Afternoon everyone...
So, I'm back again and this time I feel like I'm at rock bottom. I've completed day 1 of what is going to be a very long and stressful journey but this time I have decided this is it - no more. I've posted sporadically on this site about my struggles with this addiction but it seems that the end of 2021 is when I've hit rock bottom. I'm disgusted with myself and am in serious significant debt from using cam sites. I am at my overdraft limit, I am maxed out on two credit cards and I am in the midst of paying off a loan I took out two years ago to pay for something else. I have no money to pay my tax bill and I have nobody that I can talk to about this.
I'm married, two kids, wider family. I spoke to one member of my family about this 2.5 years ago but that conversation has stopped and am alone again in trying to deal with this. I've previously had counselling/therapy but that stopped during the first Covid lockdown in the UK and I haven't been back. I'm not sure why - I think it's probably that by going back its admitting to failing at this.
My wife found out about my porn addiction about five years ago. However, she didn't know about my webcam use. I started counselling in 2017 for three years but continued to use porn and cams during this time. There was a period at the start where I had no use for about 8 weeks but then it slowly, insidiously started creeping back in.
I don't know how I go about talking to my family about this. How have others talked to their family about this and what has the fallout been? I want to open up to my wife but know that my marriage will be over. I could speak to my wider family but know that they will want me to speak to my wife about this as well. I don't know where to turn and the more depressed I get about this, the more likely I am to use porn/cam sites to escape from the reality that is my life.
Help me....
So, I'm back again and this time I feel like I'm at rock bottom. I've completed day 1 of what is going to be a very long and stressful journey but this time I have decided this is it - no more. I've posted sporadically on this site about my struggles with this addiction but it seems that the end of 2021 is when I've hit rock bottom. I'm disgusted with myself and am in serious significant debt from using cam sites. I am at my overdraft limit, I am maxed out on two credit cards and I am in the midst of paying off a loan I took out two years ago to pay for something else. I have no money to pay my tax bill and I have nobody that I can talk to about this.
I'm married, two kids, wider family. I spoke to one member of my family about this 2.5 years ago but that conversation has stopped and am alone again in trying to deal with this. I've previously had counselling/therapy but that stopped during the first Covid lockdown in the UK and I haven't been back. I'm not sure why - I think it's probably that by going back its admitting to failing at this.
My wife found out about my porn addiction about five years ago. However, she didn't know about my webcam use. I started counselling in 2017 for three years but continued to use porn and cams during this time. There was a period at the start where I had no use for about 8 weeks but then it slowly, insidiously started creeping back in.
I don't know how I go about talking to my family about this. How have others talked to their family about this and what has the fallout been? I want to open up to my wife but know that my marriage will be over. I could speak to my wider family but know that they will want me to speak to my wife about this as well. I don't know where to turn and the more depressed I get about this, the more likely I am to use porn/cam sites to escape from the reality that is my life.
Help me....