C
cranm329
Guest
Well done, Rex and thanks for the words of wisdom.
Terrible Suffering And Great Victory
- Thread starter Rex
- Start date
Rex
Active Member
Day 189:
Last week was a physical and emotional roller coaster. I had a very bad reaction with one of the prescription drugs I am taking for Lyme disease since I had around the same time I consumed cheese. The evening that I last posted here on the board I took this prescription drug and then an hour later to celebrate 6 months free from PMO, I ate 5 slices of my favorite NY style cheese pizza along with several strips of garlic cheesy bread from a local pizzeria. I ate it at home and by the time I was finished with the pizza and cheesy bread I had a massive reaction, I went flush, my body was burning up, I had terrible heart palpitations, and my heart rate was going like a jack rabbit while I was having a very massive panic attack. I figured it was just a massive panic attack so I didn't go to the hospital and just prayed as best as I could and waited it out. After about 2 hours the heart palpitations and rapid heart beat had stopped but I felt terrible nausea, dizziness, and was terribly anxious. I hardly slept that night and it took me about 3 days before I started feeling as good as I did before I had the pizza.
After doing some research on the Internet I discovered that the prescription drug I am taking can give a person a bad interaction when taken with cheese, none of this was mentioned on the prescription bottle warnings. However there were plenty of websites on the Internet that documented that all the reactions I had were due to taking this prescription drug and consuming cheese at the same time. Lesson learned, from now on every drug or supplement that I take I am going to spend hours researching any possible drug reactions or interactions with food or other supplements or prescription drugs. I have also given up eating cheese, I hadn't been eating it much in the last 2 months anyway since I have really cleaned up my diet but cheese is now permanently removed from the diet as I did with sugar a few months ago and a few other things.
On the reboot front, things couldn't be better. Still remaining vigilant and continuing the daily prayer life.
I had a thought the other day in which I realized that one of the reasons why I am so very sick with Lyme disease is because of my previous PMO addiction. The Lyme symptoms first started appearing back in 2010, but they started flaring up noticeably in 2011. The first symptoms were elevated anxiety and neck/upper back tightness and stiffness. It would flair up especially after I fell into PMO and if I stopped PMO for a few days it got better. So I figured it was the PMO that was causing these symptoms, however I was so addicted I couldn't stop the PMO. When I finally went cold turkey last September when the symptoms had gotten so bad, and then weeks after being PMO free I kept getting physically worse that's when I started to suspect something else. If I hadn't been a daily PMO addict back in 2010/2011 I would have had it diagnosed properly back then and would have saved myself the last decade of terrible suffering.
Sin does come with a price and I have paid heavy for it and still am paying for it. It's a strong reminder every time those temptations or urges hit, to remember that PMO is the main reason I am suffering so badly from the crippling effect of Lyme disease. This is my story of how PMO has ruined my life. That's all in the past, I am now punching away at Lyme with everything I have got, a few small victories here and a few small victories there while still facing the occasional setbacks. It's all a process, but I am continuing to move forward.
Thought of the day:
1) The seeds of the fall to PMO occur before the fall, usually long before the fall. It's the entertaining of the thoughts of a future fall that begin the process that eventually leads to the fall. It's in these moments when we may have thoughts of returning and/or recalling or thinking about the temporary pleasure from past PMO falls that we need to laugh at these temptations and urges and swat them away. This helps to make strong the mind and thought process, it nips the temptations and urges in the bud, so these temptations and urges can't later turn into an avalanche that leads to a fall to PMO.
Last week was a physical and emotional roller coaster. I had a very bad reaction with one of the prescription drugs I am taking for Lyme disease since I had around the same time I consumed cheese. The evening that I last posted here on the board I took this prescription drug and then an hour later to celebrate 6 months free from PMO, I ate 5 slices of my favorite NY style cheese pizza along with several strips of garlic cheesy bread from a local pizzeria. I ate it at home and by the time I was finished with the pizza and cheesy bread I had a massive reaction, I went flush, my body was burning up, I had terrible heart palpitations, and my heart rate was going like a jack rabbit while I was having a very massive panic attack. I figured it was just a massive panic attack so I didn't go to the hospital and just prayed as best as I could and waited it out. After about 2 hours the heart palpitations and rapid heart beat had stopped but I felt terrible nausea, dizziness, and was terribly anxious. I hardly slept that night and it took me about 3 days before I started feeling as good as I did before I had the pizza.
After doing some research on the Internet I discovered that the prescription drug I am taking can give a person a bad interaction when taken with cheese, none of this was mentioned on the prescription bottle warnings. However there were plenty of websites on the Internet that documented that all the reactions I had were due to taking this prescription drug and consuming cheese at the same time. Lesson learned, from now on every drug or supplement that I take I am going to spend hours researching any possible drug reactions or interactions with food or other supplements or prescription drugs. I have also given up eating cheese, I hadn't been eating it much in the last 2 months anyway since I have really cleaned up my diet but cheese is now permanently removed from the diet as I did with sugar a few months ago and a few other things.
On the reboot front, things couldn't be better. Still remaining vigilant and continuing the daily prayer life.
I had a thought the other day in which I realized that one of the reasons why I am so very sick with Lyme disease is because of my previous PMO addiction. The Lyme symptoms first started appearing back in 2010, but they started flaring up noticeably in 2011. The first symptoms were elevated anxiety and neck/upper back tightness and stiffness. It would flair up especially after I fell into PMO and if I stopped PMO for a few days it got better. So I figured it was the PMO that was causing these symptoms, however I was so addicted I couldn't stop the PMO. When I finally went cold turkey last September when the symptoms had gotten so bad, and then weeks after being PMO free I kept getting physically worse that's when I started to suspect something else. If I hadn't been a daily PMO addict back in 2010/2011 I would have had it diagnosed properly back then and would have saved myself the last decade of terrible suffering.
Sin does come with a price and I have paid heavy for it and still am paying for it. It's a strong reminder every time those temptations or urges hit, to remember that PMO is the main reason I am suffering so badly from the crippling effect of Lyme disease. This is my story of how PMO has ruined my life. That's all in the past, I am now punching away at Lyme with everything I have got, a few small victories here and a few small victories there while still facing the occasional setbacks. It's all a process, but I am continuing to move forward.
Thought of the day:
1) The seeds of the fall to PMO occur before the fall, usually long before the fall. It's the entertaining of the thoughts of a future fall that begin the process that eventually leads to the fall. It's in these moments when we may have thoughts of returning and/or recalling or thinking about the temporary pleasure from past PMO falls that we need to laugh at these temptations and urges and swat them away. This helps to make strong the mind and thought process, it nips the temptations and urges in the bud, so these temptations and urges can't later turn into an avalanche that leads to a fall to PMO.
Rex
Active Member
Day 190:
Not much to say today, I will continue the vigilance and my daily prayer life and will continue to move forward. I want to thank God again for allowing me to reach 190 days, I couldn't have done it without God. And thanks to all on the board for your prayers, encouragement, and friendship it's gotten me through some very difficult and tough days.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Giving into the temporary pleasure of PMO leads to slavery to PMO. True liberation of mind, body, and spirit is being free of PMO.
2) The reboot is not easy, but it's worth the suffering encountered during it. Remember no matter how bad the temptations, urges, body aches, and other symptoms get during the reboot process never forget you are healing. Don't be too hard on yourself and don't push too hard to speed up the recovery, just stay free from PMO and everything will fall into place. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day, it's going to take some time to heal the mind, body, and soul. Keep moving forward and don't look back.
Not much to say today, I will continue the vigilance and my daily prayer life and will continue to move forward. I want to thank God again for allowing me to reach 190 days, I couldn't have done it without God. And thanks to all on the board for your prayers, encouragement, and friendship it's gotten me through some very difficult and tough days.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Giving into the temporary pleasure of PMO leads to slavery to PMO. True liberation of mind, body, and spirit is being free of PMO.
2) The reboot is not easy, but it's worth the suffering encountered during it. Remember no matter how bad the temptations, urges, body aches, and other symptoms get during the reboot process never forget you are healing. Don't be too hard on yourself and don't push too hard to speed up the recovery, just stay free from PMO and everything will fall into place. Remember, Rome wasn't built in a day, it's going to take some time to heal the mind, body, and soul. Keep moving forward and don't look back.
Rex
Active Member
Day 191:
Energy level = 0% A new supplement/herb to my doctor prescribed cocktail of antibiotics and natural supplements has me feeling like a truck ran over me. The nausea and discomfort and weakness are terrible, just another fun day fighting Lyme disease. Adding to the mix I have been hit with bad temptations and urges this morning on the PMO front. These temptations and urges always seem to hit when I am at my worst physically and am really taking a beating from Lyme. It's as if the devil takes pleasure in tormenting me with temptation when I am at my worst physically. However I swatted those temptations and urges away and remain more vigilant than ever. I was also so weak and tired last night I only was able to complete 1 1/2 Rosaries instead of the normal 3 Rosaries, so that usually weakens me spiritually when I don't do the normal 3 Rosaries a day. Never-the-less I am still PMO free and will continue to remain vigilant.
There are those days that seem so dark, today is one of them but I know in all of this suffering that God will get me through these dark days and eventually I will permanently turn the corner to beating this Lyme disease with His healing.
Thoughts of the day:
1) PMO is never an option
2) PMO first comes in appearance as a friend, but then turns into a conquerer and enslaver of the mind, body, and soul. PMO is the ultimate Trojan horse that's only aim is our total destruction.
Energy level = 0% A new supplement/herb to my doctor prescribed cocktail of antibiotics and natural supplements has me feeling like a truck ran over me. The nausea and discomfort and weakness are terrible, just another fun day fighting Lyme disease. Adding to the mix I have been hit with bad temptations and urges this morning on the PMO front. These temptations and urges always seem to hit when I am at my worst physically and am really taking a beating from Lyme. It's as if the devil takes pleasure in tormenting me with temptation when I am at my worst physically. However I swatted those temptations and urges away and remain more vigilant than ever. I was also so weak and tired last night I only was able to complete 1 1/2 Rosaries instead of the normal 3 Rosaries, so that usually weakens me spiritually when I don't do the normal 3 Rosaries a day. Never-the-less I am still PMO free and will continue to remain vigilant.
There are those days that seem so dark, today is one of them but I know in all of this suffering that God will get me through these dark days and eventually I will permanently turn the corner to beating this Lyme disease with His healing.
Thoughts of the day:
1) PMO is never an option
2) PMO first comes in appearance as a friend, but then turns into a conquerer and enslaver of the mind, body, and soul. PMO is the ultimate Trojan horse that's only aim is our total destruction.
J
J01
Guest
Rex, that was an inspirational post-thanks! Hopefully that fighting spirit can flow to those of us who read your post. I also think your description of the battle that wages in the unseen realm was quite apt.
The thoughts of the day that you listed are so basic yet so true and it is good to be reminded of them. Keep on trucking friend.
The thoughts of the day that you listed are so basic yet so true and it is good to be reminded of them. Keep on trucking friend.
Rex
Active Member
Day 214:
Reboot Update: I can't believe it's now been 214 days or 7 months and 2 days that I have been free from PMO. Earlier this morning I fired up an old MacBook Air that I had not used at in long time looking for some old files. I deleted any porn or suggestive pictures off of this laptop several months ago. I used the web browser on this laptop this morning and noticed I still had a few porn related bookmarks listed in the browser, my first reaction was to go to the edit bookmarks and delete all the bookmarks in the browser. And without even a second thought, Poof, these old bookmarks were gone in less than 20 seconds when I deleted them all. There were no second thoughts, deleting them was my preferred action from the bottom of my heart. I am using this example to illustrate how the reboot over time changes the thought process to where your first inclination is to do the right thing and stay away from porn or anything that leads to it. For anyone out there struggling it gets easier over time, much easier. So stick with the program and keep moving forward and remain vigilant. For me the prayer life has been a core ingredient to my recovery, the three Rosaries a day have given me the grace to stay away from PMO.
Health Update: My health has been slowly improving, I still struggle with the symptoms of Lyme. After 4-5 months on antibiotics I came to realize they were only making me sicker. Had some rough days earlier in the month. I ditched the antibiotics about 2 1/2 weeks ago and will stick with a healthy gluten-free, sugar free, and cheese free detox diet along with taking natural supplements to boast my immune system which the illness and the antibiotics have wrecked. Once my immune system improves it should be able to kick the Lyme bacteria out of my body along with the Lyme co-infections in my body.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Don't worry about how you feel during the reboot process it will get easier over time, the benefits of being free from PMO take a while to show up. It's like the seasons, you have to go through fall and winter before you reach spring.
2) There's no turning back, PMO offers you nothing. When the temptations and urges hit, don't think about the enticement of PMO, instead focus on how bad you felt in the past after you fell into PMO.
Reboot Update: I can't believe it's now been 214 days or 7 months and 2 days that I have been free from PMO. Earlier this morning I fired up an old MacBook Air that I had not used at in long time looking for some old files. I deleted any porn or suggestive pictures off of this laptop several months ago. I used the web browser on this laptop this morning and noticed I still had a few porn related bookmarks listed in the browser, my first reaction was to go to the edit bookmarks and delete all the bookmarks in the browser. And without even a second thought, Poof, these old bookmarks were gone in less than 20 seconds when I deleted them all. There were no second thoughts, deleting them was my preferred action from the bottom of my heart. I am using this example to illustrate how the reboot over time changes the thought process to where your first inclination is to do the right thing and stay away from porn or anything that leads to it. For anyone out there struggling it gets easier over time, much easier. So stick with the program and keep moving forward and remain vigilant. For me the prayer life has been a core ingredient to my recovery, the three Rosaries a day have given me the grace to stay away from PMO.
Health Update: My health has been slowly improving, I still struggle with the symptoms of Lyme. After 4-5 months on antibiotics I came to realize they were only making me sicker. Had some rough days earlier in the month. I ditched the antibiotics about 2 1/2 weeks ago and will stick with a healthy gluten-free, sugar free, and cheese free detox diet along with taking natural supplements to boast my immune system which the illness and the antibiotics have wrecked. Once my immune system improves it should be able to kick the Lyme bacteria out of my body along with the Lyme co-infections in my body.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Don't worry about how you feel during the reboot process it will get easier over time, the benefits of being free from PMO take a while to show up. It's like the seasons, you have to go through fall and winter before you reach spring.
2) There's no turning back, PMO offers you nothing. When the temptations and urges hit, don't think about the enticement of PMO, instead focus on how bad you felt in the past after you fell into PMO.
Hi Rex, thanks for the updates and thoughts. Great work with the reboot and I hope the recovery from Lyme disease continues. You really have my respect in having the toughness to be winning these two battles.
The seasons analogy works for me as well. Sometimes, even in the spring we get days that are gloomy, windy and rainy, but we have to get through them the best we can and enjoy the sunshine when it comes.
Keep strong.
The seasons analogy works for me as well. Sometimes, even in the spring we get days that are gloomy, windy and rainy, but we have to get through them the best we can and enjoy the sunshine when it comes.
Keep strong.
Rex
Active Member
BigMog said:
BigMog,
Many thanks for you words of encouragement and support. Since my last post there have been ups and downs however the ups are becoming a little more frequent and downs little less frequent. So that's a big step in the right direction for me.
Day 231:
Reboot Update: I am continuing on auto pilot, the temptations and urges no longer have the power they once had. It's now second nature to stay clean. The temptations seem to get more clever in some respects, with strange rationals that hit the brain randomly. I immediately see them for what they are and just swat those temptations away and they are gone, there's no longer the long term dwelling on the temptations or urges like I did before, I swat them away and they are gone. I am continuing to remain vigilant and continue the daily prayer life which includes praying 3 Rosaries a day.
Thoughts of the day:
1) The fall to PMO doesn't usually occur when it happens, no, actually it happens before that, sometimes long before that. The fall begins as soon as you begin to rationalize in your brain the fall to PMO. This can be a day or week, or even months before the fall. Don't ever rationalize a fall to PMO since once you have agreed to it in your thoughts, the fall will soon arrive. And if you have already rationalized the fall in your thoughts but haven't fallen yet, change your thoughts right now and say "no way, it's not going to happen" and reverse the thought process.
2) One of the main reasons many of us fell into PMO in the first place are due to those feelings of worthlessness, or just feeling down about circumstances that are out of our control. PMO tricked all of us into believing it offered us some relief from these and the stresses of our lives. However as we soon discovered that PMO was trickery, it was too late we were badly addicted. One of the ways to heal from PMO is to stop worrying about the day-to-day setbacks and stresses and put these problems and setbacks in God's hands. And when those thoughts of worthlessness hit, remember we are all made in God's image and likeness and no matter what He loves us and cares for us more than we can fathom.
...
workinprogressUK
Well-Known Member
Rex said:
That's some of the best advice I've read in ages, Rex. Thanks for sharing. Congrats on your continuing success.
Rex
Active Member
workinprogressUK said:
workinprogressUK,
Thanks for the encouragement and kind words!
Day 246 (8 months, 4 days):
Reboot Update: Just in case you were wondering, I don't count the days or even the weeks or months anymore, haven't in a few months. The new norm is staying clean and on most days I don't even think about how long it has been since I started the reboot to my new life. Before I post here, I use the handy Days Calculator at timeanddate.com to figure out how long I have been clean and free from PMO. I am suffering through a lot stuff right now, but its such a big weight off my shoulders and my soul that I no longer am burdened with a PMO addiction. It's been a lot of work with remaining vigilant and continuing with the daily prayer life. This reboot I put in God's hands and I achieved success beyond my wildest dreams. My best past reboot was back in 2017 when I went 28 days, that seemed like I climbed the mountain. Where I am today at day number 246, is like going to Mars, all possible only through God's grace.
Health Update: Just like I struggled for years to beat a PMO addiction that I thought was unbeatable, by turning to God it's now a thing of the past, ancient history. My battle strategy with my terrible Lyme disease and its coinfections is the same, I am putting this battle in God's hands. I have had this disease for at least the last 10 years and the suffering especially the last year have for many days become so unbearable, I am placing this battle in God's hands. Even though I have been undergoing treatment the last 7 months with nothing seeming to work (tried so many different treatments and strategies), I feel like I am on a carousel that keeps going around in circles or trapped in a park where I keep going around in circles and none of the paths lead out of the park. On days when I feel I am finally making progress a few days later I go back 8 months back to ground zero and can't even function with symptoms so bad I encounter suffering so bad it brings me to my knees along with feelings of utter hopelessness. However no matter how bad those days are God is always there to get me through them. I am 100% confident that God will deliver me from this illness the same way he has freed me from my PMO addiction.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Don't let the temptations or urges scare you, fear is one of the big factors in a fall to PMO. Do not pay any attention to these temptations or urges just like you ignore a fool who bothers you with nonsense. Laugh when those temptations seem so hard to resist, this always seems to lessen their sting.
2) Don't ponder, dwell, or even give any thought concerning the temptations when they hit. Part of the trickery of the temptations is to get your mind dwelling, pondering, or thinking about them. When they hit immediately change your thoughts to something else. For instance think about a hobby like baseball and start thinking or remembering which hitters had the best batting averages, which pitchers had the best ERAs, or what teams went to the World Series the most times. Or if your hobby is horticulture start thinking about different plants and flowers and where they originated. Every time the temptations hit you move your thoughts elsewhere, then these temptations can't plant any seeds in your subconscious.
3) Never give up, keep trying. When you fall get right back on the wagon, don't fall into the PMO marathon that usually follows a fall after a reboot. Those PMO marathons can last weeks, months, even years before you're able to get back on the wagon for another reboot. For instance I fell in late-January 2017 after a 28 day reboot, instead of getting back on the wagon I fell into a PMO marathon that lasted until September 2018 when I finally got back on the wagon. I should have gotten right back on the wagon in late-January 2017.
4) Just like with any successful 12-step program, the centerpiece is turning to God to help you beat the addiction, it's imperative to put your battle with PMO in God's hands. He will get this terrible addiction off your back and give you a life you never thought possible. This is a spiritual battle for your soul. The chains of the PMO addiction are heavy and strong, but can't stand up to the mighty power of God.
MosesY
Active Member
You quoted Isaiah 41:10 at some point, I was reading through your journal. That was a real encouragement to me. I found this quote from Oswald Chambers the other day; "There are times when God cannot reveal Himself in any other way than in His majesty, and it is the awesomeness of the vision which brings you to the delight of despair. You experience this joy in hopelessness, realizing that if you are ever to be raised up it must be by the hand of God." I printed these passages and hung them on my desk.
Rex
Active Member
BigMog and MosesY,
Thanks for the words of encouragement! MosesY, thank you for posting the Oswald Chambers quote it is so very true, very profound words there. I am going to print it these words and put them on my desk too.
Day 289 (9 months, 16 days):
Reboot Update: Sorry for taking so long to post an update, I have continued to remain vigilant and continued the prayer life and I am now about 9 1/2 months clean. For those going through the tough journey early in the reboot process, I can give you reassurance that it will get easier, much easier the longer you stick with it. The last two months were the easiest on the reboot. Staying clean almost becomes second nature. When the temptations hit my first response is to change my thoughts immediately and move on. Its now my preferred notion to want to stay clean and let nothing get in the way of that.
Health Update: It's been a wild roller coaster ride with many ups and downs but overall I am seeing some improvements and moving in the right direction in my battle with Lyme disease. Just like my battle to beat PMO, I am placing this healing in God's hands and continuing to move forward.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Don't focus too much on the upcoming weeks, months, or years when on the reboot process. Just take one day at a time. The days will then turn into weeks and then months and then years free from PMO.
2) When the urges hit keep focusing instead on how much better you will feel after you beat the temptation since the urges and temptations will pass.
3) PMO is a selfish addiction where our life is centered around our pleasure and fulfillment of carnal desires. One way to break the addiction is to do things for others, stop thinking about yourself and help others. It doesn't have to be anything big, even small things we can do for others helps to break this addiction.
Thanks for the words of encouragement! MosesY, thank you for posting the Oswald Chambers quote it is so very true, very profound words there. I am going to print it these words and put them on my desk too.
Day 289 (9 months, 16 days):
Reboot Update: Sorry for taking so long to post an update, I have continued to remain vigilant and continued the prayer life and I am now about 9 1/2 months clean. For those going through the tough journey early in the reboot process, I can give you reassurance that it will get easier, much easier the longer you stick with it. The last two months were the easiest on the reboot. Staying clean almost becomes second nature. When the temptations hit my first response is to change my thoughts immediately and move on. Its now my preferred notion to want to stay clean and let nothing get in the way of that.
Health Update: It's been a wild roller coaster ride with many ups and downs but overall I am seeing some improvements and moving in the right direction in my battle with Lyme disease. Just like my battle to beat PMO, I am placing this healing in God's hands and continuing to move forward.
Thoughts of the day:
1) Don't focus too much on the upcoming weeks, months, or years when on the reboot process. Just take one day at a time. The days will then turn into weeks and then months and then years free from PMO.
2) When the urges hit keep focusing instead on how much better you will feel after you beat the temptation since the urges and temptations will pass.
3) PMO is a selfish addiction where our life is centered around our pleasure and fulfillment of carnal desires. One way to break the addiction is to do things for others, stop thinking about yourself and help others. It doesn't have to be anything big, even small things we can do for others helps to break this addiction.
Rex
Active Member
Day 311 (10 months, 8 days):
Reboot Update: I am still remaining vigilant and have continued the prayer life and placing my reboot in God's hands. I certainly would not be here over 10 months free from PMO if it wasn't for God's help and assistance. The Rosary has been my sword slashing this addiction, I have been praying 3 Rosaries a day.
Health Update: Been one wild roller coaster ride, but I am slowly getting better and feeling better. Indeed God is healing me. Today I am just one step further into my new life. No matter how bad a day I have healthwise, the chains of my former PMO addiction have been broken, so I am a free man.
Thoughts of the day:
1) We can't win this battle alone. No matter how hard I tried in the past (for the thirty years I tried to quit), I kept falling back into PMO. It was only when I decided last year to put this battle into God's hands that I finally was able to start on the path for real victory. The centerpiece of all 12 step recovery programs is that victory over the addiction requires the assistance of God.
2) The Rosary is the most powerful weapon we have against the addiction of PMO and any other sin and vice. It's a vice breaker. Praying 3 Rosaries a day broke the chains of the addiction for me. During the reboot process if I faltered in saying 3 Rosaries a day and didn't pray any Rosaries I could feel myself slipping where the urges were getting stronger and stronger. When I prayed 3 Rosaries a day the urges got weaker and weaker and it was like I was on auto pilot and not hard to stay on the straight and narrow.
The Rosary as a Spiritual Weapon:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1MdrO__5-g
For the full video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwVdYXyxln0
Reboot Update: I am still remaining vigilant and have continued the prayer life and placing my reboot in God's hands. I certainly would not be here over 10 months free from PMO if it wasn't for God's help and assistance. The Rosary has been my sword slashing this addiction, I have been praying 3 Rosaries a day.
Health Update: Been one wild roller coaster ride, but I am slowly getting better and feeling better. Indeed God is healing me. Today I am just one step further into my new life. No matter how bad a day I have healthwise, the chains of my former PMO addiction have been broken, so I am a free man.
Thoughts of the day:
1) We can't win this battle alone. No matter how hard I tried in the past (for the thirty years I tried to quit), I kept falling back into PMO. It was only when I decided last year to put this battle into God's hands that I finally was able to start on the path for real victory. The centerpiece of all 12 step recovery programs is that victory over the addiction requires the assistance of God.
2) The Rosary is the most powerful weapon we have against the addiction of PMO and any other sin and vice. It's a vice breaker. Praying 3 Rosaries a day broke the chains of the addiction for me. During the reboot process if I faltered in saying 3 Rosaries a day and didn't pray any Rosaries I could feel myself slipping where the urges were getting stronger and stronger. When I prayed 3 Rosaries a day the urges got weaker and weaker and it was like I was on auto pilot and not hard to stay on the straight and narrow.
The Rosary as a Spiritual Weapon:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1MdrO__5-g
For the full video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwVdYXyxln0
hope2reboot
Member
Congrats Rex, keep doing what you?re doing. So cool about the rosary. I?m not Catholic but definitely believe in the power of prayer, which in my opinion is pretty much what the rosary is. My fianc? is Catholic and I?m Protestant. We?re both very practising of what our Christian beliefs are and respect each other?s belief where we differ. It?s like her uncle said, who is also Catholic, ?Jesus is what matters?. Anyways, thanks for writing your journal. Reading other people?s journals is definitely helping me in this battle. I?ve noticed this new drug is not a respecter of persons. So many of us probably disagree on a lot of stuff but I think we all agree that this new drug is not good for us.
Rex
Active Member
hope2reboot said:
hope2reboot,
Sorry for the delayed response. So very true Jesus is what really matters, and I wouldn't be where I am today a little over a 1 year free from PMO without Jesus' help. However let me say that the Rosary was the sword that slashed and destroyed a more than 3 decade battle of fighting a porn and masturbation addiction. I had no idea how powerful the Rosary is. I grew up Catholic and there were many years when I never prayed even 1 Rosary. I tried everything to stop this wretched addiction, the only thing that worked for me was the Rosary. Back a few days before the new year of 2017, I began in desperation praying three Rosaries a day, and I continued to pray them every day and I went 28 days free from PMO. I then got lazy and stopped praying the three Rosaries a day and then I soon fell to PMO again. And then I fell back into PMO marathon for almost 2 years and finally deciding to pray the three Rosaries a day since September 2018. And the results speak for themselves I have been porn and masturbation free for a little over a year. I can't describe how I have changed, I am no longer enslaved to PMO or lust, my whole life has changed.
Try praying 1 Rosary every day for a month, I will guarantee that you'll start to beat the PMO addiction. You don't have to be Catholic to pray the Rosary. Remember you are praying to Mary to intercede to her Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ. She's a powerful intercessor. Put another way remember the marriage at Cana in John chapter 2:1-11? When the wine ran out Jesus had no intention to perform the miracle of changing the water into wine, it was only through the pleading of His mother Mary the Blessed Virgin Mary that He relented and performed the miracle. We are praying the Rosary to Jesus, it's His mother through the Rosary who intercedes on our behalf to ask Jesus to answer our prayers. Believe me the Rosary works, I am living proof. I will be saying it every day for the rest of my life which now has so much promise since PMO is behind me. There are 15 promises of the Rosary and this one kept popping into my head, and finally after trying everything to beat PMO, this promise was what caused me to try the Rosary:
"The Rosary shall be a powerful armor against hell, it will destroy vice, decrease sin, and defeat heresies."
Keep fighting the good fight!
Rex
Active Member
Day 368 (1 Year, 2 days):
Reboot Update: I am now were I always wanted to be for the last 3 decades, a little over 1 year free from PMO. I owe all the thanks to God and the sword of the Rosary. Please read the previous post above for more details. Everything has changed for the better I never thought this day would arrive where I would be over a year free from PMO. I will continue to be vigilant and I am going to continue to pray at least 1 Rosary a day for the rest of my life.
Health Update: Still suffering from Lyme, having plenty of ups and downs but I am seeing some improvement of some of the symptoms and I believe just as the PMO addiction had a 100% hold on me until I prayed the daily Rosary, my chronic illness will also in the near future be eradicated through the daily Rosary.
Good luck to everyone in this battle, I will continue to check in and give updates....
Reboot Update: I am now were I always wanted to be for the last 3 decades, a little over 1 year free from PMO. I owe all the thanks to God and the sword of the Rosary. Please read the previous post above for more details. Everything has changed for the better I never thought this day would arrive where I would be over a year free from PMO. I will continue to be vigilant and I am going to continue to pray at least 1 Rosary a day for the rest of my life.
Health Update: Still suffering from Lyme, having plenty of ups and downs but I am seeing some improvement of some of the symptoms and I believe just as the PMO addiction had a 100% hold on me until I prayed the daily Rosary, my chronic illness will also in the near future be eradicated through the daily Rosary.
Good luck to everyone in this battle, I will continue to check in and give updates....
J
J01
Guest
Excellent report Rex-nice job! Hope you continue to see some improvements from the physical ailments. Keep going, and keep in touch!