KeepUpTheGoodWork
Active Member
Well the last two days have been pretty fine, although I have had a lot of desires to MO. This morning I even edged a little bit during that half awake/ half asleep period before I got up. That's always my falling point and it feels like I don't know how to stop myself because I'm not fully awake yet. Maybe an alarm across the room would get me out of bed. I naturally wake up at around 6:30 lately, so it's not like I need one.
I think it's all chaser effect and I should have known better than giving in to the urge on Saturday. I'm going to power through the urges as best I can and remember that I need to make it to the weekend when I'll see my gf. Five days is nothing compared to the 40 days of no PMO I've already done.
In a way, my MO the other day does feel like I've slid back. I realize now that even though I did it with some rules in place (no fantasy, etc) I wasn't really ready to try it again. I feel some shame and disappointment that I couldn't just wait another few days until this weekend. I know my girlfriend was disappointed too, and I realized that even just MO at this time makes her upset.
I liked my life better without MO, so that's why I want to keep going.
Today I'll be getting back to the gym for the first time in a while. I hate how that happens - skip a session and before you know it, you haven't gone in a month. It's probably actually been more than that. Anyway, I need to get back on my goals. It's all a part of becoming a better man. No more little kid stuff.
I think it's all chaser effect and I should have known better than giving in to the urge on Saturday. I'm going to power through the urges as best I can and remember that I need to make it to the weekend when I'll see my gf. Five days is nothing compared to the 40 days of no PMO I've already done.
In a way, my MO the other day does feel like I've slid back. I realize now that even though I did it with some rules in place (no fantasy, etc) I wasn't really ready to try it again. I feel some shame and disappointment that I couldn't just wait another few days until this weekend. I know my girlfriend was disappointed too, and I realized that even just MO at this time makes her upset.
I liked my life better without MO, so that's why I want to keep going.
Today I'll be getting back to the gym for the first time in a while. I hate how that happens - skip a session and before you know it, you haven't gone in a month. It's probably actually been more than that. Anyway, I need to get back on my goals. It's all a part of becoming a better man. No more little kid stuff.