Hello to all members.
I found this community 1 day ago and I have been reading a lot of posts and watching a lot of the videos etc.
I have finally had to admit to myself that I am a porn addict and it is causing some serious problems in my life.
I am a 34 year old father. I am also in a long term relationship. My situation has gotten to the point where I feel like I am going to destroy everything if I don't get this under control.
I use porn / chat sites and dating sites frequently to fuel my addiction. I have been using these things for about 7 or 8 years now. I have had trouble with PIED in the past but I have kind of used some techniques to control it. For example, a few years back I had issues where I was having trouble getting it up for "real girls" I then searched on google and found out that many guys had the same problem, i realised that all the porn and masturbating was causing this. A lot of this advice was similar to what it is on here e.g stop porn. So i did, I stopped using porn and masturbating for a week or two and I noticed a huge difference, everything seemed to come back and it didnt take as long as most people were saying, maybe because i didnt view porn until i was in my 20's.
Anyway i found a technique to sort of control it, but still watching the porn and using the other sites. I work away from home, so one week before I know I am coming home, i "detox" by not allowing myself to orgasm. I still watch the porn and masturbate but just not to orgasm. This worked most of the time, but the main problem was that I needed to wait a few days to get back to "normal", and if i PMO'd in that time it wouldnt work very well, by that I mean, it needs constant stimulation to stay up.
Sometimes I loose my erections and occasionally I cant get it to happen without quite a lot of foreplay. I know that the issue is all the P and M, its no accident that when abstain, even for a few days, things are much better in the bedroom.
This is not the only issue for me. As i said I use chat sites and dating sites too. Mainly I use them to find other users to cyber with, but recently I have met a few people for actual encounters. This has resulted in me feeling terrible, and being absolutely terrified that I may have picked something up, I have also used a prostitute. These things are the ultimate reason why I am here. I don't want to be this kind of person. I spend hours and hours of my life trawling chat and dating sites looking for people to talk to who share my ever increasing list of fetishes. I see something in a porn movie that turns me on then I spend hours looking for a person in real life who would be willing to do those things, then when i find them I create a meeting with them, usually that was enough but recently I have actually been meeting a few of these people and this is the make or break time for me because this is a path I really don't want to go down, and thats why im here. I beleive porn is the main factor in influencing me do do these things and causing the functional problems in the bedroom.
I am also begining to hate the person that I have become. I have a vision for myself as the kind of person want to be, and this is not it, at all. I can't even begin to understand how no one knows what I am doing or how I have managed to keep all this secret for so long.
I just wanted to come clean somewhere about myself and my story. I have tried this before but I usually just waited till my erections got batter then went straight back to "using again". It has really seeped into all aspects of my life, I have even looked at these things behind my laptop with a room full of people, on chat sites with my gf next to me, porn with people in the next room, even in the same room with the volume down. I am going to get caught and i know it and it is going to destroy my life.
One of my main issues is the way I work. I work away from home and stay in a hotel where i have access to anything I want with no one there to question me. When I am at home, I study which gives me a great excuse to always be on my laptop, my gf works too so I am free to do what I want with my time at home. I really need to find some kind of project that keeps me away from the internet, ideally it would keep me out of the house too. As i said, i came to P quite late in comparison to many people, therefore i know i can function normally without it, but it has been some years now since I knew how to do that and when I have free will and spare time, I always end up back in the same place.
I have a problem and I need advice on how to keep away from it. I just wanted to get all that out there as I really need this to work this time for the sake of my life and my familys future. Thanks for reading.
I found this community 1 day ago and I have been reading a lot of posts and watching a lot of the videos etc.
I have finally had to admit to myself that I am a porn addict and it is causing some serious problems in my life.
I am a 34 year old father. I am also in a long term relationship. My situation has gotten to the point where I feel like I am going to destroy everything if I don't get this under control.
I use porn / chat sites and dating sites frequently to fuel my addiction. I have been using these things for about 7 or 8 years now. I have had trouble with PIED in the past but I have kind of used some techniques to control it. For example, a few years back I had issues where I was having trouble getting it up for "real girls" I then searched on google and found out that many guys had the same problem, i realised that all the porn and masturbating was causing this. A lot of this advice was similar to what it is on here e.g stop porn. So i did, I stopped using porn and masturbating for a week or two and I noticed a huge difference, everything seemed to come back and it didnt take as long as most people were saying, maybe because i didnt view porn until i was in my 20's.
Anyway i found a technique to sort of control it, but still watching the porn and using the other sites. I work away from home, so one week before I know I am coming home, i "detox" by not allowing myself to orgasm. I still watch the porn and masturbate but just not to orgasm. This worked most of the time, but the main problem was that I needed to wait a few days to get back to "normal", and if i PMO'd in that time it wouldnt work very well, by that I mean, it needs constant stimulation to stay up.
Sometimes I loose my erections and occasionally I cant get it to happen without quite a lot of foreplay. I know that the issue is all the P and M, its no accident that when abstain, even for a few days, things are much better in the bedroom.
This is not the only issue for me. As i said I use chat sites and dating sites too. Mainly I use them to find other users to cyber with, but recently I have met a few people for actual encounters. This has resulted in me feeling terrible, and being absolutely terrified that I may have picked something up, I have also used a prostitute. These things are the ultimate reason why I am here. I don't want to be this kind of person. I spend hours and hours of my life trawling chat and dating sites looking for people to talk to who share my ever increasing list of fetishes. I see something in a porn movie that turns me on then I spend hours looking for a person in real life who would be willing to do those things, then when i find them I create a meeting with them, usually that was enough but recently I have actually been meeting a few of these people and this is the make or break time for me because this is a path I really don't want to go down, and thats why im here. I beleive porn is the main factor in influencing me do do these things and causing the functional problems in the bedroom.
I am also begining to hate the person that I have become. I have a vision for myself as the kind of person want to be, and this is not it, at all. I can't even begin to understand how no one knows what I am doing or how I have managed to keep all this secret for so long.
I just wanted to come clean somewhere about myself and my story. I have tried this before but I usually just waited till my erections got batter then went straight back to "using again". It has really seeped into all aspects of my life, I have even looked at these things behind my laptop with a room full of people, on chat sites with my gf next to me, porn with people in the next room, even in the same room with the volume down. I am going to get caught and i know it and it is going to destroy my life.
One of my main issues is the way I work. I work away from home and stay in a hotel where i have access to anything I want with no one there to question me. When I am at home, I study which gives me a great excuse to always be on my laptop, my gf works too so I am free to do what I want with my time at home. I really need to find some kind of project that keeps me away from the internet, ideally it would keep me out of the house too. As i said, i came to P quite late in comparison to many people, therefore i know i can function normally without it, but it has been some years now since I knew how to do that and when I have free will and spare time, I always end up back in the same place.
I have a problem and I need advice on how to keep away from it. I just wanted to get all that out there as I really need this to work this time for the sake of my life and my familys future. Thanks for reading.