Reboot or perish!

[kook__]

Thank you Conquistador, I follow your progress too

Day 31&32

Well spent time with my mom, went to church and had nice lunch, later she texted me how she is glad I was at home even just for two days. Wished my dad happy fathers day Afternoon and evening studied in train.

Monday was really quick, had my shift on clinic, some stuff done and invited my friend for birthday dinner Rest of evening I was with her, nothing sexual happened, we just enjoyed each other Nowhere to rush. Watched football and did some school work. Went to sleep really late.

 

[kook__]

DAY 33&34&35

Whaat a rush has been these days. Succesfully passed my last exam and summer can come! Feeling generally good, had strong wet dream last night and MW reflect lower stress levels. Personally, nothing compares to peace of mind and Im gonna keep it up Tomorrow traveling back home and looking forward to some sports as I didn't do anything physically for almost 3 weeks. 

Hang in there guys

 

[FixingMyPenis]

Awesome work.

 

[kook__]

Thank you!

DAY 36&37

Didn't go home and stayed in town. Got a visit from my British friends and partied till six in the morning I usually don't get so much attention from girls as I did this night. Even got some suggestions from this blonde but resisted as the whole thing isn't just physical for me and there were definitely not much emotions involved. Maybe it is just my actual mindset, but I think I would regret staying with her just for sex and leaving in the morning. But all the women eyeing and erections through the night encouraged me to continue the journey I am on

On Saturday slept half of the day and the another tried to survive mild hangover that affected especially my stomach by watching football and drinking water Evening spent with this girl friend I mentioned above. Things are going pretty well, even if there are no committmens, I am thinking about future with her. Nowhere to rush though

 

[kook__]

DAY 38&39

The heavy drinking wasn't one of the best ideas I didn't do it often, but this last session brought me mild depression on Sunday and Monday's morning. I need to decrease my ammount of drinks per night cause I find myself not so controlable lately.

I notice my women objectizing problem is getting better and Im really glad for it. I spent another evening with this friend and feel pretty good. Had some random erections and can feel the presence of her

Today Im gonna study for my last exam. I hope that tomorrow will go finally home and get some rest and sports

Have a good one

 

[demetriusvii]

Wow dude ! that's terrific !!

You are fighting this battle, then you have proper socializing which really helps this. almost 40 days man, so proud of yer ! and im glad you made those mature decisions on dealing with other girls. it would have messed you up in the inside.

I'm glad also you are thinking of more future with this person. take your time with her, no rush, improve your friendship. look forward to hear more good news man ! very happy ! cheers

 

[kook__]

Thank you for your caring words Demetrius

Last few days were pretty interesting. Remember the girl I'm talking about everytime? Well, last time we were together she approached and kissed me few times. Is this a happyend to our story? I don't know, but honestly I didn't feel over the moon after that when I got home. Actually, I felt sorry about her. Why? I can't help myself, but for now I am really not into this relationship thing. She is amazing, we have great communication, there are many things about her I find great. Altough, there is something missing. I don't want to lie to myself and to her. It's ok for me being alone, I have alot of support and love from home, I haven't need of this kind of intimacy NOW. We are gonna be separated for at least two weeks because we live in different cities and I hope in prayer and honesty of my heart I will figure out some way to tell her and get her not hurt as much as possible.

After tough two months I have finally some time to relax. I was swimming yesterday and it felt like I was born in water Had great lunch, slept in the afternoon, feeling absolutely free. Today I'm gonna work out.

With this stressfree mindset there are of course more space for urges to kick in. Actually, not PMO urges but somehow them mixed with hornyness. I've been checking almost every woman, especially older ones I've been attracted to in my P life, walking by me even when I realize using them just for sex will be just egoistic as PMO and eventually not satisfying. I want to stay faithful to my future wife. I am aware of many benefits of doing so. If it was that easy right? I don't know if I'm gonna make it. But I promise, my darling, I will try. The real battle starts now.

Thanks for reading guys

 

[kook__]

Fighting some bad urges right now. Started with this new music video by Fergie, watched some YT related videos and fantasized. But I am not gonna give up on me and you too! Going to do something distracting right away.

 

[kook__]

Today the toughest time so far. Third day at home alone and nothing much to do. Got through filter few times and googled for some P related stuff. Although needed some time to get the password right haha Luckily it didn't escalated to some kind of binging but I wasn't too far from giving up. Went out and played football and I was astonished what a performance and moves I managed to do. Was the most scoring player which isn't very common to happen as I am trained goalkeeper. Coincidence? I don't think so I think it saved my streak and progress. Hope I will somehow save it during next days

 

[kook__]

Another not much successful day. Little few minutes peeking there and here with bad feelings afterwards just reminded me how deep I am still down there. Not sure if I'm gonna make it, right now don't even know if I want to make it. Was swimming and it was really helpful. Lot of nice women to notice too. Please God, how am I supposed to handle this?

 

[kook__]

A little better one today. Well spent morning in church and at lunch with my parents. Pretty calm afternoon with just one short peek, no edging. Great work-out, I would like to feel more motivated but it will come. Tomorrow going to music festival I was looking forward to for few months. Out of routine, it's gonna be awesome Gonna pack myself now and watch some movie or tv show.

This motivaton and willpower are getting stronger throughout reboot. I have to think about it before I will be tempted to fall again.

See you on Sunady

e: aand some anxieties and unability to communicate with friend spontaneously and funny as I am used to...man, you are stupid!

 

[kook__]

Reboot gave me better concentration and thinking, bright mind, sexual energy I feel radiating from me, bigger self consciousness, motivation, comunication and care for others.

Just letting my tempted self know, why I want to avoid this poison of soul and body. The goal is to stay clear today.

 

[kook__]

Last few days I didn't have access to PC so no urges at all Now I know my triggers better, even sitting in front of laptop in certain position made my heart going faster.

I realized how my sexual taste was conditioned by P. That it has been only looking for real versions of my favourite category of pixels. Without real care for other or seeing her as a person.

Got slightly drunk last night, hung out with friends, danced with a girl I haven't seen in long time and gosh she was hot! Didn't wake up to hospital, crushed my phone screen and feeling a bit anxious right now (that's quite common state after drinking). But it was worth it

Stay strong guys!

 

[kook__]

Hello there

Straight to the point. In the past two weeks I passed my filter about three times and watched P for few minutes. No edging, M or O. I consider it as a relapse and reset my counter even I don't feel it as major setback. The only issue I see is stressful waking up which is familiar to me. Would like to avoid these episodes in the future. Slowly falling in love with this girl friend and want to be faithful to her by not connecting emotionally or physically with pixels. I am not giving up this fight!

 

[kook__]

Hey how have you been?

Last week I spent on beautiful holiday in Croatia. Felt no urges at all and was able to really enjoy every moment there. Well back to reality Had some work done today, went swimming yesterday and now going hiking with my lovely friend. Libido is raisin but in a good, healthy way. Following weeks are gonna be pretty busy so I hope it will help me fight these demons we are all strugglig with.

 

[kook__]

Few mild anxieties and stresses lately, trying not to overcome them with binge eating but rather swimming, reading or any meaningful activity. We got together with this girl friend who will be girlfriend from now on I don't live this through very emotionally right now, although I'm very glad we started this together. She is beautiful, intelligent and we great communicate what I appreciate the most. Staying faithful to her by not falling for some fake pixels.

 

[kook__]

Checkin in after well spent and productive holidays. It's almost four months I haven't touched myself. Went traveling, on internships, out with friends and looking forward to my gf whom I didn't see for three weeks. Atm going through mild anxieties after night out and drinking pretty much. New semester starts in one week and trying to healthy habituate myself to sports, reading, learning languages and playing guitar.

Cheers to all you fighters!

 

[kook__]

Relapsed after 75 days by watching and edging on P for about 5 minutes. Its massive how such little action can change so many things. Mainly its withdrawal anxiety that bothers me right now and loss of inner peace. It definitely has some influence on relationship with my gf too as Im not so communicative and present with her. I was provoked and strongly urged by drinking the previous night and fantasizing about woman I saw in tram after that. Must control both of these actions for me and my gfs sake, especially the alcohol.

I have to be honest to myself, reset counter and try again. Lets go

 

[kook__]

Going through same process again. Bad dreams, slight anxieties from time to time. Scary how it can change your brain. Nevermind, going through

 

[kook__]

For the last month I relapsed three times with small ammount of P, thank god didn't edge. But it's the same as with any other drugs. You just can't tolerate even a little. At least in past seven months, except last relapses, I didn't touch myself which I consider as huge victory.

We have really nice and fulfilling realtionship with my GF. We communicate alot and have really much in common. Infidelity, even virtual, has no place between us. This one is definitely on me. Staying faithful to her and eventually to my future wife is my number one priority!

Good luck warriors