They say the first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem…. But I’ve admitted I’ve had a problem for years, but I’m no better for it. But that’s my own fault and starting this time around, I can already feel it’s going to be different.
I’ve struggled with sexual addiction and pornography for as long as I can remember. For me it’s always been a nagging demon in the background of who I am and what I do. At times in my life it’s had a bigger presence and lives more in the foreground, but no matter how hard I’ve tried to suppress and bury it, it always has re-emerged.
I’ve been to therapy and it worked for a while but when I relapsed I stopped therapy because I couldn’t admit to someone else that I had failed. I hate failing and I hate loosing, so for me it was easier just to pretend I hadn’t failed then actually admitting I had failed.
I currently have a good life, family, with a wife that’s been more than patient and forgiving, but even that’s wearing thin. I need to get my crap together or else I could loose all respect that I have from her. In her words, she doesn’t see me “trying” to get better. But she’s distancing herself from me and a agree that there’s more that I need to be doing, but honestly it’s just difficult.
All that said, I’m going to be better! I’m day 3 clean right now, and I’m feeling good. I’m glad I finally found this resource to help me be the best me, porn free. I want to be active on here and help me tell my story so hopefully it will not only help me but I’d love to help others, when I’m finally in the right mind, to succeed on their journey as well!
I’ve struggled with sexual addiction and pornography for as long as I can remember. For me it’s always been a nagging demon in the background of who I am and what I do. At times in my life it’s had a bigger presence and lives more in the foreground, but no matter how hard I’ve tried to suppress and bury it, it always has re-emerged.
I’ve been to therapy and it worked for a while but when I relapsed I stopped therapy because I couldn’t admit to someone else that I had failed. I hate failing and I hate loosing, so for me it was easier just to pretend I hadn’t failed then actually admitting I had failed.
I currently have a good life, family, with a wife that’s been more than patient and forgiving, but even that’s wearing thin. I need to get my crap together or else I could loose all respect that I have from her. In her words, she doesn’t see me “trying” to get better. But she’s distancing herself from me and a agree that there’s more that I need to be doing, but honestly it’s just difficult.
All that said, I’m going to be better! I’m day 3 clean right now, and I’m feeling good. I’m glad I finally found this resource to help me be the best me, porn free. I want to be active on here and help me tell my story so hopefully it will not only help me but I’d love to help others, when I’m finally in the right mind, to succeed on their journey as well!