb of porn. For me the most addictive and of course most enjoyable were point of view videos... Watching it constantly, I remember I didnt go to school and watch porn for 5 hours or while actually skipping school and walking alone in the city i was watching it... I installed k9, wanted to quit, but each time I quit whenever something bad happened or when I feel bad i come back to porn reinstall or install k9 all the time. It looks like there are two sides of me. One is craving porn every second ans second one wants to be finally free! It is very hard to quit this. Especially if you have social anxiety, depression or paniv attacks. Beware of porn. This is my advice. If you are suffering from mental health problem it will leave you even more isolated and feeling bad.. I am not kidding with this and I want to quit it so bad, but I cant. Hard cravings and temptations, literally porn video scenes played in my dreams...My record is merely 20 days... 13 years is half of my age. A lot of porn. I can easily. Write 100 or 200 actresses names.. I watched again Gary Wilson, Noah and Gabe sfuff and would like to quit this finally for good! I hope this time I can make it. I will write posts here after each 7 days. Thank you for reading this long post, greetings from Poland. Oh, I havent told this yet about myself. Porn is not only my habit. I love sport. I cycled 8000 km by bicycle in 6 months, enjoy swimming and jn general being active. But i need to get rid of THIS bs activity. If i dont I think i will never build a real and strong confidence in me and destroy depression, loneliness and social anxiety which are very hard to live with itself (even without porn).