I've just read your journal for the period beginning 8th December. First of all, good job with the overhaul of the first post in the thread! You've really set out what you want, the problems you've had and why you're doing this. If you're having troubles you can read that back and hopefully it'll give you that push to keep going.
You're doing so well! You've fought off some really heavy urges and even won against your own subconscious. You're really going to get there! It's good that you're finding ways to fill your time. Try to diversify in case you get bored of one thing or the other and just can't bring yourself to do it. You mentioned the guitar, so if you haven't already, why not pick it up and get practicing? Drawing too. That's a great one to get back into. I suck at it myself but on a day when I felt really awful and defeated I just cleared a space at the table, got some paper and a pencil and just let my mind wander and made a design. I felt so much better afterwards and during.
Finally, I'd just like to point out that you really seem to be pinning a lot on this streak. Things are clearly really tough for you at the moment, and I'm sorry to hear that, but this streak is not the only good thing in your life. Think about what you've accomplished in reaching out to your mother after so long and also your prospects for the future. I don't know how your boss' proposition went down, but if it's given you something should the worst happen with your current job, then you can at least know that you've got that. If not, you'll find something new, and it will be a totally fresh start which shouldn't be difficult for you anymore now that you've been able to succeed in making a fresh start in your lifestyle in general.
I'm not saying that this streak isn't important, and of clearly is very important to you. Hold on to it and I really hope this is your 90 day streak, but if you do relapse you will be able to start again, like you've done before. Sure, it's a setback, but you're a stronger man than you were at the start of this journey and each attempt has made you even stronger. Take that built up experience, keep adding to it and keep your eyes on the prize! Think of it this way, if you're practicing the guitar and you break a string it's a setback and you might not play for a while before replacing it, but when you'll still be a guitarist when you do. No sense in burning the guitar instead of replacing the string, right?
You've mentioned thoughts of suicide, and you might want to talk about that with someone. I'm sure there will be free services near to you where you can do that with someone appropriately trained, even if it is just online, but if you'd like to you're welcome to send me a private message if you want to talk to me about it.