The new beginning

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Micka333

New Member
Hello guys, I am willing to share my story with you’ll.
I am a girl, 20 years old.
it all started at a very very young age. I used to have some awkward moments of intimacy with people but never had sex and watch P a lot.
as I growing up I wanted to stop watching P, sometimes I set my self challenges and deadlines, none those had worked.
I was born in a Christian family, I used to go to church but never took it seriously.
when I was 14 I started to take Christianity seriously and I got baptized when I was 15, even though I devoted myself to the Lord I always had this battle with watching P, this led me sometimes to neglected my faith and relationship with God because I was so ashamed of what I had done in the pass and for what I had been doing.
I always encourage myself to keep praying and find a way to stop this nightmare, everytime I wanted to stop I relapsed again. I can’t even last a week without watching it. I tried everything.
last month I even downloaded several apps on my phone so I can stop watching it but i couldn’t resist, I always feel guilty after watching it.
3 days ago was the last time I watched it but 20 minutes ago I relapsed again, that’s when I realized i actually need help, so I googled communities online that can help me with that and I founds this site.
Guys, I actually want to overcome that addiction, I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel lost, I feel pain, depressed, I feel like there is no sense to breath anymore.
Even though I watch P but I never masturbating and had sex in my life, I never feel the need to do it but what’s killing me is watching P.
So today I will start this journey again, and I will keep you guys updated, and if you have any advice please share with me.
 
C

canguro

Active Member
Hello and welcome to the forum =)
I can highly advise you to read the book "your brain on porn"! The book is written mostly for men, as we are the majority of addicts, but I think it is beneficial nontheless. Or watch the Ted Talk on Youtube by gary wilson. The Huberman Lab Podcast about addiction was also highly beneficial for me. Understanding the science behind the addiction was crucial for me to take an objective stance instead of blaming me for my failure. I think that's very important, because for you it is also a moral dilemma, as it is for me (although for political reasons in my case). But as long as we are just seeing it as a personal failure to our believes, we can't succeed because we are stuck in a shame spiral which causes us to relapse.
Stay strong!
 
E

Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
canguro said:
Hello and welcome to the forum =)
I can highly advise you to read the book "your brain on porn"! The book is written mostly for men, as we are the majority of addicts, but I think it is beneficial nontheless. Or watch the Ted Talk on Youtube by gary wilson. The Huberman Lab Podcast about addiction was also highly beneficial for me. Understanding the science behind the addiction was crucial for me to take an objective stance instead of blaming me for my failure. I think that's very important, because for you it is also a moral dilemma, as it is for me (although for political reasons in my case). But as long as we are just seeing it as a personal failure to our believes, we can't succeed because we are stuck in a shame spiral which causes us to relapse.
Stay strong!
Click to expand...
Yes, information is very important. Read everything you can, watch everything you can. The book "Your brain on porn" is an excellent beginning, as well as "Easy Peasy method". I recommend both.
 
F

fapstranaut02

Active Member
They are right, educating yourself in this topic is very important.
When they break their reboot the blame is placed on the lack of willpower, in fact, by relying on willpower in the brute force manner will surely result in failure. To be successful one must study rebooting knowledge and read articles about rebooting in order to raise one?s awareness and the level of determination. With determination we are able to defeat the temptations of the mind, without it we will lack the resistance and surrender ourselves to it
Click to expand...

P is all fun and game until it destroys your perception of real sex, I wish someone taught me that. Quit fast while you're still young.
 
M

Micka333

New Member
canguro said:
Hello and welcome to the forum =)
I can highly advise you to read the book "your brain on porn"! The book is written mostly for men, as we are the majority of addicts, but I think it is beneficial nontheless. Or watch the Ted Talk on Youtube by gary wilson. The Huberman Lab Podcast about addiction was also highly beneficial for me. Understanding the science behind the addiction was crucial for me to take an objective stance instead of blaming me for my failure. I think that's very important, because for you it is also a moral dilemma, as it is for me (although for political reasons in my case). But as long as we are just seeing it as a personal failure to our believes, we can't succeed because we are stuck in a shame spiral which causes us to relapse.
Stay strong!
Click to expand...
Great. Thank you for the information.
wish you success
 
G

Gordon 7

Well-Known Member
Micka333 said:
Hello guys, I am willing to share my story with you’ll.
I am a girl, 20 years old.
it all started at a very very young age. I used to have some awkward moments of intimacy with people but never had sex and watch P a lot.
as I growing up I wanted to stop watching P, sometimes I set my self challenges and deadlines, none those had worked.
I was born in a Christian family, I used to go to church but never took it seriously.
when I was 14 I started to take Christianity seriously and I got baptized when I was 15, even though I devoted myself to the Lord I always had this battle with watching P, this led me sometimes to neglected my faith and relationship with God because I was so ashamed of what I had done in the pass and for what I had been doing.
I always encourage myself to keep praying and find a way to stop this nightmare, everytime I wanted to stop I relapsed again. I can’t even last a week without watching it. I tried everything.
last month I even downloaded several apps on my phone so I can stop watching it but i couldn’t resist, I always feel guilty after watching it.
3 days ago was the last time I watched it but 20 minutes ago I relapsed again, that’s when I realized i actually need help, so I googled communities online that can help me with that and I founds this site.
Guys, I actually want to overcome that addiction, I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel lost, I feel pain, depressed, I feel like there is no sense to breath anymore.
Even though I watch P but I never masturbating and had sex in my life, I never feel the need to do it but what’s killing me is watching P.
So today I will start this journey again, and I will keep you guys updated, and if you have any advice please share with me.
Click to expand...
I wrote a post on a Christian site which I will share. It is called, "Why does God want us to quit?

Did God write a bunch of rules for no reason? Is He watching us to see if we are naughty? Or, is there a war going on? Is there a battle that we are supposed to be fighting in?
If there is, then if I am sitting around watching P I am a deserter. God's army went off to war and I was not aware of it.
There are people on this site, clean for 300 or 500 days commenting on threads and helping others. They know about the war and are "busy," fighting in it.
A good prayer for this is, "Father, take away this spirit of lust and help me to care about souls."
A good exercise to learn better "Purpose," habits, is to turn off the TV for a bit and read. If you have been having success in fighting P, the Purpose Driven Life is great. If you are struggling with P, What The Bible Says About Addiction is great for purpose and it is great for quitting.

The good news is. When we start doing something for God - life gets better and we begin to gain the power we need to quit. I will pray for you.
 
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