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Chip
Guest
Congrats on 40! Sorry I'm late to post.
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
Thanks Chip! I didn't realize you already reached more then 60 days! Great achievement!
I know I can too! Thanks for your support!
I know I can too! Thanks for your support!
RuntoSpirit
Active Member
You are right, the dark passenger only wants to steal from you. Kill it off. YOu may need to mourn its loss even though there is nothing about it that is your friend. You have felt that it was your friend though and that is why you are reluctant to see it go. You do know the truth though and will act accordingly.
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
I had successful sex last night! ;D For the first time in years i could keep it up long enough zo i could penetrate. Unfortunatly i suffered from PE but i'm still happy with the progress. This morning we tried again but this time I had DE....
Anyway, i have proven to myself that leaving porn behind was the best decision i've made in my life!
I can probably fix the PE and DE issues over time
Anyway, i have proven to myself that leaving porn behind was the best decision i've made in my life!
I can probably fix the PE and DE issues over time
Anothertry
Active Member
Great news! So inspiring to read your journal.
And I know your're right, even the big cravings pass. I often say to myself that if I've got though 2 weeks I've got through at least one period where the cravings are as intense as they can get. So I know I can do it. I just need to keep going and it'll get easier.
Another thought I've had reading your journal is that it is worth remembering however big and scary those cravings seem they are as harmless as flies. It's like the Wizard of Oz - he speaks in a really big, booming voice but he's just a little guy....it's an illusion that he seems so powerful.
What do I mean by this? Well, cravings can be very intense. But not a single craving can make us do what it wants. It relies on us giving in. If we simply say, 'thanks but no thanks', what can that craving do? Its as harmless as a fly! Big booming voice...but just a little old wizard....
Anyway glad to hear you're doing so well.
AT.
And I know your're right, even the big cravings pass. I often say to myself that if I've got though 2 weeks I've got through at least one period where the cravings are as intense as they can get. So I know I can do it. I just need to keep going and it'll get easier.
Another thought I've had reading your journal is that it is worth remembering however big and scary those cravings seem they are as harmless as flies. It's like the Wizard of Oz - he speaks in a really big, booming voice but he's just a little guy....it's an illusion that he seems so powerful.
What do I mean by this? Well, cravings can be very intense. But not a single craving can make us do what it wants. It relies on us giving in. If we simply say, 'thanks but no thanks', what can that craving do? Its as harmless as a fly! Big booming voice...but just a little old wizard....
Anyway glad to hear you're doing so well.
AT.
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
Thanks AT! Looks like you are making big progress now also because you are use strong words. You're not 'trying' but 'doing' it! Thats great, you are showing great commitment and I know now you will reach your goal!
Really like the analogy between the wizard of oz, its big and booming at first bust and the end of the golden road it's just a small meaningless voice.
Really like the analogy between the wizard of oz, its big and booming at first bust and the end of the golden road it's just a small meaningless voice.
RuntoSpirit
Active Member
Regarding dealing with beautiful women as triggers. Many guys to the "bounce the eye" technique. I have used that to some good effect, but frankly it got to be weird for me as if I was afraid to let my gaze fall on a woman who was walking right in front of me.
I figured if I could see a man walking in front of me I could see a woman who was in the same location. What I do now is simply wish them well in my mind as I see them without letting my gaze linger any longer than I would if it were a man crossing my field of vision. This way I am doing something to occupy my mind and it breaks the objectifying of women that happens from porn when I am only seeing them good for one thing.
I figured if I could see a man walking in front of me I could see a woman who was in the same location. What I do now is simply wish them well in my mind as I see them without letting my gaze linger any longer than I would if it were a man crossing my field of vision. This way I am doing something to occupy my mind and it breaks the objectifying of women that happens from porn when I am only seeing them good for one thing.
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
I don't know the exact length of my longest streak until now, but it was arround 7 weeks. So it's safe to say now this has been the longest porn-free period since my adolesence. And this time it feels like it's going to last.
I accidently saw a naked woman on tv in a non sexual way but i didn't fall for it, even though it was still a quite attractive woman. i didn't even really feel the rush of dopamine. This makes me feel very strong! Still want to avoid seeing naked bodies or anything other that migth trigger me for a while but i'm sure doing very fine now!
And this time it feels like it's going to last.I accidently saw a naked woman on tv in a non sexual way but i didn't fall for it, even though it was still a quite attractive woman. i didn't even really feel the rush of dopamine. This makes me feel very strong! Still want to avoid seeing naked bodies or anything other that migth trigger me for a while but i'm sure doing very fine now!
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Chip
Guest
your doing great, top of your game. We can't avoid every situation but the more we practice keeping ourselves in check instead of just devouring women with our eyes, the better equipped we are for challenges. Good work.NoMorePr0n said:I don't know the exact length of my longest streak until now, but it was arround 7 weeks. So it's safe to say now this has been the longest porn-free period since my adolesence.
I accidently saw a naked woman on tv in a non sexual way but i didn't fall for it, even though it was still a quite attractive woman. i didn't even really feel the rush of dopamine. This makes me feel very strong! Still want to avoid seeing naked bodies or anything other that migth trigger me for a while but i'm sure doing very fine now!
NoMorePron that sounds like a great plan.
Actually I need to see myself as loveable and dateable too, that will help with the willpower. Whenever I feel sorry for myself or feel unloveable it's very easy to go back to porn.
When I see a beautiful woman I just look away really fast. I don't leer anymore. Maybe imagine your sister (or moher) as one of these beautiful women, meaning if your sister were in that woman's situation, would you like some guy leering at her? I just thought of that one right now. I gotta remember it.
Keep up the great work! Rooting for ya here!
Actually I need to see myself as loveable and dateable too, that will help with the willpower. Whenever I feel sorry for myself or feel unloveable it's very easy to go back to porn.
When I see a beautiful woman I just look away really fast. I don't leer anymore. Maybe imagine your sister (or moher) as one of these beautiful women, meaning if your sister were in that woman's situation, would you like some guy leering at her? I just thought of that one right now. I gotta remember it.
Keep up the great work! Rooting for ya here!
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Chip
Guest
Delerium said:NoMorePron that sounds like a great plan.
Actually I need to see myself as loveable and dateable too, that will help with the willpower. Whenever I feel sorry for myself or feel unloveable it's very easy to go back to porn.
When I see a beautiful woman I just look away really fast. I don't leer anymore. Maybe imagine your sister (or moher) as one of these beautiful women, meaning if your sister were in that woman's situation, would you like some guy leering at her? I just thought of that one right now. I gotta remember it.
Keep up the great work! Rooting for ya here!
I agree with what you said in regards to how we see ourselves being important. You are spot on that seeing us as bad is not helpful. I've noticed along my journey, the further I go, the further I get past 40 days, the better I feel. I feel more masculine, more virile and my confidence increases daily. Porn drains our masculinity and steals our virility, leaving it in a tissue in the toilet. Men, I promise if you stay the course, the rewards, the blessings, are plenty.
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
Right now I'm at 99.9% of my original goal of 60 days , which is very good.
But it is not enough. I don't know exactly why but just today my cravings which have been dormant for a few weeks are bullying me again. I is as if my mind is telling me: "ok, you have proven yourself, you reached your goal, now get back to porn, you deserve your reward". But of course I know porn is never the reward that I need or deserve. So I decided that I'm to continue being on this forum for at least 30 more days until I reach 90 days.
Thanks for everyone on this forum, you have all been helpful to reach this 'halfway' goal and I want to express my thanks to you all for being here. For yourself, me and all the others that are fighting our common enemy porn.
Cheers, NMP
, which is very good.But it is not enough. I don't know exactly why but just today my cravings which have been dormant for a few weeks are bullying me again. I is as if my mind is telling me: "ok, you have proven yourself, you reached your goal, now get back to porn, you deserve your reward". But of course I know porn is never the reward that I need or deserve. So I decided that I'm to continue being on this forum for at least 30 more days until I reach 90 days.
Thanks for everyone on this forum, you have all been helpful to reach this 'halfway' goal and I want to express my thanks to you all for being here. For yourself, me and all the others that are fighting our common enemy porn.
Cheers, NMP
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Chip
Guest
I had a tough patch between 40-50, just from lingering too long on a documentary that regrettably had some nudity in it. Stay focused, it gets smoother up around 75. Good job on 60 Days.
RuntoSpirit
Active Member
Good on you for your 60 days. It sounds as though even though the cravings weren't pleasant that you handled them appropriately. Feel good about that measure of self-control demonstrated. Will look forward to journeying withyhou another 30 days and to yoru continued recovery.
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
I'm not doing well at the moment and am on the brink of giving in to porn... :-\
I was feeling stronger and stronger every day the last few weeks and at one point I thought nothing could really bring me down anymore.
But then last Saturday I had my window open to let in the cool air. I looked outside and accidentally saw what what my neighbor across the street was watching because his window was opened too. He was watching porn. At the moment I saw this I couldn't look away and my heart started to pounding like crazy. Luckily the view was somewhat obscured so I could get a really good look at it, also because of the distance, but it clearly was porn .
I wasn't expecting porn to still have such a strong effect on me.
I would probably have broken early in the reboot but the thought that it would be real stupid to give in after more then 60 days and after having tasted already so many of the benefits of not watching porn kept me on my feet so far.
I know these cravings will pass but they are the worst in a long time...I'm definitely not healed yet
Still....this is what I want... a live without porn... gotta keep going but it's hard right now
I was feeling stronger and stronger every day the last few weeks and at one point I thought nothing could really bring me down anymore.
But then last Saturday I had my window open to let in the cool air. I looked outside and accidentally saw what what my neighbor across the street was watching because his window was opened too. He was watching porn. At the moment I saw this I couldn't look away and my heart started to pounding like crazy. Luckily the view was somewhat obscured so I could get a really good look at it, also because of the distance, but it clearly was porn .
I wasn't expecting porn to still have such a strong effect on me.
I would probably have broken early in the reboot but the thought that it would be real stupid to give in after more then 60 days and after having tasted already so many of the benefits of not watching porn kept me on my feet so far.
I know these cravings will pass but they are the worst in a long time...I'm definitely not healed yet
Still....this is what I want... a live without porn... gotta keep going but it's hard right now
RuntoSpirit
Active Member
Hey No MOre.
YOu caught yourself and so count this a victory. Also you got a good lesson on how pron still affects you... not that you are to fear that, but you have some first hand information that you cannot play with it. We are like alcoholics. Other people can have a drink, but one drink affects us more than it does non-alcoholics.
But that is ok as we know that there is no ueful purpose for porn anyway so it is out of our life for good.
Also, seeing someone else watch porn "gives us permission" to do the same. BUT when this happened to you, you still resisted. Your recovery so far has indeed given you some strength worth talking about,.
Cheers to your recovery.
YOu caught yourself and so count this a victory. Also you got a good lesson on how pron still affects you... not that you are to fear that, but you have some first hand information that you cannot play with it. We are like alcoholics. Other people can have a drink, but one drink affects us more than it does non-alcoholics.
But that is ok as we know that there is no ueful purpose for porn anyway so it is out of our life for good.
Also, seeing someone else watch porn "gives us permission" to do the same. BUT when this happened to you, you still resisted. Your recovery so far has indeed given you some strength worth talking about,.
Cheers to your recovery.
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Chip
Guest
I don't think being healed will ever diminish the rush porn provides, its scientifically impossible. Your brain, the part that is stimulated by the female form, only sees sex, it can't make the determination that its artificial or actual. That's why its important we do our best to control what we let our brains see... I made the same mistake with a documentary I mentioned in an earlier posts. Just a few seconds of nudity and I struggled for 10 days. I have no idea if you are religious or a Christian, but what finally helped me regain my balance was confessing it to God and reading 1 John 1:9.NoMorePr0n said:I'm not doing well at the moment and am on the brink of giving in to porn... :-\
I was feeling stronger and stronger every day the last few weeks and at one point I thought nothing could really bring me down anymore.
But then last Saturday I had my window open to let in the cool air. I looked outside and accidentally saw what what my neighbor across the street was watching because his window was opened too. He was watching porn. At the moment I saw this I couldn't look away and my heart started to pounding like crazy. Luckily the view was somewhat obscured so I could get a really good look at it, also because of the distance, but it clearly was porn .
I wasn't expecting porn to still have such a strong effect on me.
I would probably have broken early in the reboot but the thought that it would be real stupid to give in after more then 60 days and after having tasted already so many of the benefits of not watching porn kept me on my feet so far.
I know these cravings will pass but they are the worst in a long time...I'm definitely not healed yet
Still....this is what I want... a live without porn... gotta keep going but it's hard right now
Know this, the female form and the hope of sex will always stimulate you, that's a good thing, but we have to be mature and honest and take care not to feed our libido any artificial sugar, like porn or p-subs. I know we all kinda wish we'd dislike porn so much we wouldn't be effected by it, but we are, that's just the way it is. I don't know how much homework you've done on porn or if you frequent any other journals, but there is a lot to know, a lot of negative stuff related to porn that can make you hate it enough to steer clear. For me will power just wasn't enough, I have filters, blockers, a valuable item that i wagered if I PMO even once more, it must be destroyed. And lastly a couple of weeks ago I drew up a contract listing everything I'm forbidden to do and signed it. For me to win, I've had to keep adding layers of defense in order to succeed, because I PMO'd for decades. What has happened is our PFC(Pre-Frontal Cortex), the place in our brain that governs inhibition, well we've over ridden it so many times it no longer helps to stop us from pursuing porn. Over time we can rebuild this reflex, but we've been at this a while, we won't lose a 100# in 90 days. My Reboot will be complete in 5 days, but I'm not foolish enough to believe that 90 is a magical number and once across that line the fight is over, nope. We've got porn on the run, but we can't let up till he's dead and done.
Anothertry
Active Member
Sounds like you did great to get through a difficult situation that rocked you somewhat. Remember this: each time you manage that, it gets a little easier the next time....
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NoMorePr0n
Guest
although currently is still not the best period in my reboot at all, I gain a lot of strength by reaching 70 days! I have mentioned all of my brothers here have been a great help but i still want to give some of my you special credit. Thanks Chip, Anothertry and Branch, the contributions you guys have made meant and still mean a great deal to me.
Ofcourse this doesn't mean i respect anyone other out here less then these great guys. Please feel free to contact me if you want, hopefully i can give you some valuable advise to also reach 70 days of freedom!
Cheers my friends and may the force be with you!.....(Yes, i'm a star wars nerd, so what)
Ofcourse this doesn't mean i respect anyone other out here less then these great guys. Please feel free to contact me if you want, hopefully i can give you some valuable advise to also reach 70 days of freedom!
Cheers my friends and may the force be with you!.....(Yes, i'm a star wars nerd, so what
)
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Chip
Guest
Congrats on 70 Days PMO FREE !!!!
Making 70 is commendable and I know difficult at times. Make sure your finding healthy habits to replace the old one, nature abhors a vacuum.
Making 70 is commendable and I know difficult at times. Make sure your finding healthy habits to replace the old one, nature abhors a vacuum.