Finally seeking help (imaquitter)

Fappy

Fappy

Respected Member
7 days! thats literally a week!
If you go one more week youll see even more amazing (and sexy) benefits!
 
A

Andi

Member
I can rely to that! After two weeks I started to get butterflies in my stomach when I saw a beautiful girl on the street. If you are struggeling, just hang in and stay clean. The benefits are worth it!
 
imaquitter

imaquitter

Active Member
Andi said:
And I will try hardmode, except when my wife wants.
No PMO, even M with fantasy. Only the real thing, only with my W

Thats is a good idea. THats what I am doing. But I think you should not only wait for her. You should also force yourself to be active. Yes I know, "force" is not a good word. But in my case some slight force from her side helped me a lot. I had to learn that I am not like ""bam" I want sex now" anymore but need a bit of cuddling/kissing. And when you know that you dont HAVE to have sex, the pressure is going, it works out better.

I am relearning now, like a school boy, to have real sex. After being an egoistic fucked up creep for 25 years, I am learning to have pleasurable sex again and to take care of the needs of my gf. Not only, but also. Years back I was just all about my stuff.

So...I think only orgasm with the partner is great, because it is natural and it will help you definetly. But I think you have to relearn how to do it, talk a lot, take away the pressure on yourself. And if there is a fetish or something that you might think is inappropriate for your relationship and that might be a trigger....try to talk to her. Maybe she is open. (I am not referring specifically to you as I dont know enough about your case. Just want to say, that one has to take a lot of the sex that is in our heads over to the "real world").
Click to expand...

Thanks Andi.
I thought I was really addicted, but things are going well. We have different needs but it's perfect when it happens. The problem I have had is that I give up to fast, I want it to happen NOW and if not I get disappointed and I just wait for her to fall asleep so I can PMO. Now I instead try to think what she likes. I used to think she didn't like sex, now I understand I've been fooling myself. It's just that some days she's not in the mood, some days it takes a lot of kind persuasion and a few days she takes the initiative.

Quit being a selfish stubborn old pig
 
bob

bob

Respected Member
imaquitter said:
Quit being a selfish stubborn old pig
Click to expand...

Sometimes we get so hung up on the ability to perform sexually that we don't realize the need for simple caring and understanding in a relationship. We come here because our dicks don't work but then realize what we have vested in our relationship with our spouse/significant other.

Don't stop with fixing the mechanical/physical problems, make sure you look in the the emotional/psychological issues. I believe that is what makes a partnership stronger.

Peace 
 
imaquitter

imaquitter

Active Member
Logging off from Day 8 now.
good night

All went really well. Had a trigger but identified it and annihilated it ;D :D
 
imaquitter

imaquitter

Active Member
Great.
With friends.
Worked out too.
Starting to realize how bad I hate the dark side of me that Im getting rid of now. Slowly seeing more colours of life.
I have a really nice life and I'm generally feeling good. Just want all of me to be ok.

Nothing bad to report today.
Thanks for checking on me
 
imaquitter

imaquitter

Active Member
Just had the real stuff. (with my W ofc)
Do I need to look out for the chaser effect. How do i handle that?
 
bob

bob

Respected Member
You may. It will just feel like a intense feeling to do it again, and if you aren't able, you may think of negative alternatives (p). May not happen but prepare to do something to take your mind in another direction.

You are doing great!

Peace
 
imaquitter

imaquitter

Active Member
Keeping busy, day 12 went perfectly well.
Little by little it feels like I'm gonna make it this time.

Feel for writing every day here so that I have a responsibility. Have tried to talk to someone but if they don't ask me I feel that it doesn't matter and it's too long and to late and when my friend finally asks me it's to late and I don't feel like being honest and I fool myself and everyone else. Then the cycle starts again. Somehow it feels easier to be honest here, I just hope I'll be honest this time. Never tried a forum, so this may well be it.
 
Fappy

Fappy

Respected Member
You sure did! and remember:

A day without looking at porn is a good day!
                                              - Refromed Fapper
Make tomorrow a good day, too!
 
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